for Ben and Rex: Same Heroes10/14/2012 c6 Guest
hey' generator rex are you crazy
hey' generator rex are you crazy
3/13/2012 c9 liliCartMan
Even if the episode Heroes united (?) really exist, and even if Vilgax doesn't seem to die in Ben 10 UA, aplease please don't delete this FF! Nor the other ones. I like your plots too much, even if your style isn't very rich
here's an errata CORRIGE for a review I left for "Young Heroes":
Heatblast, Ghostfreak/Overkill, Goop/Update, Diamondhead= Human Torch -
Heatblast, Ghostfreak/Overkill, Goop/Update, Diamondhead= Fantastic Four : a) Heatblast=Human Torch,
b)Ghostfreak/Overkill=Invisible Woman + Kitty Pride,
c)Goop (and Update)= Mr.ffantastic, Diamondhead= the Thing
and so many other cartoons and comics characters you could know
Even if the episode Heroes united (?) really exist, and even if Vilgax doesn't seem to die in Ben 10 UA, aplease please don't delete this FF! Nor the other ones. I like your plots too much, even if your style isn't very rich
here's an errata CORRIGE for a review I left for "Young Heroes":
Heatblast, Ghostfreak/Overkill, Goop/Update, Diamondhead= Human Torch -
Heatblast, Ghostfreak/Overkill, Goop/Update, Diamondhead= Fantastic Four : a) Heatblast=Human Torch,
b)Ghostfreak/Overkill=Invisible Woman + Kitty Pride,
c)Goop (and Update)= Mr.ffantastic, Diamondhead= the Thing
and so many other cartoons and comics characters you could know
2/25/2012 c8 
6KittlyAbz
It was a little fast... not that suspensful. Good concept though! I love the idea of Vilgax and Van Klise working together.
6KittlyAbzIt was a little fast... not that suspensful. Good concept though! I love the idea of Vilgax and Van Klise working together.
2/25/2012 c3 KittlyAbz
You use the word 'friend' a lot within the first few chapters... I know that this story is completed, but for future reference try to expand your vocabulary. (For example, instead of 'friend,' use 'companion,' or 'accomplis,' or something to that sort.)
You use the word 'friend' a lot within the first few chapters... I know that this story is completed, but for future reference try to expand your vocabulary. (For example, instead of 'friend,' use 'companion,' or 'accomplis,' or something to that sort.)
11/26/2011 c2 5roxxihearts
Okay I have to stop here. Your story is pretty cool! But uhm, you are having a bit of trouble with tense switching. As an example:
"What? Two EVOs?", Rex asked himself when he saw the giant EVO and the red bat like creature. "I should finished the big one, then the small one." he said by himself. He runs up to the giant wolf like EVO and uses the Smack Hands to finish it off. After Rex punches it some time, the giant wolf like EVO fell down unconscious.
In those sentences you went from past tense ("asked" "saw" and "said") to present tense ("runs" "uses" and "punches") and then went back to past tense ("fell").
I mean I like the story! It seems pretty cool, especially since i just watched the Ben 10/Gen Rex crossover tv show (so cool!). Anyway, I really hope you don't take this the wrong way or think I'm a flamer or something :S
5roxxiheartsOkay I have to stop here. Your story is pretty cool! But uhm, you are having a bit of trouble with tense switching. As an example:
"What? Two EVOs?", Rex asked himself when he saw the giant EVO and the red bat like creature. "I should finished the big one, then the small one." he said by himself. He runs up to the giant wolf like EVO and uses the Smack Hands to finish it off. After Rex punches it some time, the giant wolf like EVO fell down unconscious.
In those sentences you went from past tense ("asked" "saw" and "said") to present tense ("runs" "uses" and "punches") and then went back to past tense ("fell").
I mean I like the story! It seems pretty cool, especially since i just watched the Ben 10/Gen Rex crossover tv show (so cool!). Anyway, I really hope you don't take this the wrong way or think I'm a flamer or something :S
10/23/2011 c9 3annea101
kay i liked the basic plotline but...it was a bit randm i mean how'd van kliess and vilgax meet you just threw them in there.
also if their in the same universe wouldnt they know of each other you dont have any explination as to why they dont. there are a few other small plot holes but to me those were just blaring ones. no offense or anything (ever notice how saying things like no offence or no pressure just makes things worse?)
other then that it was good
3annea101kay i liked the basic plotline but...it was a bit randm i mean how'd van kliess and vilgax meet you just threw them in there.
also if their in the same universe wouldnt they know of each other you dont have any explination as to why they dont. there are a few other small plot holes but to me those were just blaring ones. no offense or anything (ever notice how saying things like no offence or no pressure just makes things worse?)
other then that it was good