Disclaimer: I don't own anything here. I'm sure you can figure out who owns them. c: Unless you don't recognize it and I don't give credit for it… then I own it. (Because this was original at the time of original posting, I do take credit for the research that went into this and the plot line.)
Okay, so yet another dark ficlet… well, not really a ficlet, anyway… with all the dark ficlets you would begin to think that I really hate Bella. I don't. I love Bella, I relate to her… minus the hot boyfriend… or boyfriend in general. le sigh.
So, I've decided that I'm finally going to explore an Edward POV… so every other chapter will be from Edward's POV. Bella than Edward than Bella than Edward, you get it?
Edward's chapter will be shorter due to me having a hard time writing his emotions and not really understanding where he comes from and such. Also, I'm from southern California, I live three minutes from the beach. I have to try really hard to keep the words 'like' and 'totally' out of my characters vocab.
I don't know how far I am going to take this fic, so we'll just see where I stop. Be sure to check out my other stories. So, after you read the next chapters click the review button and then click on my user name!
Innocence Lost; Chapter One
"Um, Jessica invited me to go down to First Beach with everyone this Friday, it's supposed to be sunny," part of me desperately wanted to go with everyone to the beach, but another part of me didn't want to leave Edward for the night.
Ditching sixth period had become a bit of a habit for both of us, with Charlie's new rules and stricter visiting hours (none) time between Edward and I was dwindling down. Edward still came over when I went to bed, but after spending multiple nights talking till dawn I began to fall asleep in class. And although I was willing to take that consequence Edward didn't want to watch me fail classes.
Besides, it was just PE. Who knew how convenient having a boyfriend whose father was a doctor would be, Edward had connived him into writing me a note and all of the sudden I was out of PE. Edward had said something about having to work extra hours at the hospital, but he didn't seem to worried about the penalty of spending more time with me.
I was sure Charlie would let me out of the house to socialize with people besides Edward.
He still thought Edward was dangerous for me, okay, he was right. But Edward was a danger I was willing to play with.
"Are you asking permission?" he seemed surprised.
"I guess," I leaned against him in the parked car. We had ditched sixth period (PE) and had been enjoying the peace and comfort found in the car and in a CD of Edward's favorite sonatas.
"Oh, silly Bella, you don't need to ask permission," he was obviously amused by me 'sillyness.'
I could tell that I was blushing and he chuckled more out of enjoyment, "Well, I just thought that it would be a polite thing to do. I mean, you ask me if you can go hunting? And that's something that's quite necessary."
"Bella, you don't need to ask me permission if you want to socialize," he turned the music down and placed his hand back on mine, "I'm assuming that trio of raging hormones will be there?" meaning Eric, Tyler and Mike.
"Oh, yes," I said dryly, although Edward knew he was the only person in my picture currently, he still wasn't fond of having that certain trio around me, "You've seen through my scheme, I'm simply going to meet up with those guys cause you just aren't man enough for me."
Edward sighed, not finding my humor the least bit funny, "It's not what you'll do Bella, it's what they'll do. You can't see what they are thinking in their minds and believe me I'm glad that you can't, you shouldn't have to hear what they are thinking. But, what I hear, it worries me."
I was sure Edward had every right to be worried, but it was still annoying, "I'll be fine, Edward. Jessica and Angela and everyone will be there, you don't need to be worried," I was tempted to tell him to go have a guys night out with Emmett and Jasper or something, but I knew sending him out would be futile. Edward would continue to worry about me and I was sure Jasper wouldn't appreciate spending quality time with him when worry was echoing off of him faster than aftershocks after an earthquake.
"Take a phone?" Edward said, kissing the side of my head in our embrace. I nodded my head and Edward leaned over to the glove box and pulled a silver cell phone out, flipping it open and turning it on, "Call me for anything?"
"Edward, I'll be fine," the bell rang from outside and students began to gather in the parking lot, making plans for the up coming weekend. Edward fluidly pulled the car out of the tight parking space and began to speed down the street.
"What time are you going down there?"
"Around eight," here came the waterfall of questions.
"After dark?" he sounded worried.
I sighed, "Yes, generally when the sun goes down it gets dark. And there's not much fun in having a bonfire during the day time."
"Bella," he warned, obviously not appreciating my sarcastic tone, "You know that Victoria is still out there."
"I highly doubt she would try to off me in front of ump-teen other people and on werewolf territory," Edward slowly pulled into the driveway of my house and turned off the car.
He turned towards me, the worry in his eyes almost made me want to call up Jessica and tell her I couldn't go, "Bella, twenty or so people is nothing to a determined vampire. I told you about how I felt that first day in biology, all those kids were nothing when it came to reaching the goal of drinking your blood," it was comforting that he could talk so lightly about drinking me, like he was simply talking about going down to the local burger joint and picking up a burger and fries.
"Edward!" no matter how much I cared about Edward's feelings I really did want to go to this party, "I'll be fine. Besides, if anything is going to happen- which it won't- Alice will have a vision and you'll use your Superman vampire speed and save me and then we'll go sit in my room and you can mope about what a bad influence you are on me and that if you weren't here I would be so much safer," I took a deep breath and continued by saga, "Then I'll counter back that my life was nothing before you and you promised never to leave me and that when you did before you were completely miserable when you weren't with and then I would ask you if you wanted to endure that again?"
I was only slightly dizzy after the ordeal.
"Okay, can I at least give you a curfew?" I stared at him and raised my eyebrows, "Well, do you expect me to pace around your room wondering when you'll be there?"
"Edward," I took his hands in mine and looked at him, forcing a serious look to my face, "It's not my problem that you can't find ways to be productive," I broke into giggles and got out of the car. I went over to his window and leaned in, "I love you, Edward. But you gotta cut the umbilical cord- at least until I get home," I kissed his cheek briefly.
"Bella!" he called out, but I was already in the house. He could have followed me in and held me through out the night so I would miss the party and stay safe, but maybe he realized he was acting like a nut.
I arrived at the party well after dark, the fire was roaring and the music was loud. It seemed that everyone from school was there along with a good amount of people from La Push, "Bella!" someone rushed over and swung there arm around my neck.
"Hey Mike," I walked out of his embrace, hoping he would take the hint.
"I'm glad you came," he continued to walk with me, "Um, did Cullen come?"
"No, Edward wasn't able to make it. He needed to help down at the hospital."
"That's too bad," he didn't sound sincere at all, "Do you want a drink? We could go dance if you want?"
"You know, I would love a Mr. Pibb," I hated the soda but I just wanted to get him away from me.
"Okay, just stay here," not a chance.
"Okay! Thanks," I called after him as he high-tailed it over to the table of coolers, I just had to hope that Jessica and Angela had only bought name brand sodas.
I walked around the party, saying hi to the people I knew. I made my way over to the rocky shore, remembering everything that had taken place on this beach and in these waters.
"It's beautiful, isn't it? The strong power of the current crashing onto the rocks over and over again, creating an uneven rhythm," a voice said from behind me.
"Um, well, mostly I just think of big, wet and salty," I turned around, "Hi Jacob."
"Hey, Bells," he walked over and stood next to me, staring out into the dark ocean, "It all seems so long ago, doesn't it?"
I knew what he was speaking of, "Yeah and then it feels like it was just yesterday and nothing has changed at all."
"And yet everything has."
"It had to, Jake. Things couldn't stay the same, not with Edward back," he started to say something but continued, "I know you don't understand it and maybe you never will, but I love Edward and I love you too, but the love for Edward is completely different from what I have for you," I turned towards him and looked him in the face.
"I love you, Jake, you saved my life. And not just when you pulled me from those waters, but by befriending me when I needed a friend the most. You helped me out so much, in a way no one else did or could. And I'm very grateful for that.
"But, I don't love you like I do Edward. I don't even know how to describe what I feel for Edward or why I love him- I just do, even though he has hurt me. But, maybe that's what love is-"
"Bella," Jacob interrupted, "Thank you for trying to explain, but could you please not go into detail about yours and Edward's love. I'd really rather not have the knife in my heart twisted."
"Jake, I'm sorry. But, I can't help it."
"I know, Bells, it's just something I'm going to have to deal with. Maybe I'll find my savior, my Jacob… only female. You know what I mean."
"Of course I do. We can still be friends though, right?"
There was a pause before he answered, "We can try. But I can't promise anything, Bells."
"I'm gonna take a walk, if anyone is looking for me just tell them I went that way," I pointed down towards the lighthouse, hoping no one would ask and I could find refuge there.
"Of course," he gave me a halfhearted hug and went back to the party.
I walked silently down the shore; the crashing waves soon over powered the loud music and teens.
"Bella, you left," it was Mike again.
"Um, yeah, it just got kind of loud and I haven't been down here since Edward came back. He's not into the beach all that much," of course that wasn't the real reason but I didn't think I would or should explain to Mike how my boyfriend hated, no despised Jacob and his entire family.
"That's too bad, Bella," he walked closely next to me, our arms brushing each other, I moved away. I continued to walk in silence, hoping he would take the hint and leave. But it was hard to get lost in my thoughts again with Mike so nearby.
"You shouldn't be with Edward," Mike's words were like a slap in the face.
"Mike, I really don't think you have any place in Edward and my relationship," I walked faster, hoping I could lose him.
"I was the first person who was nice to you in Forks, I went out of my way to help you. Cullen ignored you!"
I frowned at him, we had reached the rocky cliff and I turned around, "You don't know the circumstances, Mike!" I tried to push him out of my way to walk back to the party but he stopped me, pushing me against the rock, "Mike, let me go by."
"No, you're supposed me be with me," his lips crushed mine, I struggled against him and the rock, I felt my shirt rip open against the sharp stone.
"Mike, stop it! You don't want to do this," I moved my head away from him, trying to scream for help but his hand covered mine, "No!" but cries were useless.