for Damaged Goods1/18 c1 luvgoround
This was so well written captured that whole fear of Mary's. Matthew was so perfect in this, in his usual self w fire and passion and tenderness and complete love for Mary. That is what love is - unconditional - loving each other - because none of us are perfect.
This was so well written captured that whole fear of Mary's. Matthew was so perfect in this, in his usual self w fire and passion and tenderness and complete love for Mary. That is what love is - unconditional - loving each other - because none of us are perfect.
8/29/2012 c1 
20princesstaranee
Oh, so adorable! I quite imagine them as great-grandparents, being laughed at by more modern, 'cool' great-grandchildren, without any thought for what they went through or how good they are together. They seem so real to me, especially in this fic.
20princesstaraneeOh, so adorable! I quite imagine them as great-grandparents, being laughed at by more modern, 'cool' great-grandchildren, without any thought for what they went through or how good they are together. They seem so real to me, especially in this fic.
8/27/2012 c1 A fan
Awwww, that was amazing! :) Really sweet...
Awwww, that was amazing! :) Really sweet...
8/14/2012 c1 4HideSeekKeep
This was a gorgeous take on what might happen should Mary's story get published. Mary's low opinion of herself broke my heart, but I'm so glad that Matthew's devotion and reassurance of his love made everything better. Great work!
4HideSeekKeepThis was a gorgeous take on what might happen should Mary's story get published. Mary's low opinion of herself broke my heart, but I'm so glad that Matthew's devotion and reassurance of his love made everything better. Great work!
6/13/2012 c1 1pamylz
Ahh! I love the emotions the writing the passion (why can't I italicize in reviews) and I especially love how this captures the deep essence of their feelings towards each other, Matthew's in particular. Glorious writing!
April
1pamylzAhh! I love the emotions the writing the passion (why can't I italicize in reviews) and I especially love how this captures the deep essence of their feelings towards each other, Matthew's in particular. Glorious writing!
April
3/31/2012 c1 17Chickwriter
OMG MATTHEW PUNCHING A WALL. YES YES YES THIS.
You write a brilliant Matthew, and his anger is so very real in this, so very understandable and every word he speaks, especially to Mary.. I can hear it so very clearly in his voice. Even "bollocks." :D
(Side note: Have strange idea that best auction item I can think of is Dan Stevens reading one of your fics on CD. Seriously, I would pay so much money for this, for any charity. Thud.)
Back to review. His outrage at her belief? Amazing. Sheer heaven. Perfect. And that it follows the "lived your life, lived mine" idea? *THUD.
On top of everything else, this feels.. effortless... in the best way possible. Can't wait for your next effort!
17ChickwriterOMG MATTHEW PUNCHING A WALL. YES YES YES THIS.
You write a brilliant Matthew, and his anger is so very real in this, so very understandable and every word he speaks, especially to Mary.. I can hear it so very clearly in his voice. Even "bollocks." :D
(Side note: Have strange idea that best auction item I can think of is Dan Stevens reading one of your fics on CD. Seriously, I would pay so much money for this, for any charity. Thud.)
Back to review. His outrage at her belief? Amazing. Sheer heaven. Perfect. And that it follows the "lived your life, lived mine" idea? *THUD.
On top of everything else, this feels.. effortless... in the best way possible. Can't wait for your next effort!
3/29/2012 c1 8Ultrahotpink
I love over protective Matthew! He's just so honorable and lovely! I admit that I wanted him to punch those assholes, but I sort of love him for not at the same time. I love the connection you've depicted between Matthew and Mary. Their mutual pain is so real. Wonderful fic!
8UltrahotpinkI love over protective Matthew! He's just so honorable and lovely! I admit that I wanted him to punch those assholes, but I sort of love him for not at the same time. I love the connection you've depicted between Matthew and Mary. Their mutual pain is so real. Wonderful fic!
3/27/2012 c1 1OnlyALouse
Oh! How beautiful! I loved it!
Thought your characterisation was absolutely fantastic and so very very realistic - I honestly don't know how you do it so well!
I particularly liked the part where Matthew sticks up for Mary in front of his colleagues but gets ever so angry - so very true and so wonderfully written! Angry!Matthew is perfect! And that 'nothing was more important than Mary' Oh my heart! :(
Of course she wouldn't be in her room :( I'd never have thought of that but its so obvious, so many horrible memories :(
The walled garden... :( Such a moving scene and finally finally they're able to get everything out in the open and argue and then everything is happy again - this is the sort of stuff I like very much! All the feelings are out there and they're so vulnerable but they love each other so much they can get past it and then everything is alright :)
I'm so glad you wrote this - if we don't get to see it in S3 then we've got this to go by, which is IMO a very accurate representation of it all! Absolutely brilliant! (but not helping my inferiority complex - nothing I write could ever be as good as this!) You're so very very fabulous and I loved it! :D
Alice x
1OnlyALouseOh! How beautiful! I loved it!
Thought your characterisation was absolutely fantastic and so very very realistic - I honestly don't know how you do it so well!
I particularly liked the part where Matthew sticks up for Mary in front of his colleagues but gets ever so angry - so very true and so wonderfully written! Angry!Matthew is perfect! And that 'nothing was more important than Mary' Oh my heart! :(
Of course she wouldn't be in her room :( I'd never have thought of that but its so obvious, so many horrible memories :(
The walled garden... :( Such a moving scene and finally finally they're able to get everything out in the open and argue and then everything is happy again - this is the sort of stuff I like very much! All the feelings are out there and they're so vulnerable but they love each other so much they can get past it and then everything is alright :)
I'm so glad you wrote this - if we don't get to see it in S3 then we've got this to go by, which is IMO a very accurate representation of it all! Absolutely brilliant! (but not helping my inferiority complex - nothing I write could ever be as good as this!) You're so very very fabulous and I loved it! :D
Alice x
3/27/2012 c1 2anonnynonny
I am always amazed at how well you capture their voices. I can hear Matthew and Mary (or should I say Dan and Michelle) through my laptop screen when you write them.
2anonnynonnyI am always amazed at how well you capture their voices. I can hear Matthew and Mary (or should I say Dan and Michelle) through my laptop screen when you write them.
3/26/2012 c1 smndolphin
Oh wow! Absolutely and utterly perfect. Ever since Mary has been referred to as damaged goods, first in S1, then again when she called herself that in CS in the conversation with Robert, it's enough to make you wonder how Matthew would feel about anyone, Mary included, using "damaged goods" to describe Mary, especially in light of everything that happened in the CS.
Really liked how you started off Matthew among strangers when the poop first hit the fan and the way that he was made aware of it. I could clearly see the varying emotions flittering across his face, confusion, shock, all culminating into a red haze induced rage. While it was hard to read, it was perfectly realistic to imagine that the way those men were reacting would likely be how others would and while a huge part of me wanted Matthew to knock that jerk Jackson's teeth in, part of why I love Matthew is that he didn't, but rather succinctly explained why he was infuriated and walked out before he lost what minor grip he still had on his temper.
One thing that has been made clear with Matthew since the beginning is that he clearly feels things very deeply and does not always do a good job of hiding them, which you showed brilliantly here. Of course, especially after the abominable way his colleagues behaved, the main thing that would be most important of all to Matthew would be to get to Mary, regardless of any personal consequences to himself. Loved how you showed how the train ride and switches would just drag on Matthew and how the time alone would not abate the anger, but keep it going on a slow boil as he had nothing but time, too much time, to think about all of it. You could almost feel the minutes feeling like hours when all he wanted was to be there for the woman he loved and all he could do was wait and the anger at the situation could do nothing but build. Really loved how when he finally reached Downton he didn't even think to stop by his own house, just sent his suitcase home and immediately made a bee-line for the Abbey.
It's a broken record at this point to tell you how much I love any interactions with Robert and Matthew, but will say it again. It was a brief scene, but loved how Robert wasted no times with pleasantries or platitudes re: what had brought Matthew home and told him where Mary might be. Poor darling, no I can't imagine she'd want to return to what might feel like the scene of the crime and would seek solace outside, where there'd be room to breathe. Really loved how Robert knew better than to even suggest that Matthew leave Mary be or the like, not just because the advice would have been summarily ignored, but because that was not what Mary needed. Matthew needed to see her, and Mary needed him. That's all there was to it.
Mary just broke my heart to pieces at the image of her sitting alone in a walled garden, and I could just see her mangling those poor daffodils, likely in a way she sees herself having been mangled all those years ago. As always, you have an amazing gift for truly finding the voice of the characters. Mary sincerely cares how she's perceived. She wishes she didn't, but she does. So of course all of her dirty laundry getting aired in such a public and clearly humiliating way, no matter how much she might have mentally prepared, would level her. When she saw Matthew, it made sense that she wouldn't immediately seek out his comfort because of that. Her initial reaction made me think of her first reaction when she told him the truth, "Say something, even if it's only goodbye." The sad truth is no one judges Mary more harshly than Mary judges herself, and seeing her sins in black and white would of course take her back to that dark place.
And then there's Matthew, and his reactions to all of this is breaking my heart for completely different reasons. He's simmering with anger he barely has under control, but all he wants to do is hold the woman he loves and at least try to make it better somehow. But she's holding him off and that just made me incredibly sad. He wants her to try and see that the words, those awful words, do not matter, not to him, but she can't hear it. And while it's obvious he's not angry at her, I loved how you perfectly showed that it was unacceptable to Matthew that anyone speak ill of Mary, including Mary herself, and all the anger he'd been sitting on for clearly the better of the day just comes out in this explosive burst which just amazing to behold. And then, Mary calls herself damaged goods and continues to say these terrible things about herself that she clearly believes and you can almost hear something in Matthew physically snap as those words play in his mind as he desperately tries to calm himself down, only to culminate in needing to physically release the anger somehow before he exploded, and I could just see Matthew in my head with the myriad of emotions running across his face and the punch coming almost involuntarily because the anger and rage had built up to a boiling point and there was nowhere left for it go. And poor Mary, despite being completely shellshocked in the face of a Matthew she'd never seen before, couldn't help but try to salve his physical wounds somehow, while still not quite comprehending how he not see her negatively. Absolutely loved Matthew's reaction when words were clearly not sinking in to grab her and show her in the best nonverbal way possible exactly what she was to him. Of course, how could she initially resist, and it broke my heart that partway through she still tried. And then Matthew reminded me why I loved him so by putting her fears to rest in the best way possible, by reminding her that what happened with Pamuk was before they fell in love, and yes, while it changed her, it made her the woman he ultimately fell in love with, and if that needed to happen for her to become the woman he was holding in his arms, then none of the it mattered. Absolutely beyond adored these last lines: "She, or the world, might believe her to be damaged goods. But to Matthew she was, and would always be, the most precious, priceless treasure, because she was Mary. And that was – and would always be – more than enough."
I hope on some level this conversation takes place in canon. For my own sake, I need for these two to show that now that they are together, NOTHING is ever going to tear them apart again. Absolutely wonderful work and thank you so so much for writing this!
Oh wow! Absolutely and utterly perfect. Ever since Mary has been referred to as damaged goods, first in S1, then again when she called herself that in CS in the conversation with Robert, it's enough to make you wonder how Matthew would feel about anyone, Mary included, using "damaged goods" to describe Mary, especially in light of everything that happened in the CS.
Really liked how you started off Matthew among strangers when the poop first hit the fan and the way that he was made aware of it. I could clearly see the varying emotions flittering across his face, confusion, shock, all culminating into a red haze induced rage. While it was hard to read, it was perfectly realistic to imagine that the way those men were reacting would likely be how others would and while a huge part of me wanted Matthew to knock that jerk Jackson's teeth in, part of why I love Matthew is that he didn't, but rather succinctly explained why he was infuriated and walked out before he lost what minor grip he still had on his temper.
One thing that has been made clear with Matthew since the beginning is that he clearly feels things very deeply and does not always do a good job of hiding them, which you showed brilliantly here. Of course, especially after the abominable way his colleagues behaved, the main thing that would be most important of all to Matthew would be to get to Mary, regardless of any personal consequences to himself. Loved how you showed how the train ride and switches would just drag on Matthew and how the time alone would not abate the anger, but keep it going on a slow boil as he had nothing but time, too much time, to think about all of it. You could almost feel the minutes feeling like hours when all he wanted was to be there for the woman he loved and all he could do was wait and the anger at the situation could do nothing but build. Really loved how when he finally reached Downton he didn't even think to stop by his own house, just sent his suitcase home and immediately made a bee-line for the Abbey.
It's a broken record at this point to tell you how much I love any interactions with Robert and Matthew, but will say it again. It was a brief scene, but loved how Robert wasted no times with pleasantries or platitudes re: what had brought Matthew home and told him where Mary might be. Poor darling, no I can't imagine she'd want to return to what might feel like the scene of the crime and would seek solace outside, where there'd be room to breathe. Really loved how Robert knew better than to even suggest that Matthew leave Mary be or the like, not just because the advice would have been summarily ignored, but because that was not what Mary needed. Matthew needed to see her, and Mary needed him. That's all there was to it.
Mary just broke my heart to pieces at the image of her sitting alone in a walled garden, and I could just see her mangling those poor daffodils, likely in a way she sees herself having been mangled all those years ago. As always, you have an amazing gift for truly finding the voice of the characters. Mary sincerely cares how she's perceived. She wishes she didn't, but she does. So of course all of her dirty laundry getting aired in such a public and clearly humiliating way, no matter how much she might have mentally prepared, would level her. When she saw Matthew, it made sense that she wouldn't immediately seek out his comfort because of that. Her initial reaction made me think of her first reaction when she told him the truth, "Say something, even if it's only goodbye." The sad truth is no one judges Mary more harshly than Mary judges herself, and seeing her sins in black and white would of course take her back to that dark place.
And then there's Matthew, and his reactions to all of this is breaking my heart for completely different reasons. He's simmering with anger he barely has under control, but all he wants to do is hold the woman he loves and at least try to make it better somehow. But she's holding him off and that just made me incredibly sad. He wants her to try and see that the words, those awful words, do not matter, not to him, but she can't hear it. And while it's obvious he's not angry at her, I loved how you perfectly showed that it was unacceptable to Matthew that anyone speak ill of Mary, including Mary herself, and all the anger he'd been sitting on for clearly the better of the day just comes out in this explosive burst which just amazing to behold. And then, Mary calls herself damaged goods and continues to say these terrible things about herself that she clearly believes and you can almost hear something in Matthew physically snap as those words play in his mind as he desperately tries to calm himself down, only to culminate in needing to physically release the anger somehow before he exploded, and I could just see Matthew in my head with the myriad of emotions running across his face and the punch coming almost involuntarily because the anger and rage had built up to a boiling point and there was nowhere left for it go. And poor Mary, despite being completely shellshocked in the face of a Matthew she'd never seen before, couldn't help but try to salve his physical wounds somehow, while still not quite comprehending how he not see her negatively. Absolutely loved Matthew's reaction when words were clearly not sinking in to grab her and show her in the best nonverbal way possible exactly what she was to him. Of course, how could she initially resist, and it broke my heart that partway through she still tried. And then Matthew reminded me why I loved him so by putting her fears to rest in the best way possible, by reminding her that what happened with Pamuk was before they fell in love, and yes, while it changed her, it made her the woman he ultimately fell in love with, and if that needed to happen for her to become the woman he was holding in his arms, then none of the it mattered. Absolutely beyond adored these last lines: "She, or the world, might believe her to be damaged goods. But to Matthew she was, and would always be, the most precious, priceless treasure, because she was Mary. And that was – and would always be – more than enough."
I hope on some level this conversation takes place in canon. For my own sake, I need for these two to show that now that they are together, NOTHING is ever going to tear them apart again. Absolutely wonderful work and thank you so so much for writing this!
3/26/2012 c1 12Tripp3235
Awwww. I'm so glad you brought up the damaged goods bit. I hate how society treated women back then. But Matthew, once he got over the shock, wouldn't be like that. And he'd defend her.
And I love how you wrote that it changed her and he loves her and he wouldn't change her because he fell in love with her and that's a wonderful thing to say.
Sigh.
And I hope it means something to you but I stopped reading Hunger Games to read this FF story.
12Tripp3235Awwww. I'm so glad you brought up the damaged goods bit. I hate how society treated women back then. But Matthew, once he got over the shock, wouldn't be like that. And he'd defend her.
And I love how you wrote that it changed her and he loves her and he wouldn't change her because he fell in love with her and that's a wonderful thing to say.
Sigh.
And I hope it means something to you but I stopped reading Hunger Games to read this FF story.
3/26/2012 c1 Maureen
This one shot was wonderful. One thing about Mary is a think she is a little to hard on herself. Maybe it's because we live in 2012, and her is from 20th England. I don't believe Mary should have to wear a figurative Scarlet Letter in her life. Matthew is taking her as she is now, and loves her unconditionally. May they enjoy their lives together. Well done.
Maureen
This one shot was wonderful. One thing about Mary is a think she is a little to hard on herself. Maybe it's because we live in 2012, and her is from 20th England. I don't believe Mary should have to wear a figurative Scarlet Letter in her life. Matthew is taking her as she is now, and loves her unconditionally. May they enjoy their lives together. Well done.
Maureen
3/26/2012 c1 Mareecee
Thank-you! Yes, I agree that a "damaged goods" story has long needed to be written. Mary and Matthew needed to have a proper conversation about it. Your version of it was excellent. Characters perfect (like always with you) and loved the Matthew and colleagues scene. Also loved how Mary picked away at the flower petals. I can see that as something she would do in such a circumstance... Also loved "she was, and would always be, the most precious, priceless treasure, because she was Mary. And that was – and would always be – more than enough." That is so true! Exactly how Matthew feels. You summed it up perfectly!
Thank-you! Yes, I agree that a "damaged goods" story has long needed to be written. Mary and Matthew needed to have a proper conversation about it. Your version of it was excellent. Characters perfect (like always with you) and loved the Matthew and colleagues scene. Also loved how Mary picked away at the flower petals. I can see that as something she would do in such a circumstance... Also loved "she was, and would always be, the most precious, priceless treasure, because she was Mary. And that was – and would always be – more than enough." That is so true! Exactly how Matthew feels. You summed it up perfectly!