I'm back! This is a fanfic I thought of while watching some videos on YouTube and I came across a parody on a video called "Boot to the head", using the characters of Phoenix Wright, and I just thought it would be funny if it would be brought to the Narutoverse.
So, without any more delays, here's "Boot to the head", Naruto style. Enjoy! ^_^
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, Phoenix Wright or the video "Boot to the head." I do, however, own this fic.
It was a peaceful day in Otogakure, except for one fact: Orochimaru had died. And now, the only person he had entrusted his will, Kabuto, was about to read it to Orochimaru's (some somewhat) loyal followers.
"As the executor of Orochimaru-sama's estate, I have been empowered to read his last will and testament." Kabuto said.
"Well, get on with it, I have more giant swords to go collect." Suigetsu said, growing impatient.
"Oohh, poor Orochimaru-sama! Wwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!" said Karin, "crying" her eyes out.
"There, there, Karin!" said Sasuke, trying (not really that hard) to comfort her.
"My, how predictably boring!" said Juugo. "KILL PEOPLE!"
"Orochimaru-sama was such a kind man…" said Kimimaro, with a saddened face.
"If we are all seated, I shall now proceed with the reading." Said Kabuto, adjusting his glasses and looking down at the piece of paper on his hands.
"I knew it…" said Juugo, with a bored look on his face. Suigetsu just gave a small laugh.
"I, Orochimaru, being sound of mind and body…" read Kabuto.
"That's a laugh!" said Suigetsu, laughing even harder this time.
Kabuto just glared at him and continued. "… do here by divide my considerable estates as follows: to my overly emotional student Karin…"
"Wwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!" "cried" once again Karin.
"I think he's talking about you." Said Sasuke.
"Oh!" With that she immediately stopped and paid attention to Kabuto, who sweat-dropped. "What a change in moods." He thought, but pushed that thought aside and continued.
"… who grubbed with her boyfriend Sasuke-kun…" said Kabuto, trying to restrain his laughter.
"SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!" yelled Sasuke.
"… grubbed for everything they could get from me and then cried crocodile tears when it was the last thing I needed…"
"What?" she said, shocked.
"…To her I leave… a boot to the head!"
"A what?" she asked, outraged. Suddenly, out of nowhere, came flying a boot that hit Karin right on her face. "Owww!"
"Are you OK?" asked Sasuke, not really wanting to know.
"…And another boot to her wimpy boyfriend, Sasuke." Said Kabuto. Another boot appeared and this time hit Sasuke on his face. "Owww!"
"I'M NOT HER BOYFRIEND!"
On the other side of the room, Suigetsu laughed even harder at this scene.
"Where are all these boots coming from?"
"Dunno. Seems every time it is stated on the will and I say it, said person gets hit." Said Kabuto, impressed with the jutsu placed on the will.
"This is an outrage!" said Karin, with a boot print on her face.
Kabuto then continued to read the will. "But still, you are my student, both of you admired all the power that I had to give you and since I no longer need it…"
"Ohh, Orochimaru-sama, you are too kind!" said Karin, faking a smile.
"… I leave…" Kabuto started to laugh on the inside. "another boot to the head."
"What?" she asked, and another boot hit Karin right on her face. "Owww!"
"And one more to Sasuke." WHAM!
By now, Suigetsu could barely control himself from all the laughter.
"Next, is my other student Suigetsu…"
"Hey, I don't want no boot to the head!" said Suigetsu, holding his sword.
"To Suigetsu, who had the biggest obsession over swords I have ever seen…"
"I'm covering up my head!" he exclaimed, holding his sword over his head for protection.
"…I leave my snake sword, the Kusanagi Sword."
"Really?" he said, sounding surprised and uncovering his head.
"And a boot to the head." WHAM.
"And another for Karin and the wimp." WHAM! WHAM!
"You're enjoying this, aren't you?" asked Sasuke, with several boot prints on his face.
"My, whatever makes you say that?" Kabuto said, with an evil glint on his eyes. " Anyway, next, to my other student, Juugo…"
"This is so predictable…"
"…I leave a boot to the head…"
WHAM! "I knew it…" Juugo said, holding his head.
"And one for Karin and the wimp." WHAM! WHAM! By now, these two could barely get up.
"And that takes care of obligations with my students. And now, to my protégé, Kimimaro…"
"Oh, I don't want anything!" said Kimimaro, afraid that he too, would get a boot to the head.
"…who always stood by me these many, many years, and followed my every order without question…"
"I really didn't mind…" he said, starting to feel more relieved.
"To Kimimaro, I leave… a boot to the head!" WHAM!
"And one for Karin and the wimp." WHAM! WHAM!
"And so, to my pet snake Manda, I leave my entire vast… boot to the head." WHAM
"Damn you, Orochimaru…" said Manda, as he disappeared in a puff of smoke.
"And finally, to the reader of my will, and my medical assistant Kabuto, who as helped me on this will, I leave not a boot to the head, but an angry anaconda that is to attack him." Kabuto's eyes widened at this and he felt a sharp pain coming from his leg. "Owwww! And I leave my entire estate of 10 million ryo to the various labs I own in Otogakure, so that the experiments can be carried on." He then relaxed after saying this, as the angry anaconda also disappeared in a puff of smoke. He then concentrated, and green chakra appeared in his hands, as he tended to his wound.
"Is that it?" asked Sasuke.
"That's it?" said Juugo.
"That's disgraceful!" said Suigetsu.
"Why are you complaining?! You got a sword!" said Kimimaro.
"Jealous much?" said Suigetsu, grinning.
"There's one last thing for everyone." Said Kabuto, after recovering from the attack and readjusting his glasses.
"Cover your heads, everybody!" said Suigetsu, again covering his head with his sword.
"I also leave everyone a lifetime supply of ice cream."
"Ice cream?!" They all asked, surprised.
"Well, what flavour is it?"
Kabuto then grinned, before replying. "Boot to the head."
WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM!
Another one-shot done.
I hope you liked it and I strongly recommend you to take a look at the video that inspired this fic.
As for the fact that Orochimaru kept calling Sasuke "wimp", well it happened for 3 reasons.
He was offended that Sasuke was with Karin;
Sasuke: I'M NOT WITH KARIN!
Me: That's not what she said!
It's in the original video;
I hate Sasuke.
Anywayz, read and review! ^_^