for Shadows10/27/2009 c1 
1SituationalExtrovert
I found this deeply disturbing. And I liked it. A lot.
An old saying springs to mind: "Be careful what you wish for; you just might get it."
Go you!
1SituationalExtrovertI found this deeply disturbing. And I liked it. A lot.
An old saying springs to mind: "Be careful what you wish for; you just might get it."
Go you!
10/12/2009 c1 5godwit
Interesting scenario that carries Dumbledore's words about choices to its extreme.
"Her hair seems strange – it's matted, messy, and red in a bloodless, lifeless way... like the autumn leaves that had began to rot." I think this is a very good image of how Snape's view of Lily has changed.
5godwitInteresting scenario that carries Dumbledore's words about choices to its extreme.
"Her hair seems strange – it's matted, messy, and red in a bloodless, lifeless way... like the autumn leaves that had began to rot." I think this is a very good image of how Snape's view of Lily has changed.
10/10/2009 c1 Kari1
amazing as usual.
Your writing is the epitome of the concept of 'fanfiction': "what if?". You don't just leave it as there's no Harry and Voldemort wasn't defeated but you explore the concept that Lily's character had to go through a drastic change in that moment in order to go against all that she previously stood for and take that one step out of the way..
I love that you recognized and warned of OOC and you taught me a lesson, that from so great an author, out of character does not mean overly silly and bad.
amazing as usual.
Your writing is the epitome of the concept of 'fanfiction': "what if?". You don't just leave it as there's no Harry and Voldemort wasn't defeated but you explore the concept that Lily's character had to go through a drastic change in that moment in order to go against all that she previously stood for and take that one step out of the way..
I love that you recognized and warned of OOC and you taught me a lesson, that from so great an author, out of character does not mean overly silly and bad.
10/10/2009 c1 13Conqueror Worm
Oh! This was very good; I wasn't expecting it to be so dark, despite the summary.
Have you ever read Volume One of Pet Shop of Horrors: Tokyo? There's a story in it that reminds me somewhat of this.
Excellent story. I'm off to rifle through your profile for more.
13Conqueror WormOh! This was very good; I wasn't expecting it to be so dark, despite the summary.
Have you ever read Volume One of Pet Shop of Horrors: Tokyo? There's a story in it that reminds me somewhat of this.
Excellent story. I'm off to rifle through your profile for more.
10/9/2009 c1 17shyfoxling
You wrote "fin" but the story isn't marked "complete"... is this intened to continue?
17shyfoxlingYou wrote "fin" but the story isn't marked "complete"... is this intened to continue?
10/7/2009 c1 16whitehound
Mm - he himself is so determined to defend that he couldn't feel really connected to someone who didn't.
See the little, dancing typoes:
He suddenly isn't shure what she is asking. There's a strange mixtrue - sure, mixture
silouette - silhouette
having a conersation with him - conversation
16whitehoundMm - he himself is so determined to defend that he couldn't feel really connected to someone who didn't.
See the little, dancing typoes:
He suddenly isn't shure what she is asking. There's a strange mixtrue - sure, mixture
silouette - silhouette
having a conersation with him - conversation
10/7/2009 c1 11Escoger
This...is brilliant! Is it just a oneshot, or is it going to continue?
If it's just a oneshot, then would it be alright if I wrote a continuation to it or something?
Escoger
11EscogerThis...is brilliant! Is it just a oneshot, or is it going to continue?
If it's just a oneshot, then would it be alright if I wrote a continuation to it or something?
Escoger
10/7/2009 c1 17Kitsune1978
Angst, yes... I have been warned... but it was still heart-wrenching. I have never thought of Lily stepping aside, I'd rather thought of her being hexed with Incarcerous curse and handed to Snape as his reward.
Very, very sad story. Thanks for sharing it.
17Kitsune1978Angst, yes... I have been warned... but it was still heart-wrenching. I have never thought of Lily stepping aside, I'd rather thought of her being hexed with Incarcerous curse and handed to Snape as his reward.
Very, very sad story. Thanks for sharing it.
10/6/2009 c1 38Profound Yaoi
This was eerily beautiful. It was very well written. The descriptions were vivid and let me picture what was happening as I read.
I think you've done an excellent portrayal of what would probably have happened if Lily had actually stepped aside and let Harry die. I don't think Severus would have seen her as the same woman, like you mentioned in the story. I think he would most likely love her still, but with nothing more than a pitying kind of affection... and perhaps a guilty regret? (As in, he feels as though he would rather have loved a dead woman who was true to herself, rather than a live woman who gave up on her morals and beliefs that she'd been fighting so hard to protect.)
You've shown all that wonderfully. It was so sad. I love it! If that doesn't make me sound too crazy...
38Profound YaoiThis was eerily beautiful. It was very well written. The descriptions were vivid and let me picture what was happening as I read.
I think you've done an excellent portrayal of what would probably have happened if Lily had actually stepped aside and let Harry die. I don't think Severus would have seen her as the same woman, like you mentioned in the story. I think he would most likely love her still, but with nothing more than a pitying kind of affection... and perhaps a guilty regret? (As in, he feels as though he would rather have loved a dead woman who was true to herself, rather than a live woman who gave up on her morals and beliefs that she'd been fighting so hard to protect.)
You've shown all that wonderfully. It was so sad. I love it! If that doesn't make me sound too crazy...