for A Beethoven Nut's Jealousy4/16 c1 
1Mr. Grool
Wow SuperMew! Who said you weren't good with typing?
This was a really good Fanfiction, though a little short. As for grammar, I didn't see anything wrong. Great job!
-Mr. Grool
1Mr. GroolWow SuperMew! Who said you weren't good with typing?
This was a really good Fanfiction, though a little short. As for grammar, I didn't see anything wrong. Great job!
-Mr. Grool
7/6/2012 c1 2Digidestined Ninja of Sunshine
I wanted to see your stories considering you support mine. I have a love for peanuts too, my fav is Lucy. She's awesome. I like it. I never knew he had a jealous side either :)
2Digidestined Ninja of SunshineI wanted to see your stories considering you support mine. I have a love for peanuts too, my fav is Lucy. She's awesome. I like it. I never knew he had a jealous side either :)
6/17/2012 c1 14Madame Kasumi
Ooo I didn't know shroder was the jelose type eather. :) Pretty funny. I liked alot. Maby you could do like a chapter 2 or something.
14Madame KasumiOoo I didn't know shroder was the jelose type eather. :) Pretty funny. I liked alot. Maby you could do like a chapter 2 or something.
6/10/2012 c1 888Hawki
-."Look Schroeder I know..."
Somehow a full stop wormed its way in before "look."
-".Schroeder..."
And again.
-"You don't have to put up with Lucy anymore." said Charlie.
Should be a comma instead of a full stop after "anymore."
-Geez and they think I am scary thought Lucy.
Missing a comma after "scary."
-Overall, I feel this is kind of rushed. Dialogue boils down to point form almost and it switches to Charlie's POV without any breaker to indicate the shift. Also, there's a distinct lack of conjunctions that doesn't feel natural to the piece (e.g. "this is not going to end well" rather than "this isn't").
888Hawki-."Look Schroeder I know..."
Somehow a full stop wormed its way in before "look."
-".Schroeder..."
And again.
-"You don't have to put up with Lucy anymore." said Charlie.
Should be a comma instead of a full stop after "anymore."
-Geez and they think I am scary thought Lucy.
Missing a comma after "scary."
-Overall, I feel this is kind of rushed. Dialogue boils down to point form almost and it switches to Charlie's POV without any breaker to indicate the shift. Also, there's a distinct lack of conjunctions that doesn't feel natural to the piece (e.g. "this is not going to end well" rather than "this isn't").
5/25/2012 c1 9Cheap Toaster
This is a really good start to writing. Overall the writing was good, but you did make a few errors. For example, "Am I seeing things or is Lucy making a move on this new guy? "Does Schroeder even know we have new neighbors," whispered Charlie Brown." You would start a new paragraph after Charlie's thought process. About halfway through, you started forgetting to put a comma instead of a period, question mark, or explanation mark before the second quotation mark when someone said something. The only reason you would add in a period, question mark, or exclamation mark instead of a comma is if there's a full sentence on the other side of the second quotation mark (ex: "Is something wrong?" He asked as a concerned expression appeared on his face and he put a hand on his friend's shoulder.). You also missed some punctuation. A few things also sound a bit awkward when said aloud, so I recommend reading your story out loud, even if just whispering to yourself, once you've finished writing to make sure that nothing sounds awkward. If you don't have one already, I recommend finding a beta reader in order to be sure there are no mistakes in your writing. I really hope to see you grow as a writer and I will try to read future pieces you write.
9Cheap ToasterThis is a really good start to writing. Overall the writing was good, but you did make a few errors. For example, "Am I seeing things or is Lucy making a move on this new guy? "Does Schroeder even know we have new neighbors," whispered Charlie Brown." You would start a new paragraph after Charlie's thought process. About halfway through, you started forgetting to put a comma instead of a period, question mark, or explanation mark before the second quotation mark when someone said something. The only reason you would add in a period, question mark, or exclamation mark instead of a comma is if there's a full sentence on the other side of the second quotation mark (ex: "Is something wrong?" He asked as a concerned expression appeared on his face and he put a hand on his friend's shoulder.). You also missed some punctuation. A few things also sound a bit awkward when said aloud, so I recommend reading your story out loud, even if just whispering to yourself, once you've finished writing to make sure that nothing sounds awkward. If you don't have one already, I recommend finding a beta reader in order to be sure there are no mistakes in your writing. I really hope to see you grow as a writer and I will try to read future pieces you write.
4/16/2012 c1 supersexyghotmew95
I LOVE MY STORY I REALLY REALLY DO XD
I LOVE MY STORY I REALLY REALLY DO XD
4/15/2012 c1 some guy
Ha, nice. Are all the stories you write gonna be about Lucy and Schroeder though, i get the feeling from all the reviews you only care about stories about them. It would be nice if you wrote a story for Charlie Brown, or perhaps some of the other main characters. This site needs more Peanuts stories, doesn't it. Still a good job on your stories though, but you might want to check your grammer. Just trying to help, reviews are supposed to reccomend improvements.
Ha, nice. Are all the stories you write gonna be about Lucy and Schroeder though, i get the feeling from all the reviews you only care about stories about them. It would be nice if you wrote a story for Charlie Brown, or perhaps some of the other main characters. This site needs more Peanuts stories, doesn't it. Still a good job on your stories though, but you might want to check your grammer. Just trying to help, reviews are supposed to reccomend improvements.
3/15/2012 c1 3supersexyghotmew95
HA thaaaaat was fuuuuuuuuuuun I love ya mommy thanks for the edit XD
3supersexyghotmew95HA thaaaaat was fuuuuuuuuuuun I love ya mommy thanks for the edit XD