for Naru Chara11/4/2012 c8 willam and jack and jake
lol 'Now what?" "We better put that in your freezer before it defrosts unless you want to deal with it again.' lol very funny
lol 'Now what?" "We better put that in your freezer before it defrosts unless you want to deal with it again.' lol very funny
9/14/2012 c10 
4GirlAnimePrincess
I liked your story, but I noticed somethings that could be done better.
1) You are going way too fast. just try to make the chapters longer, okay? Dont speed through anything, because you might find yourself getting cool new ideas from a seemingly insignificant little detail in another chapter.
2) Head hopping too much bad. Try to stick with one character. Everyone else is secondary. You can show some of whats happening to them, but try not to get into their head and know what they think. that privaledge is main character only.
Those are the only things I could notice that might need fixing.
now as for your question, How many transformations does amu have, lets see:
Amulet Heart
Amulet Spade
Amulet Clover
Amulet Dia
Amulet Angel
Amulet Devil
Amulet Fortune
and that all the canon ones.
Well, This is the end of my review, so there is just one more thing to say. My advice up there is not meant to be condescending, holier-then-thou, snotty, rude, or anything like that. I am trying to help you grow as a writer, and hopefully by repeating it to myself I will get out or stay out of any bad habits as well :P
Well, Until next time, whenever that is.
4GirlAnimePrincessI liked your story, but I noticed somethings that could be done better.
1) You are going way too fast. just try to make the chapters longer, okay? Dont speed through anything, because you might find yourself getting cool new ideas from a seemingly insignificant little detail in another chapter.
2) Head hopping too much bad. Try to stick with one character. Everyone else is secondary. You can show some of whats happening to them, but try not to get into their head and know what they think. that privaledge is main character only.
Those are the only things I could notice that might need fixing.
now as for your question, How many transformations does amu have, lets see:
Amulet Heart
Amulet Spade
Amulet Clover
Amulet Dia
Amulet Angel
Amulet Devil
Amulet Fortune
and that all the canon ones.
Well, This is the end of my review, so there is just one more thing to say. My advice up there is not meant to be condescending, holier-then-thou, snotty, rude, or anything like that. I am trying to help you grow as a writer, and hopefully by repeating it to myself I will get out or stay out of any bad habits as well :P
Well, Until next time, whenever that is.
9/22/2011 c8 10DeidaraClone
PLEASE UPDATE I'M BEGGING YOU! *is forced into a Character Change by her OC's Chara and growls like a dog as white ears pop up on her head and a beaded necklace with teeth on it around her neck* IF YOU DON'T UPDATE THEN GOD DAMMIT I'LL RIP YOU TO **ING SHREDS! *Character Change wears off* Gomen ne...He's a bit violent...
10DeidaraClonePLEASE UPDATE I'M BEGGING YOU! *is forced into a Character Change by her OC's Chara and growls like a dog as white ears pop up on her head and a beaded necklace with teeth on it around her neck* IF YOU DON'T UPDATE THEN GOD DAMMIT I'LL RIP YOU TO **ING SHREDS! *Character Change wears off* Gomen ne...He's a bit violent...
9/22/2011 c2 DeidaraClone
Okay, I know ive of them; Naruto, Hinata, Sasuke, Sakura, and Tsunade. I'm thinking the other one is either Sai or Kakashi, but I'm not sure.
Okay, I know ive of them; Naruto, Hinata, Sasuke, Sakura, and Tsunade. I'm thinking the other one is either Sai or Kakashi, but I'm not sure.