A Lily and Snape fic…maybe Deathly Hallows spoilers, I'm not sure. Wouldn't read it if you haven't read the book, anyways.
Lily and Sev are one of my absolute favourite pairs in HP (my other favourite being Lupin and Tonks) and I've been drawing them a lot, so I thought I could write them too.
Set in 1981…so they're both 21! Enjoy…
Snape sat in the study, drumming the fingers of one hand absent-mindedly on Dumbledore's desk, his heart thumping in his chest. He had been at it for the last hour – getting up, fidgeting, sitting down…
Since Pettigrew had betrayed the Potters to Voldemort, it was clear that no one could be trusted to be Secret Keeper for them, except perhaps him. Sirius, he knew James would prefer, but most of the wizarding world believed him to be the betrayer, despite the fact that he was the one who had alerted them to Peter's betrayal in time for them to escape. Because of this, Sirius was now on the list of Death eaters, and they couldn't afford for the Potter's Secret Keeper to be killed or tortured, something that Sirius had agreed, although resentfully. Therefore Lily was meeting himself and Dumbledore today to discuss their last possible option. Severus's heart thumped harder at the thought of seeing her after all this time. He flicked a black strand out of his face, he subconsciously smoothed his robes, and he was surprised to find that his hands were shaking.
Dumbledore arrived first, in sweeping robes of midnight blue, his hair and beard gleaming in the late afternoon sun pouring in through the high windows. He did not seem surprised to find Snape in a state of nervous anticipation, and merely smiled benignly, taking the chair beside him, and glancing briefly at the large gold watch he had extracted from his pocket. The seconds dragged by, Snape jumping at the smallest noises, until finally, Lily arrived.
As she swept through the door, Snape's heart leapt. If possible, she was even more beautiful than he had remembered her. She was wearing tight black jeans and an old green jumper, both half-obscured by a long black cloak fastened at her throat. His eyes moved to her face, the face that had haunted his dreams for so long…
Her eyes were the same almond shaped, bright green that he loved, and dark auburn hair cascaded down her back. Snape found that he was unable to take his eyes off her, and that he was visited by a powerful urge to reach out and touch her, to hold her and never ever let go. But she was out of bounds, so he gripped the sides of his chair, as if trying to crush the wood in the palm of his hand. For the moment she was greeting Dumbledore, and had not noticed the sallow, skinny, dark haired man who had once been her best friend. Finally, after what seemed like an age, those beautiful green eyes turned to him.
Severus felt as though his heart was going to leap out of his chest, she was looking at him, looking at him after four years apart, but suddenly it felt to him as though the world had fallen into place. This was where he was meant to be.
"Severus." She said, nodding curtly at him, her voice cold, which shot through his chest like physical pain. He certainly felt like she'd just shoved a knife through his heart. She looked back at Dumbledore, the cold expression on her face turning to anger. "What's he doing here? Wasn't he the one who made hiding necessary? He sold us to Voldemort!"
"Severus no longer works for Lord Voldemort," Dumbledore explained gently "He has turned spy at great personal risk, and it is for that reason I believe that he is the only person that we can rely on to be your Secret Keeper."
Lily looked aghast. She backed away from both of them.
"No! He hates James, he hates all of us, wants us dead! We can't trust him, Dumbledore, he's a Death Eater!"
"I don't hate you." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop himself. "I have never hated you."
Lily, who was by now, nearly backed against the door, walked up to Dumbledore's desk, and looked at him, her face a little surprised, but not as much as she might have expected. It was like they were travelling back in time, two teenagers arguing over friends and curses and James Potter. Snape had got up and moved round the desk so he was standing in front of her. Everything in the room seemed to melt away – the spindly little tables, the whirring silver instruments, Fawkes' bright plumage, and Dumbledore, his magnificent silver beard fading into the shadows.
"I'm a Mudblood, Sev." Lily said angrily, her chin sticking out, reminding him forcibly of her stubbornness when they were at Hogwarts "The people Voldemort hates. You worked for Voldemort, how can you not hate me?"
Severus took a deep breath, trying to work out how to best word his response. Lily's eyes were fixed on his face, making it incredibly difficult to concentrate.
"I have not used that word since I called you that. You have no idea how much I regretted it. Don't you tell me I want you dead, Lily Evans."
Lily was looking more and more touched, but she still had that unmovable sense of right and wrong, and she wasn't quite ready to forgive him.
"You've still killed and tortured Muggleborns haven't you?" she asked "On Voldemort's orders."
He didn't respond, and both of them realised how very far they had both strayed from the children who had once sat by the swings, talking about Hogwarts and Dementors, Lily comforting Severus about his family, him assuring her that being Muggleborn made no difference at all. Gone were the days that Lily could insult James Potter and the world felt right again, because they were married, and he could no longer lie to her about cursing people, because he had been a Death Eater, he had killed, tortured, torn people apart. It was harder for them to forgive each other.
"I'm sorry, Sev." Lily said, after a moment of silence, her eyes slightly brighter than normal "If you hadn't gotten into Dark Magic, I…well things would have been different."
They stood looking at each other for a few more moments, baffled by what had passed between them. Lily could see some kind of powerful emotion in his eyes, and looking into her green one's Severus could have sworn he saw a flicker of something he had seen only a few times before, something that he hadn't seen since before that dreadful day in the fifth year. Mind you, after that she had only looked at him to glare.
Dumbledore suddenly burst from nowhere, a smile on his face, making the pair of them jump and spring backwards from each other.
"So, that's settled then!" he said cheerfully.
By this time Lily is Lily Potter, but Snape calls her Evans as that's who she is to him. Just so you know…that wasn't a slip of the mind.
Drop us a review and let me know what you think…please? x