I'm going to take a break from The Good and the Bad for a while and get back to DracoPansy for a while. I haven't been paying much attention to them lately and I think they deserve it, for these two have their own little place in my heart right next to the DracoHermione spot. :)
Anyway, I'll try to update The Good and the Bad soon, and hope you enjoy this oneshot. It has highly implied DracoHermione in it, just for a note. The story is told in Pansy's point of view.
Was this a way of making fun of me?
I sat in an antique white chair like everyone else did, but I chose to sit in the very back. If I, Pansy Parkinson, were to sit in the front, it just wouldn't work for me. Crying was not the solution to everything, or one might say, most things. During our school years, I was never the girl to catch his attention; I was more of the girl who longed for it.
But with even a single moment he spent to glance at me with his piercing gray eyes, I was too scared to remain still to the end. I always looked away. You may call it love at first sight, but there was more to that. Much more than you can imagine.
Our parents introduced us before we even started attending Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry; we were both cheerful seven year olds. As with everyone, there had to be some point in their lives where they were innocent, am I correct? It happened to be my seventh birthday the day the both of us met in Parkinson Manor.
That day my mother dressed me in my best clothing I've had at the time - a black satin dress with match buckle shoes. My hair was silky and dark like it has always been, and my skin the color of a pale spring's dawn. I refused to wear even the slightest bit of makeup when I was younger, so my face was presented like it always has been. Call it a chilidish element, but back then I knew that the moment I saw Draco I had fallen into the binding spell of love.
Throughout our school years, I've known that Draco looked at me as a friend and nothing else more. Of course, I've felt different, but I never told him my true confessions for I thought that would have a major impact on how he would look at me. Would he still act the same around me? Or would he act troubled?
Although he has been acting strange, it wasn't long until I found out why. It was one fateful day in the Slytherin Common Room after dinner and right before bed. Millicent, Theodore, Miles, Daphne and I were all growing tired and desperate to rest our heads on the pillows that awaited us until Draco arrived.
"Where have you been, Draco?" Daphne asked, concerned. I didn't want to speak and I chose to wait and figure it out myself.
"Detention," he said absent-mindedly as he plopped himself on a couch next to Theodore and I. He yawned and slouched in his seat, shifting his weight from one side to another.
"That late?" Millicent questioned. Miles broke into a silent laughing fit like he knew the whole story behind Draco's frustration. It began to occur to me that Draco hasn't spoken to me the whole day - was it something I did? "What did you do in Potions this time, Draco?"
Draco smirked. "Just played a little trick on Potter during Transfiguration, is all. Nothing big."
Theodore raised and eyebrow and I nudged him to tell me, for obviously I wasn't understanding anythere here. He just turned to me and ignored it, and everyone faced Miles, who was clearing his throat numerous times for attention.
"Really," Miles said, snickering. He crossed his arms and leaned closer as everyone except Draco and I turned towards him to pay close attention. "You sure you're not making up another lame excuse like last time, Draco? I can see right through you after several times."
Lame excuse? What was he talking about.
Draco shot him a nasty glare and then cocked his head in my direction. Was it just me or was he telling Miles to shut up for my sake? What was he hiding from me?
"What on earth are you talking about, Miles?" Daphne groaned as she teasingly bopped him on the head. "You're not making any sense!"
"Haven't you heard?" Miles spoke out to the world before his eyes turned to Draco. "Oh come on, Draco, don't tell me you've been hiding the fact you're going out with Granger from everyone else! Was it just me you've told?"
An uncomfortable silence hovered over us as numerous, shocked expressions lay permanently flat on everyone but Draco's face. Daphne and Millicent quietly turned to me and gave me an apologetic, pityful look, for they were the only ones I've told about my real feelings for him.
"...No way," Theodore mumbled.
No one spoke. And since no one did, I thought it would be only right if I began talking.
"...What?" I said with an undertone.
Everyone instantly turned their heads and shrugged, except Draco. He looked down, his platinmum blonde hair looming over his eyes and shadowing his pale skin. I was glad that Theodore was sitting in-between me and Draco, for I couldn't stand staying completely still, even now.
"...How long have you been hiding this from her, Draco?" Daphne asked him, anger rising up to his voice. Millicent grew tense and I refused to look at them directly, instead just burrowing my face into a cushion on the couch. "Huh?"
"It's none of your business, Greengrass!" he snapped as he violently rose from his seat, some blood rushing through his face. "Just because I haven't told Pansy about this, doesn't mean you can-"
"Shut up! Draco, don't you realize how clueless you are? How can you just hide this from Pansy?" Millicent butted in, crossing her arms and her eyes widening.
"Don't tell me to shut up, you-" Draco began.
"Stop it." I said, my voice muffled from the cushion.
"...What?" Daphne's voice morphed from viperous to sweet and understanding. I could hear Daphne and Millicent's footsteps creep closer as one of them kneeled in front of me. And although my head was still flat down on the pillow, I can feel Draco's piercing glare staring down at me.
"Stop it..." I repeated.
"Pansy, you'll be fine," Miles said carelessly.
"We can talk later, if you want," Millicent insisted.
"Pansy, are you okay?" Daphne asked as she caressed one of my shoulders.
"Is she crying?" I heard Theordore whisper to Millicent, who scoffed afterwards.
This was enough for me to handle at the moment. I was sobbing silently but I can feel the cushion gradually soaking up as the feeling of the moist cloth against my skin sent a weird tickling sensation on my skin. My feet went numb and I felt my heart drop as I endured great pain.
But when he spoke, all Hell broke loose.
"...Pansy?" Draco's voice seemed to echo endlessly as it rang through my ears.
"I said STOP IT!" I screamed as I flew off the couch, throwing the cushion on the floor harshly and slamming the door of the Girl's Dormitory before leaping into my bed, crying that night.
"...Now look what you've done," I heard Millicent snarl at Miles and Draco before I covered my ears with my pillow.
For the rest of the year, Draco and I didn't speak. I still loved him however - the real trick was trying to get over him. I should've known that I could never be his girl. All those wonderful times we've had; teasing Potter and his crew, the Yule Ball, ditching class and drinking endless cups of Firewhisky - was it all just a lie? How hard was it for me just to tell him three words? Three, simple words?
But I gave up. Here I sat now, in the back of the row of seats lined up for Draco and Granger's wedding. They were both standing in the front happily as the priest neared to the end of their speech. Never in my life did I ever see Draco so happy. Not even when he taught me how to play a trick on Potter on my own or when I let him copy my Potions homework. How I longed to see him flash that smile upon me; for years now.
He had a great impact on my life. He was the one that drilled the forbiddance of Purebloods and Mudbloods into my head. Has Granger turned him into some hypocrite? He was the only person who made me feel beautiful. He said I've grown out of my 'pug-like' face and seemed to be the only one who complimented my frilly pink robes at the Yule Ball.
Tears started rolling down my cheeks. I tried to hide them by quickly wiping them away, but the old woman sitting next to me seemed to notice.
"What's wrong, dear?"
"...Nothing," I replied, hoping she would mind her own business.
When it came to the I-Do's, I played close attention. I know it was impossible for one of them to refuse to marry the other - have I really turned into someone that despicable? I clenched my tists tighter and looked down at my lap and shoes, trying my hardest not to look at the scene displayed before me - or at least when they were finished with the I-Do's.
"You may now kiss the bride," the priest announced.
The people in their seats rose up, and I decided it wouldn't hurt if I followed. I watched Draco bring Granger closer to him, and I watched their lips lock for a couple of moments. They were sharing the kiss I never thought I would have; never would have. Not anymore.
Everyone clapped and I guess I had to give them some attention, even if it was just a little. I started clapping and before I knew it, tears were rolling down my cheeks faster than I've ever felt them. The old woman turned to me again.
"Weddings are absolutely magical, aren't they?"
I gave her a weak smile before excusing myself. At the point I finally made it through the rows of celebrating people, a party was being held. Draco and Granger were nowhere in sight, but I didn't intend to go looking for them anytime soon. Instead, I walked towards a nearby lake, leaning against a tree.
Picking up a stray pebble, I flung it into the lake. My mind raced with memories of our school years and how I've acted around him. Did he really see through my disguise and find out I was always trying to impress him? Or did he pretend that he didn't notice anything peculiar about me? Stress reached its highest and I looked down on the crackly grass below my shoes, kicking it around to keep myself occupied.
"Enjoying the view?" A familiar and heart-shattering voice called from behind.
Turning my head around instantly, I was face-to-face with him. He was carryinga glass of red wine in one of his hands; his other in his pocket. He gave me a smile, but I turned around glumly and gulped. Why was it that I couldn't look at him directly for even a few seconds?
"...Shouldn't you be at the party?" I asked with no meaning of offense. "Granger's probably looking for you..."
Draco walked over, a few feet away from where I standing. He took a sip from his glass and chuckled a little.
"No, she's fine. I asked her before coming here," he began. "Tell me, was it you who I saw in the back? Crying?"
I fiddled with myfingers and brushed the sides of my dress with my hands nervously. I tried my hardest to avoid any possible eye contact with him for I would find it unbearable to stand still. Turning my head away as far as it could go, I tried to decrease my sniffling before I decided to respond.
He walked up to me and pulled out a handkerchief from his opposite pocket. Taking it without a word, I wiped the tears that managed to stick to my cheeks away to oblivion, cluthing the cloth firmly in my hands afterwards.
"Listen, Pansy," he said calmly. "I know you're dissappointed."
Refusing to reply or say anything at all, I turned my entire body around, my back facing him. I let my bangs cover my eyes for I didn't want him to see me crying again. And since I suddenly planned this tobe our last meeting in history, my body trembled and I bit my lip. It was difficult to fight the tears back, and if he kept speaking to me with that voice I yearned to hear for so long, I might even run away. Never to see his face again.
He placed a hand on one of my shoulders which sent a thousand jolts up my spine. His warm palm felt warm against my cold skin, and although it made me feel uneasy to admit, it was very soothing.I haven't felt anything like this in a very, very long time.
I was as weak as I was, so when he turned me around to face him, I didn't do anything to stop him. Still looking down at my feet, my sobs began to grow louder and more intense. Draco gently pushed my head up from my chin with a hand, so that I can see his eyes and not look away.
Hazel met slate. I've never felt so rejuvenated ever since my Hogwarts years. I dropped the handkerchief to the ground and he lowered his wine glass. Tears clung to my eyelashes and I can feel some of my mascara coming off. But still, without hesitation, Draco continued to look at me.
"Pansy, I know I've upset you greatly," he cooed, his voice enchanting me like a childhood lullaby. "And I've came here to apologize."
Oh no. This was too much for me to handle. I jerked my head away, knocking his hand aside and buried my face with my palms. I cried as tears escaped through the slits in-between my fingers to freedom, descending onto the Earth or rolling down my arms.
"But, you told me Draco. You taught me that Purebloods and...a-and Muggleborns were forbidden. And I listened." I said, sniffles partially interfering with my speech. "And I...I..."
When I was about to bellow him those three words I've always desired to speak, and not in front of a mirror for practice, he pulled mein a friendly hug. Friendly hug and nothing more than that, as always. I could feel his sleeve soaken up from the amount of tears that escaped me.
Once we pulled away, he brushed his fingers through my hair, exactly how I used to do to him on those extraordinary train rides.
"I don't want this to be our last meeting, Pansy. You're too much of a sister to me."
Was I dreaming? Sister? And not just a friend?
I stood motionless where I was as Draco took a final sip of his wine until there was none left. Once he finished his drink, he began to take a few steps away from me. He turned around and waved at me slightly, smiling a little.
And that was the last time I've stared into those piercing - but charming - gray eyes of his.
So what do you think? That took me longer to write than a normal update for The Good and the Bad, actually I really do hope you liked it and thank you very much for taking the time to read it to the end. Please, please review and I hope to hear from you guys soon!