for Deadends2/5 c1 
15InLoveWithLaughing
Wow. It took me a few times to understand the way the numbers worked, but now that I do... wow.
The whole fic is beautiful, and you handled a delicate subject amazingly. The writing style is unique and almost poetry-sounding, really gorgeous. I take my hat off to you, one of the best fics I've ever read.
15InLoveWithLaughingWow. It took me a few times to understand the way the numbers worked, but now that I do... wow.
The whole fic is beautiful, and you handled a delicate subject amazingly. The writing style is unique and almost poetry-sounding, really gorgeous. I take my hat off to you, one of the best fics I've ever read.
4/5/2012 c1 84autumn midnights
This is really interesting! I don't think I've really read anything like this before - I've seen characters written with eating disorders, but the style of yours was very original and creative. It's a very unique writing style, that's for sure, and I think with some ideas it might not have worked, but with this one it really did. It was very well-written, also, and I didn't notice any spelling or grammar mistakes. Your take on Cho was extremely creative, as well, and you've given a new depth to her personality that we really don't see in the actual books. Good job on this.
84autumn midnightsThis is really interesting! I don't think I've really read anything like this before - I've seen characters written with eating disorders, but the style of yours was very original and creative. It's a very unique writing style, that's for sure, and I think with some ideas it might not have worked, but with this one it really did. It was very well-written, also, and I didn't notice any spelling or grammar mistakes. Your take on Cho was extremely creative, as well, and you've given a new depth to her personality that we really don't see in the actual books. Good job on this.
2/26/2012 c1 26Lavinia Swire
I’m trying to write a coherent review here, but all I can say is ‘Wow’. This is just incredible. I’ve never read a fic dealing with an eating disorder before because I’ve been worried about how it would be handled, but this is really striking and you write so beautifully. It took a couple of readings for me to work out the timeline, but it works fantastically and makes things even more heartbreaking having the ending at the beginning. Your writing style is stunning too, and the flow is almost dreamlike. I can’t really say I *enjoyed* reading because it’s just too heartbreaking, but it’s so lyrical and moving and powerful and gaaah. It’s probably one of the best things I’ve read on here. Wonderful job.
26Lavinia SwireI’m trying to write a coherent review here, but all I can say is ‘Wow’. This is just incredible. I’ve never read a fic dealing with an eating disorder before because I’ve been worried about how it would be handled, but this is really striking and you write so beautifully. It took a couple of readings for me to work out the timeline, but it works fantastically and makes things even more heartbreaking having the ending at the beginning. Your writing style is stunning too, and the flow is almost dreamlike. I can’t really say I *enjoyed* reading because it’s just too heartbreaking, but it’s so lyrical and moving and powerful and gaaah. It’s probably one of the best things I’ve read on here. Wonderful job.
2/21/2012 c1 76imagined-experiences
In advance, I apologise for the quality of the review I am going to give you. It'll never be as good as yours. Anyway.
I don't know why you are insure of this piece since it's genius. And very well written. You made me read Cho/Cédric, which is an exploit. You made her real and very vivid. You gave a layer to her character that we didn't see in the books, and that was very pleasant to read.
I find the idea you had to go backwards with the numbers going onward until Cedric's death very clever. It took me a while to see it, I had to re-read the fic, but that second read was very powerful.
I don't know where you had the idea of this scale, but it's brilliant. That first paragraph 00, is heartbreaking. (I imagine she is in a hospital, isn't she?)
I also loved how the vocabulary changed from the beginning to the end, how you 'unbroke' her. In the first part it's death and sadness. Emptiness and sickness, that appear with Cedric's mourning. It was a very strong thing.
And then there is that second part. You can see the clouds and the fog disappearing slowly. There is worries, but there is laughs too, giggles and desires SHe finds hope even if things aren't at the best. Something that didn't happen in that first part. It's quite striking, how her point of view on things change.
And that ending that is actually a beginning, a meeting! I adore it. It's even more heartbreaking because we know how it ends for her. All that promising things broken.
It was very innovative to read things in that order and having them rejoining in the middle, for Cedric's death. I loved how it wraps in the middle. It was like a second life starting for her, a life after/during her mourning.
"Contrary to what they believe, the grief hasn't quite consumed her... It has instead surrounded like a fog on all sides, separating her from everything but these words. Fog clears, but what it hides might not be what you want it to be."
That particular sentence caught me. It shows us her, clearly. Her emotions, her feelings in this first part are very well written. You did an amazing job. I don't know what you didn't like about this fic.
Fantastic job!
76imagined-experiencesIn advance, I apologise for the quality of the review I am going to give you. It'll never be as good as yours. Anyway.
I don't know why you are insure of this piece since it's genius. And very well written. You made me read Cho/Cédric, which is an exploit. You made her real and very vivid. You gave a layer to her character that we didn't see in the books, and that was very pleasant to read.
I find the idea you had to go backwards with the numbers going onward until Cedric's death very clever. It took me a while to see it, I had to re-read the fic, but that second read was very powerful.
I don't know where you had the idea of this scale, but it's brilliant. That first paragraph 00, is heartbreaking. (I imagine she is in a hospital, isn't she?)
I also loved how the vocabulary changed from the beginning to the end, how you 'unbroke' her. In the first part it's death and sadness. Emptiness and sickness, that appear with Cedric's mourning. It was a very strong thing.
And then there is that second part. You can see the clouds and the fog disappearing slowly. There is worries, but there is laughs too, giggles and desires SHe finds hope even if things aren't at the best. Something that didn't happen in that first part. It's quite striking, how her point of view on things change.
And that ending that is actually a beginning, a meeting! I adore it. It's even more heartbreaking because we know how it ends for her. All that promising things broken.
It was very innovative to read things in that order and having them rejoining in the middle, for Cedric's death. I loved how it wraps in the middle. It was like a second life starting for her, a life after/during her mourning.
"Contrary to what they believe, the grief hasn't quite consumed her... It has instead surrounded like a fog on all sides, separating her from everything but these words. Fog clears, but what it hides might not be what you want it to be."
That particular sentence caught me. It shows us her, clearly. Her emotions, her feelings in this first part are very well written. You did an amazing job. I don't know what you didn't like about this fic.
Fantastic job!
2/20/2012 c1 252Inkfire
It isn't bad. It really isn't bad - it's stunningly written… the timelines completely lost me at first, it took me AGES to tell that it was going backwards, and then I couldn't tell whether it was going backwards from the start or forward and then backward with the numbers - I'm a bit dumb, I guess - but it's not a bad thing, I mean the way the fic is built not me being dumb, because it made it seem all the more… eerie, a bit maze-like. You described the disorder really insightfully, chillingly, with small touches that made it so frightening and real, you really seemed to show the death within, if that makes sense. You described everything in a breath-taking way, your images were so haunting, everything seemed so vivid and yet so blurry. I especially loved the first part, of course - so striking - and most of all the first part 1, the way the grief takes over her life and how she's dealing with it. The part about sympathy was great insight as well, though. Slowly going back to when Cedric was alive felt really unnerving, and everything was really beautifully written at that point, too. The last paragraph was just perfect. This was… well, I can't define it, but I can define you and I call you gifted, an incredible author. Here's that =)
252InkfireIt isn't bad. It really isn't bad - it's stunningly written… the timelines completely lost me at first, it took me AGES to tell that it was going backwards, and then I couldn't tell whether it was going backwards from the start or forward and then backward with the numbers - I'm a bit dumb, I guess - but it's not a bad thing, I mean the way the fic is built not me being dumb, because it made it seem all the more… eerie, a bit maze-like. You described the disorder really insightfully, chillingly, with small touches that made it so frightening and real, you really seemed to show the death within, if that makes sense. You described everything in a breath-taking way, your images were so haunting, everything seemed so vivid and yet so blurry. I especially loved the first part, of course - so striking - and most of all the first part 1, the way the grief takes over her life and how she's dealing with it. The part about sympathy was great insight as well, though. Slowly going back to when Cedric was alive felt really unnerving, and everything was really beautifully written at that point, too. The last paragraph was just perfect. This was… well, I can't define it, but I can define you and I call you gifted, an incredible author. Here's that =)