for A Great Dream4/26/2012 c1 dyslexicteacher
I LOVE your stories! Great story. Nice details. You scold cheak out cassandra clarke immortal series. Did I mention that I am Aleisha reading teacher?(she told me about your writing!)
I LOVE your stories! Great story. Nice details. You scold cheak out cassandra clarke immortal series. Did I mention that I am Aleisha reading teacher?(she told me about your writing!)
4/4/2012 c1 
5Walking Through a Dream
I don't usually review in cases like this. This is a reasonably cute idea but the formatting error you've made makes it very difficult to read. Basically, there should be a new paragraph every time the dialogue switches between characters.
Example:
"Do you trust me, Dawn?" I ask.
"You know I do." She replied.
"Close you're eyes." I whisper. She did so and I removed my shirt and pants.
End example.
If you do this you'll probably get significantly more feedback as people actually make it to the end of you stories.
Good luck,
WiaD
5Walking Through a DreamI don't usually review in cases like this. This is a reasonably cute idea but the formatting error you've made makes it very difficult to read. Basically, there should be a new paragraph every time the dialogue switches between characters.
Example:
"Do you trust me, Dawn?" I ask.
"You know I do." She replied.
"Close you're eyes." I whisper. She did so and I removed my shirt and pants.
End example.
If you do this you'll probably get significantly more feedback as people actually make it to the end of you stories.
Good luck,
WiaD