for Three Guys9/8/2011 c5 
24FireEdge
Grammar- and spelling-wise this chapter was very good. I can only remember seeing one or two typos off the top of my head. The flow of the chapter was also good.
Either way this chapter was very cute. Though I question whether Kaiba was in character or not. I know he has developed a soft spot for Serenity but I just can't see him being moved by chocolates (on a side note I feel like he's more of a dark chocolate person. White chocolate is so sweet...) Or ever saying "I love you". Its not to say that he doesn't love her, but I just feel like he'd never outright say it. He'd be more the type to show his love rather than saying it. Still, despite that, I did enjoy the chapter. There is always room for fluff whether or not it's in character or not haha.
24FireEdgeGrammar- and spelling-wise this chapter was very good. I can only remember seeing one or two typos off the top of my head. The flow of the chapter was also good.
Either way this chapter was very cute. Though I question whether Kaiba was in character or not. I know he has developed a soft spot for Serenity but I just can't see him being moved by chocolates (on a side note I feel like he's more of a dark chocolate person. White chocolate is so sweet...) Or ever saying "I love you". Its not to say that he doesn't love her, but I just feel like he'd never outright say it. He'd be more the type to show his love rather than saying it. Still, despite that, I did enjoy the chapter. There is always room for fluff whether or not it's in character or not haha.
9/7/2011 c4 FireEdge
Awwww, this was a cute chapter. Actually I really liked the descriptions in this chapter. They did a good job of showing her surroundings without being too long-winded at the same time. I also think the part with Serenity getting Kaiba's number was very cute and you pulled it off nicely.
The only thing I wanted to point out was that I thought that the transition after the shrine scene was a little abrupt. Also there were some grammatical mistakes involving commas. You have them placed in some funny spots. I also spotted a typo or two, but those aren't really a big deal. Anyway onto the next chapter, haha.
Awwww, this was a cute chapter. Actually I really liked the descriptions in this chapter. They did a good job of showing her surroundings without being too long-winded at the same time. I also think the part with Serenity getting Kaiba's number was very cute and you pulled it off nicely.
The only thing I wanted to point out was that I thought that the transition after the shrine scene was a little abrupt. Also there were some grammatical mistakes involving commas. You have them placed in some funny spots. I also spotted a typo or two, but those aren't really a big deal. Anyway onto the next chapter, haha.
9/2/2011 c6 YunaX2D
I can't wait for resignation. Thanks for the update, I can't wait for the last chapter. I wonder what gonna happen when they meet. I love the surprises he plans.
I hope you update soon, I can't wait! xD
I can't wait for resignation. Thanks for the update, I can't wait for the last chapter. I wonder what gonna happen when they meet. I love the surprises he plans.
I hope you update soon, I can't wait! xD
9/1/2011 c6 17K5Rakitan
I like how Seto down-plays his wealth. Also, I am looking forward to seeing the story from Seto's perspective!
17K5RakitanI like how Seto down-plays his wealth. Also, I am looking forward to seeing the story from Seto's perspective!
9/1/2011 c4 K5Rakitan
This was a cool chapter. Duke is such an arrogant jerk, lol! I can't stand it when guys overstay their welcome.
This was a cool chapter. Duke is such an arrogant jerk, lol! I can't stand it when guys overstay their welcome.
9/1/2011 c3 K5Rakitan
I think you did a good job with Tristan's character, but I also think that you took the easy way out by saying that Serenity did not love him back.
I think you did a good job with Tristan's character, but I also think that you took the easy way out by saying that Serenity did not love him back.
9/1/2011 c2 K5Rakitan
This is so good! It reminds me of when I was in middle school and full of fantasies. You did a really good job of capturing that mood. There's just something about your writing that radiates emotion without directly saying it.
This is so good! It reminds me of when I was in middle school and full of fantasies. You did a really good job of capturing that mood. There's just something about your writing that radiates emotion without directly saying it.
9/1/2011 c1 K5Rakitan
This is intriguing. I think that people can be more vulnerable and open when they are talking to someone they do not know (or do not think they know).
This is intriguing. I think that people can be more vulnerable and open when they are talking to someone they do not know (or do not think they know).
9/1/2011 c6 16Eun-Jung
I am so very pleased that you have finally updated~! And most definitely I wasn't disappointed by the new chapter.
To be honest, I tasted a hint of Peacewish-like elements in your story (most strongly in the first two chapters). But that's not a surprise, especially since Peacewish did inspire you. For me (oddly) it made your story all the more interesting because those bits really made your originality stand out-I could pick out your unique say about the Seto/Serenity pairing. And what great build-up you have between them!
With the formal looming ever nearer, what will happen between Serenity and Seto? It's killing me as a reader that I KNOW who Serenity's secret partner is...and she is going to be so shocked (great use of situational irony, by the way). But will it be good shock? Or bad shock? Has her opinion of Seto Kaiba changed enough that she'll accept him with an open mind when she sees her Seth? And the fact that he's treating Serenity so nicely and just loving on her like this will only make the surprise bigger. Does Seto have a plan to help ease Serenity into the idea that he's the Seto Kaiba? I sense some sweet setup for angsty conflict: oh, what a tease.
All in all, thank you for the fantastic read. I can't wait for the next update to see where all of this is heading. Hopefully by then I will be much better behaved and review promptly after you post. Until then, Happy Writing!
16Eun-JungI am so very pleased that you have finally updated~! And most definitely I wasn't disappointed by the new chapter.
To be honest, I tasted a hint of Peacewish-like elements in your story (most strongly in the first two chapters). But that's not a surprise, especially since Peacewish did inspire you. For me (oddly) it made your story all the more interesting because those bits really made your originality stand out-I could pick out your unique say about the Seto/Serenity pairing. And what great build-up you have between them!
With the formal looming ever nearer, what will happen between Serenity and Seto? It's killing me as a reader that I KNOW who Serenity's secret partner is...and she is going to be so shocked (great use of situational irony, by the way). But will it be good shock? Or bad shock? Has her opinion of Seto Kaiba changed enough that she'll accept him with an open mind when she sees her Seth? And the fact that he's treating Serenity so nicely and just loving on her like this will only make the surprise bigger. Does Seto have a plan to help ease Serenity into the idea that he's the Seto Kaiba? I sense some sweet setup for angsty conflict: oh, what a tease.
All in all, thank you for the fantastic read. I can't wait for the next update to see where all of this is heading. Hopefully by then I will be much better behaved and review promptly after you post. Until then, Happy Writing!
8/29/2011 c6 1DragonLuver67
I'm excited to see where you take this! Update soon, I'll be there to read it and Resignation =)
1DragonLuver67I'm excited to see where you take this! Update soon, I'll be there to read it and Resignation =)
8/20/2011 c5 12ViscountessKiera
Chocolate dragons, how adorable. I'm looking forward to your update, though I do find that the "I love you" from Seto was a little sudden, but then again I have a feeling that if he ever did get around to finally saying that to someone, he'd most likely be rather blunt about it. Well anyways, I'm enjoying the read so far.
12ViscountessKieraChocolate dragons, how adorable. I'm looking forward to your update, though I do find that the "I love you" from Seto was a little sudden, but then again I have a feeling that if he ever did get around to finally saying that to someone, he'd most likely be rather blunt about it. Well anyways, I'm enjoying the read so far.