for Sonic & Final Fantasy AllStars Grand Prix3/19/2012 c1 
12OMNISENSE95
Okay, issue: There's a FFVII character named Zack; Zack Faire, main protagonist of Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII. Unless that Zack isn't in this story, there will be a truckload of confusion.
12OMNISENSE95Okay, issue: There's a FFVII character named Zack; Zack Faire, main protagonist of Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII. Unless that Zack isn't in this story, there will be a truckload of confusion.
12/15/2010 c3 1hiagyl
The chapter was way to short. You need to start putting in more details and extending what happens in the races. I mean if you going to have an entire story based on raceing that needs to be a part were most of the action is. Rather than the quick seen's youv had thus far.
1hiagylThe chapter was way to short. You need to start putting in more details and extending what happens in the races. I mean if you going to have an entire story based on raceing that needs to be a part were most of the action is. Rather than the quick seen's youv had thus far.
11/16/2010 c1 hiagyl
Yo dude its retsu. this is alright. But everything is goin way to fast. You need a lot more details and stuff.
Yo dude its retsu. this is alright. But everything is goin way to fast. You need a lot more details and stuff.
11/8/2010 c1 3The Amaria Shadow
You're doing well for a beginner! Just keep doing what you're doing & you'll succeed in the long run! Hope to see a new chapter soon!
3The Amaria ShadowYou're doing well for a beginner! Just keep doing what you're doing & you'll succeed in the long run! Hope to see a new chapter soon!
10/27/2010 c1 7Evil Riggs
This doesn't make much sense, truth be told. My main advice to you would be to slow down the action, making sure to describe the scenes, characters, and settings as you go. Really, the best way to achieve this (it's a tricky balance, to be sure) is to read other published fiction and see how other authors write. Imitate what you like and never stop practicing.
Good luck as you progress!
7Evil RiggsThis doesn't make much sense, truth be told. My main advice to you would be to slow down the action, making sure to describe the scenes, characters, and settings as you go. Really, the best way to achieve this (it's a tricky balance, to be sure) is to read other published fiction and see how other authors write. Imitate what you like and never stop practicing.
Good luck as you progress!