for Sin and Love5/13 c50 
4owlhero
Thank you for finally getting around to jacob's dad. He is truly a man of faith by his answers but a parent also by the wave of different emotions he described to Jocab. So real, I know who has gone through a wave of emotions as a parent for something their kid told them. But you dont allow that faith to control him, you give a sense of letting his child choose of his own future anf loving him no matter what. Hopefully with God in the center of his life, of course.
I get a sense jacob will eventually treasure the time he spent with Sampson. If only it it was for the act of exploring his own life.
The question of a person's fate based on their actions is one that will always trouble people from now until the end of time. At least with Zeke being there for the service, there has to be some sense of comfort for Jacob. As for Men and Matt, at least they are in no immediate danger...
If we ever truly understood why things happened the way they did, life would be half as exciting. The poem was pretty good, considering I think it keeps Sampson's soul clean in a way with what he thought of life before his anger took over.
The song matched Sampson in some aspects and at the same time, gives a moral in its own way and weaves the beginning with the end,
I really love how you ended this. You did not give every answer but considering Ben's, Matt's and Jacob's lives are not over, their life journey is not either. Their journey of passions, soaring emotions and choices in their lives.
Of course the boy at the end, adds its own mysterious and leaves you opening.
Rebirth is my ever enxpanding story. My first layout had somewhere near thirty chapters and well, we are at the point and have not reached the climax yet... I'm nt sure that's because my mind is forcing to tell a story to something else. By the way I have some lost chapters too.
I did not know all of the charatcer's biblical background, so it was nice to know that.
4owlheroThank you for finally getting around to jacob's dad. He is truly a man of faith by his answers but a parent also by the wave of different emotions he described to Jocab. So real, I know who has gone through a wave of emotions as a parent for something their kid told them. But you dont allow that faith to control him, you give a sense of letting his child choose of his own future anf loving him no matter what. Hopefully with God in the center of his life, of course.
I get a sense jacob will eventually treasure the time he spent with Sampson. If only it it was for the act of exploring his own life.
The question of a person's fate based on their actions is one that will always trouble people from now until the end of time. At least with Zeke being there for the service, there has to be some sense of comfort for Jacob. As for Men and Matt, at least they are in no immediate danger...
If we ever truly understood why things happened the way they did, life would be half as exciting. The poem was pretty good, considering I think it keeps Sampson's soul clean in a way with what he thought of life before his anger took over.
The song matched Sampson in some aspects and at the same time, gives a moral in its own way and weaves the beginning with the end,
I really love how you ended this. You did not give every answer but considering Ben's, Matt's and Jacob's lives are not over, their life journey is not either. Their journey of passions, soaring emotions and choices in their lives.
Of course the boy at the end, adds its own mysterious and leaves you opening.
Rebirth is my ever enxpanding story. My first layout had somewhere near thirty chapters and well, we are at the point and have not reached the climax yet... I'm nt sure that's because my mind is forcing to tell a story to something else. By the way I have some lost chapters too.
I did not know all of the charatcer's biblical background, so it was nice to know that.
5/10 c49 owlhero
You're missing at least one word from your second line.
I have a mixed mind about Jacob's parents not telling about what really happened to Sampson. But I understand why they did not tell him so as to not affect his recovery but now there might be trust issues between all three of them. Add to the high probability jacob's father now knows about the relationship, it should add to the interesting times ahead.
"In a world of chaos and confusion, when rumors spread, the last lines of truth are made into a world of lies." That's really twisted.
How ironic is it that in my mind the two (still living) other icons of the story are the ones who might more are not available to help.
Its really sad how Jacob's conflict is rebooting itself because of Sampson's actions..
You're missing at least one word from your second line.
I have a mixed mind about Jacob's parents not telling about what really happened to Sampson. But I understand why they did not tell him so as to not affect his recovery but now there might be trust issues between all three of them. Add to the high probability jacob's father now knows about the relationship, it should add to the interesting times ahead.
"In a world of chaos and confusion, when rumors spread, the last lines of truth are made into a world of lies." That's really twisted.
How ironic is it that in my mind the two (still living) other icons of the story are the ones who might more are not available to help.
Its really sad how Jacob's conflict is rebooting itself because of Sampson's actions..
4/14 c48 owlhero
I understand your worries about upsetting other people but you've always had people thinking back to the very beginning of your writing, so why should you stop here?
By the way, this has to be the longest chapter you've ever posted.
Its amazing how you flipped the famous Good Samaritan story on its head like that and made us look at it from a different viewpoint. I never thought of it that way.
It seems Eli is in the same vein as Jacob was.
"but did the sins of the many mean the sin of the one wasn't so great? Was that even a sin?" Thoought provoking but the answer is no to the first, yes to the second. But the impact of the sin is still there inside the person who did and s/he did it to.
Its just amazing how quickly you fall from your previous position. The proverbs 10:13 can be interpreted as Wisdom can on the lips of those who can right and wrong but punishment on who can't. The huge problem is there is not clear black and white in this situation especially our supposed wisdom is affect by those around us. If there are not wise, then how are we?
The core question I think Eli is asking is there pure judgment from God? An infallable word or sentence that cant be misintrepreted.
Well I'll be...Ben and Matt are the gentle connection between Eli and Jacob maybe that situation will be bring some common ground between the two. The custody seems to have an uneal ending but perhaps a happy one.
Poor Sampson. how the good in people can be destroyed by an act driven to an end, previously never imagined. Between Rightousness and Guilty, the choice is almost impossible until emotion gets in the way. I love the logical side of him keep strying to fight back.
The constant questions are all too human and you write him extremely well in this situation. Wow a moltov cocktail. Lots of research I bet.
This chapter could be read over and over and come with different answers every single time you read with a different emotional mindset.
"Can you tell the difference when you're blinded by passion? Can you spot a lie when you're drowning in doctrine?" I would say for most of us, probably not for both.
Having the gun appear darker than most gives an element of evil tot he situation, of what a weapon like that usually does.
I admit you did a fantstic job trying to detail his thoughts for his mental destabilization.
Talk about flip scultpture on its head..."Who some would say was crazy, a man who deserved to die, Would be the savior of the world. Salvation comes from the darkest of places. Judgment comes from the most depraved hearts. And light, is shunned by the ones who see it most." How easy it is to do so.
I had to stop myself from writing as I was reading the church and its a good thing I did. Am I the only who thought od his own mother whne they think of Mary? The lamb and the shepherd idea
is haunting because of the way children do tend to follow their parents opinions on things. At least until they hit young adulthood.
Book of Jude is definitely not one of the more popular books in the Bible. I ahd not heard of it until now. Its intriguing how Trevor compares jacob's actions to Sodom and Gomorrah. Quite a dramatic similie. Its interesting how he focuses on the selfisness of human nature. Even a priest, he's unforgivening.
I do feel pity for the priest though but not a whole lot. I love the details you pit with the injuries and the color.
I get an imagery of the church in hell with the fire. Like christianity itself is being put to the test or trying to be snuffed out.
Poor Ben, a guardian angel perhaps? To be saved, only to be caught in the crossfire.
How ironic is it that two children of God fall injuried or death because of the same indirect weapon: Hate.
But at the same time, Sampson attempt to save one he knew was not at fault. I have such mixed feelings about him.
I expected nor wanted a happy ending. I wanted one that fits.
I understand your worries about upsetting other people but you've always had people thinking back to the very beginning of your writing, so why should you stop here?
By the way, this has to be the longest chapter you've ever posted.
Its amazing how you flipped the famous Good Samaritan story on its head like that and made us look at it from a different viewpoint. I never thought of it that way.
It seems Eli is in the same vein as Jacob was.
"but did the sins of the many mean the sin of the one wasn't so great? Was that even a sin?" Thoought provoking but the answer is no to the first, yes to the second. But the impact of the sin is still there inside the person who did and s/he did it to.
Its just amazing how quickly you fall from your previous position. The proverbs 10:13 can be interpreted as Wisdom can on the lips of those who can right and wrong but punishment on who can't. The huge problem is there is not clear black and white in this situation especially our supposed wisdom is affect by those around us. If there are not wise, then how are we?
The core question I think Eli is asking is there pure judgment from God? An infallable word or sentence that cant be misintrepreted.
Well I'll be...Ben and Matt are the gentle connection between Eli and Jacob maybe that situation will be bring some common ground between the two. The custody seems to have an uneal ending but perhaps a happy one.
Poor Sampson. how the good in people can be destroyed by an act driven to an end, previously never imagined. Between Rightousness and Guilty, the choice is almost impossible until emotion gets in the way. I love the logical side of him keep strying to fight back.
The constant questions are all too human and you write him extremely well in this situation. Wow a moltov cocktail. Lots of research I bet.
This chapter could be read over and over and come with different answers every single time you read with a different emotional mindset.
"Can you tell the difference when you're blinded by passion? Can you spot a lie when you're drowning in doctrine?" I would say for most of us, probably not for both.
Having the gun appear darker than most gives an element of evil tot he situation, of what a weapon like that usually does.
I admit you did a fantstic job trying to detail his thoughts for his mental destabilization.
Talk about flip scultpture on its head..."Who some would say was crazy, a man who deserved to die, Would be the savior of the world. Salvation comes from the darkest of places. Judgment comes from the most depraved hearts. And light, is shunned by the ones who see it most." How easy it is to do so.
I had to stop myself from writing as I was reading the church and its a good thing I did. Am I the only who thought od his own mother whne they think of Mary? The lamb and the shepherd idea
is haunting because of the way children do tend to follow their parents opinions on things. At least until they hit young adulthood.
Book of Jude is definitely not one of the more popular books in the Bible. I ahd not heard of it until now. Its intriguing how Trevor compares jacob's actions to Sodom and Gomorrah. Quite a dramatic similie. Its interesting how he focuses on the selfisness of human nature. Even a priest, he's unforgivening.
I do feel pity for the priest though but not a whole lot. I love the details you pit with the injuries and the color.
I get an imagery of the church in hell with the fire. Like christianity itself is being put to the test or trying to be snuffed out.
Poor Ben, a guardian angel perhaps? To be saved, only to be caught in the crossfire.
How ironic is it that two children of God fall injuried or death because of the same indirect weapon: Hate.
But at the same time, Sampson attempt to save one he knew was not at fault. I have such mixed feelings about him.
I expected nor wanted a happy ending. I wanted one that fits.
3/19 c47 owlhero
What eerie timing for the angel...Is it the Angie I'm thinking of? lol
I would be surprised if God came into a form we would understand. After if we understand the form, we wont understand the message.
I know I would not believe it if I were in this situation at first.
It seems as jacob could find some answers from what this angel told him. She seems very grounded or intentionally mysterious with her limited knowledge of God's ways but complete faith in them.
"My words mean nothing if your heart isn't ready to accept the truth in those." I will take that as the lesson from this chapter. Whatever you are involved in, if your heart's not in it, you can and probably will fail in some way.
What eerie timing for the angel...Is it the Angie I'm thinking of? lol
I would be surprised if God came into a form we would understand. After if we understand the form, we wont understand the message.
I know I would not believe it if I were in this situation at first.
It seems as jacob could find some answers from what this angel told him. She seems very grounded or intentionally mysterious with her limited knowledge of God's ways but complete faith in them.
"My words mean nothing if your heart isn't ready to accept the truth in those." I will take that as the lesson from this chapter. Whatever you are involved in, if your heart's not in it, you can and probably will fail in some way.
3/19 c46 owlhero
The mix between jacob's disorientation, and his thoughts was good here. Especially since he nothing else to do but think and suffer from pain.
"He closed his eyes trying to hide from the pain, and the flaming explosion that seemed to wrap around his head. Through closed eyelids his vision turned red, like the inside of his eyelids were covered in blood. He opened his eyes again, the room through distorted coming back into view. He tried moving his hand to press the call nurse button, though he wasn't able to reach it before his arm's strength failed him, the limb falling limp beside him" -It seems painful but sounds almost an internal hell.
I was definitely surprised to hear Zeke's backstory but it shows you Jacob is not totally alone even if some of the support is not obvious. Especially since he thought he thought he would thrown out of the church. The perfect mentor.
I find amazing how Jacob always gets thrown for a loop when it comes to religious questions. Almost as if you want the reader to figure for themselves as well.
Context is everything...especially laws and crimes.
The mix between jacob's disorientation, and his thoughts was good here. Especially since he nothing else to do but think and suffer from pain.
"He closed his eyes trying to hide from the pain, and the flaming explosion that seemed to wrap around his head. Through closed eyelids his vision turned red, like the inside of his eyelids were covered in blood. He opened his eyes again, the room through distorted coming back into view. He tried moving his hand to press the call nurse button, though he wasn't able to reach it before his arm's strength failed him, the limb falling limp beside him" -It seems painful but sounds almost an internal hell.
I was definitely surprised to hear Zeke's backstory but it shows you Jacob is not totally alone even if some of the support is not obvious. Especially since he thought he thought he would thrown out of the church. The perfect mentor.
I find amazing how Jacob always gets thrown for a loop when it comes to religious questions. Almost as if you want the reader to figure for themselves as well.
Context is everything...especially laws and crimes.
3/10 c45 owlhero
At least you starting to show the wholeness of Eli's character. Its just seems Eli is questioning his own faith as well. But I wonder what path you are going to take him? To top it off, it was not due to a feeling or impulse but a choice made it even worse.
Eli's definitely different than Jacob. he forced himself to be truthful with what he saw to jacob. Especially since he saw the human not the sin. Nice job contrasting Jacob and Taylor.
Sampson has changed from what he was earlier. I wonder where you going to take Sampson next? Its just amazing how contrasted Eli's thoughts about gays and Sampson's about the church. I mean both different circumstances but same variable, the human one, with both going in opposite directions.
I understand his rage about just standing aside and watching it happen and get involved. Oh boy I do like where this is going. Its gonna get violent...
At least you starting to show the wholeness of Eli's character. Its just seems Eli is questioning his own faith as well. But I wonder what path you are going to take him? To top it off, it was not due to a feeling or impulse but a choice made it even worse.
Eli's definitely different than Jacob. he forced himself to be truthful with what he saw to jacob. Especially since he saw the human not the sin. Nice job contrasting Jacob and Taylor.
Sampson has changed from what he was earlier. I wonder where you going to take Sampson next? Its just amazing how contrasted Eli's thoughts about gays and Sampson's about the church. I mean both different circumstances but same variable, the human one, with both going in opposite directions.
I understand his rage about just standing aside and watching it happen and get involved. Oh boy I do like where this is going. Its gonna get violent...
3/10 c44 owlhero
The constant confusion about jacob's memory is needed tomake this seem real. Sampson's small gestures shows how much he cares considering how much unnecessary guilt he is suffering from.
I actually like how you describe Jacob's body reacting to all the movement. Anyone who has visited a hospital or even stayed in one knows it naturally feels like a prison just by pure function.
jacob's myrad of worries just makes the situation worse for his healing. Yeah nobody wants to be to stuck at a hospital during the holidays.
The constant confusion about jacob's memory is needed tomake this seem real. Sampson's small gestures shows how much he cares considering how much unnecessary guilt he is suffering from.
I actually like how you describe Jacob's body reacting to all the movement. Anyone who has visited a hospital or even stayed in one knows it naturally feels like a prison just by pure function.
jacob's myrad of worries just makes the situation worse for his healing. Yeah nobody wants to be to stuck at a hospital during the holidays.
3/10 c43 owlhero
I was not sure what the first scene was about until I realized it could be Jacob's mind signaling a wakeup call to himself or an illusion of an ordinary event for his mind to latch onto to stablize itself. Either way it was funny considering we've had the same thoughts when we were younger or drunk.
The conflicting description between the pain and the soothing artifical environment is striking. Especially when I am thinking he has a concussion or head trauma. What caught me by surprise was his practically zero body control. That is until Sampson mentioned the coma. How scary that must be.
I was not sure what the first scene was about until I realized it could be Jacob's mind signaling a wakeup call to himself or an illusion of an ordinary event for his mind to latch onto to stablize itself. Either way it was funny considering we've had the same thoughts when we were younger or drunk.
The conflicting description between the pain and the soothing artifical environment is striking. Especially when I am thinking he has a concussion or head trauma. What caught me by surprise was his practically zero body control. That is until Sampson mentioned the coma. How scary that must be.
2/26 c42 owlhero
While short but wonderfully to the point. Still it told a lot.
I wondered why you created Eli and now I may have found at least part of the answer. The book of Ezekiel...wonder if it will come up again?
At least now we know where one of the voices came from but it seems as though Eli might changed by this. Creative job not showing the pastor's opinions in an obvious manner. Okay I suppose the the second unknown voice is Sampson then?
While short but wonderfully to the point. Still it told a lot.
I wondered why you created Eli and now I may have found at least part of the answer. The book of Ezekiel...wonder if it will come up again?
At least now we know where one of the voices came from but it seems as though Eli might changed by this. Creative job not showing the pastor's opinions in an obvious manner. Okay I suppose the the second unknown voice is Sampson then?
2/26 c41 owlhero
I guess you were right about the church but its not what I expected. Using the weather as foreshadowing and a possible religious symbol was a good artistic choice.
Where the lyrics(?) come from?
The whole scene was short, violent and not over the top. There's no poetry at all but just the strikes of those unknown homophobes. I liked how you showed Jacob's violent side. It was primal. The haziness when it comes to the strikes on Jacob made it better. A pure ambush. Plain and simple.
The ending drew my interest. Better read the next one quickly.
I guess you were right about the church but its not what I expected. Using the weather as foreshadowing and a possible religious symbol was a good artistic choice.
Where the lyrics(?) come from?
The whole scene was short, violent and not over the top. There's no poetry at all but just the strikes of those unknown homophobes. I liked how you showed Jacob's violent side. It was primal. The haziness when it comes to the strikes on Jacob made it better. A pure ambush. Plain and simple.
The ending drew my interest. Better read the next one quickly.
2/15 c40 owlhero
I was wondering how you were going to put this out. With jaocb taking baby steps as it were towards his identity.
The club description is definitely creative. This new environment with all its "odd" sights should change Jacob dramatically.
I definitely see why you pointed how no one knew Cole was gay...Okay the attempt at dancing drew a laugh only if becuase it was their first. The song is not the normal thing I see on here. Some philsiophical tones in it. Definitely different.
"Joy wasn't the absence of pain, it was a hope that pain could not steel." Provoking idea...
With the smoke, its almost as if everyone was in daze. Either from the smoke or from the emotions.
As for Robert, I can see massive unpredictability. I can see why sampson may have left him or had the time of his life. Okay Robert shocked me a little. He does not have a boundary, does he?
The penguin always finds his way into a story, somehow...
Foreshadowing with the church perhaps?
I was wondering how you were going to put this out. With jaocb taking baby steps as it were towards his identity.
The club description is definitely creative. This new environment with all its "odd" sights should change Jacob dramatically.
I definitely see why you pointed how no one knew Cole was gay...Okay the attempt at dancing drew a laugh only if becuase it was their first. The song is not the normal thing I see on here. Some philsiophical tones in it. Definitely different.
"Joy wasn't the absence of pain, it was a hope that pain could not steel." Provoking idea...
With the smoke, its almost as if everyone was in daze. Either from the smoke or from the emotions.
As for Robert, I can see massive unpredictability. I can see why sampson may have left him or had the time of his life. Okay Robert shocked me a little. He does not have a boundary, does he?
The penguin always finds his way into a story, somehow...
Foreshadowing with the church perhaps?
2/13 c39 owlhero
"A world without color can be opened up to a world of wonder with just a simple light." Love that line and it details how much a loving relationship can change a person's view on everything.
Okay...Azaiah completely threw me here as I am sure he did you as well...
"A world without color can be opened up to a world of wonder with just a simple light." Love that line and it details how much a loving relationship can change a person's view on everything.
Okay...Azaiah completely threw me here as I am sure he did you as well...
2/13 c38 owlhero
The relationship really shows itself here especially the strength and the helplessness. Choosing now to have a little look on this was curious timing at first. But Sampson did have time to do it. How he is now the one doing the supporting unlike the last time...
The momentary amesnia was actually comforting to me, almost like a gift from god. Until it all came back that is.
Wow, the father comment makes how you intend this to go from a simple independent guy making a deciosn or to a father throwing his son? The questions he has are all the more destructive and scarring.
One possible step down the slope for yung Jacob...
The relationship really shows itself here especially the strength and the helplessness. Choosing now to have a little look on this was curious timing at first. But Sampson did have time to do it. How he is now the one doing the supporting unlike the last time...
The momentary amesnia was actually comforting to me, almost like a gift from god. Until it all came back that is.
Wow, the father comment makes how you intend this to go from a simple independent guy making a deciosn or to a father throwing his son? The questions he has are all the more destructive and scarring.
One possible step down the slope for yung Jacob...
2/13 c37 owlhero
I love how you pulled this off. The focus on Jacob's music leaving the outside as an almost nonentity here was great.
Sampson being the constant support, pillar right here. While at the same time, sampson is not completely trashing the religious part of Jacob's life or taking advantaage of the situation. It seems like you gave the church some fallable human qualitiy with Jacob's mental arguing.
Wonderful poetic way in showing Jacob's crying.
LOL Lord of the Rings reference. Mordor. Saw the hobbit just before writing this by chance?
I love how you pulled this off. The focus on Jacob's music leaving the outside as an almost nonentity here was great.
Sampson being the constant support, pillar right here. While at the same time, sampson is not completely trashing the religious part of Jacob's life or taking advantaage of the situation. It seems like you gave the church some fallable human qualitiy with Jacob's mental arguing.
Wonderful poetic way in showing Jacob's crying.
LOL Lord of the Rings reference. Mordor. Saw the hobbit just before writing this by chance?
2/13 c36 owlhero
Okay I admit this took a turn that was not on the top of my ideas for the future of the story. But I think its strikes the hardest with Jacob's love of music and his position on the church. Its just ironic that here Jacob thought he was safe with his mom knowing...but people tend to believe what they hear and his world has started to fall apart from more than one side now.
But I wonder about Simon? You dont drop something in for no reason?
His relationship with matt could turn even more difficult with the church relationship as a result of his "outing". Matt's life is so messed up. His thoughts about sometimes pushing God to the side has me wondering?: How many of us (inluding me) do that and do we do it intentionally or by accident?
The phrase about truth setting you free has a double menaing here between the secrecy and his "old" life. Sampson here could be a blessing or just public confirmation of the whole thing. Which could lead to something worse..
I swear the moral/theme of this whole story has to be: Which do you believe?: a book of text or your own heart? Considering thr Bible or any religious text is/can a matter of reader's interpretation its a valid question.
Okay I admit this took a turn that was not on the top of my ideas for the future of the story. But I think its strikes the hardest with Jacob's love of music and his position on the church. Its just ironic that here Jacob thought he was safe with his mom knowing...but people tend to believe what they hear and his world has started to fall apart from more than one side now.
But I wonder about Simon? You dont drop something in for no reason?
His relationship with matt could turn even more difficult with the church relationship as a result of his "outing". Matt's life is so messed up. His thoughts about sometimes pushing God to the side has me wondering?: How many of us (inluding me) do that and do we do it intentionally or by accident?
The phrase about truth setting you free has a double menaing here between the secrecy and his "old" life. Sampson here could be a blessing or just public confirmation of the whole thing. Which could lead to something worse..
I swear the moral/theme of this whole story has to be: Which do you believe?: a book of text or your own heart? Considering thr Bible or any religious text is/can a matter of reader's interpretation its a valid question.