5/17 c2 Guest
Please continue

10/9/2011 c1 16Gloxinia
This seems like a little story you could really expand on, and I hope you take my words in consideration. I started to cry, I have only watch 10 episodes but I have really grown to love Pudding.

I think you should include more details and not surround the story on mostly dialogue. Also you shouldn't write it as bang bang bang, just showing it as what goes in order makes it a little plain. But if you write it with emotion then all the better.

Those are just tips but I think it's till a cute story that made me cry, and I have to give you credit since I don't cry much on fanfictions.