for Saucy3/3/2012 c1 
68nannygirl
Another hidden gem I missed but am now so happy that I found :D
This was such a wonderfully, brilliantly written piece! It had just about everything! Amazing descriptions like this one here “The cold November air bites at her bare ankles. The sheer cloth of her pants are unforgiving in Wisconsin's autumn air. Her left hand betrays her body's cry for warmth, as she tilts the ice cold beer to help her lips to a long, satisfying gulp.” Had me feeling the chill!
It had mystery with us readers not knowing at first what has Donna so distant, who it is she’s thinking about. Loved that!
It was heartbreaking for both Donna having to go through this and Eric who is left in the dark.
It had a flashback! LOVE those and yours was terrifically done! It had a bit of romance, seriously your leading me to the dark, dark side! Lol It had humor, this line had me giggling a bit and I could hear it perfectly in Donna’s voice “Like I'm just doomed to be this bitter old lady gossiping about the neighbors and shooting out kids to entertain myself.” That whole last bit was so wonderfully sweet! Oh and great touch with the continues ‘Inhale. Exhale.’ Really liked that!
This was a fantastic story! You did such a fabulous job on it! Thank you for sharing! And keep up the terrific work!
68nannygirlAnother hidden gem I missed but am now so happy that I found :D
This was such a wonderfully, brilliantly written piece! It had just about everything! Amazing descriptions like this one here “The cold November air bites at her bare ankles. The sheer cloth of her pants are unforgiving in Wisconsin's autumn air. Her left hand betrays her body's cry for warmth, as she tilts the ice cold beer to help her lips to a long, satisfying gulp.” Had me feeling the chill!
It had mystery with us readers not knowing at first what has Donna so distant, who it is she’s thinking about. Loved that!
It was heartbreaking for both Donna having to go through this and Eric who is left in the dark.
It had a flashback! LOVE those and yours was terrifically done! It had a bit of romance, seriously your leading me to the dark, dark side! Lol It had humor, this line had me giggling a bit and I could hear it perfectly in Donna’s voice “Like I'm just doomed to be this bitter old lady gossiping about the neighbors and shooting out kids to entertain myself.” That whole last bit was so wonderfully sweet! Oh and great touch with the continues ‘Inhale. Exhale.’ Really liked that!
This was a fantastic story! You did such a fabulous job on it! Thank you for sharing! And keep up the terrific work!
2/28/2012 c1 xx nope. xx
Wow this is amazing! I love how well written it is because it has vivid detail! Very realistic, because many of us have had that moment where we needed to be out in the cold late at night to think about life. I love this! I also agree that her life would have turned out that way, had she married Eric.
Nice job again! :)
Wow this is amazing! I love how well written it is because it has vivid detail! Very realistic, because many of us have had that moment where we needed to be out in the cold late at night to think about life. I love this! I also agree that her life would have turned out that way, had she married Eric.
Nice job again! :)
2/25/2012 c1 19taylorswiftrox
"The guilt bears down her throat and into the deepest pits of her stomach where it churns and writhes trying to come back up. A verbal expression of unrealistic longing.
Something that can never come be.
And never should."
^^^
I LOVE those lines. You used perfect description and it's not just a simple sentence you could get out of no where. You used that a lot throughout the story and it really shows how much of a great writer you are.
"'Like I'm just doomed to be this bitter old lady gossiping about the neighbors and shooting out kids to entertain myself'"
^^^
That part was hilarious! And it's the typical storyline you'd expect to see on a TV show love it!
I love the mysteriousness of this story, how Donna is longing for something she could have had from the beginning but is now choosing another path. The ending lines were perfect also, I love that Donna is going into an unknown subconscious that only she knows and longs for constantly.
19taylorswiftrox"The guilt bears down her throat and into the deepest pits of her stomach where it churns and writhes trying to come back up. A verbal expression of unrealistic longing.
Something that can never come be.
And never should."
^^^
I LOVE those lines. You used perfect description and it's not just a simple sentence you could get out of no where. You used that a lot throughout the story and it really shows how much of a great writer you are.
"'Like I'm just doomed to be this bitter old lady gossiping about the neighbors and shooting out kids to entertain myself'"
^^^
That part was hilarious! And it's the typical storyline you'd expect to see on a TV show love it!
I love the mysteriousness of this story, how Donna is longing for something she could have had from the beginning but is now choosing another path. The ending lines were perfect also, I love that Donna is going into an unknown subconscious that only she knows and longs for constantly.
10/22/2011 c1 DFT
Yes, she is very saucy! She deserves better then both Eric or Hyde! Eric was portrayed too much of a nerd, and Hyde was another Leo in training!
Yes, she is very saucy! She deserves better then both Eric or Hyde! Eric was portrayed too much of a nerd, and Hyde was another Leo in training!