Disclaimer: I own nothing that is not mine, and everything that IS mine. Capiche?

WARNING! This story contains content not suitable for those with sanity. Please visit your local Elder God for treatment before reading.

The soldiers sang and danced, cheering loudly in celebration of the end of the battle, and Nanoha Takamachi couldn't help but feel herself being drawn into the festivities despite the cold, numbing sensation in her gut that came with the realization that she had utterly, utterly screwed the pooch this time.

'Well, Nanoha...' the voice of Hayate Yagami echoed in her mind, and Nanoha glanced over at where her longtime friend and commander was allowing herself to be swirled about by a dancing stormtrooper, the false and slightly manic smile plastered on her face somewhat but not completely covering up her expression of pure horror, though thankfully the men around them were mostly too busy - or drunk - to notice. 'I told you your "Divine Buster first, ask questions later" policy was going to get us into trouble one day. Again.'

'Um...' Nanoha tried to raise an argument in her defense, then reluctantly admitted to herself that there wasn't all that much she could say to that effect right now.

"Die Straße frei, den braunen Bataillonen!" roared a small group of soldiers nearby, waving their helmets in the air, "Die Straße frei, dem Sturmabteilungsmann!"

'...I... um. I messed up here, didn't I?'

'Nanoha, you changed the course of history.' Hayate glanced over at the still-steaming crater that had once been a major city. 'An entire planet's history. Our entire planet's history. We're lucky this is an alternate Earth, or...' She visibly shuddered, though the - now two - soldiers on either side of her were too busy themselves swaying back and forth while singing along to notice. 'Face it. You fucked up this time.'

"Kam'raden, die Rotfront und Reaktion erschossen... Marschier'n im Geist, in uns'ren Reihen mit!"

'I can fix this! Really! Just let me get Raising Heart and go find-'

'No. No, Nanoha, you're not going to go blow up anything else. Or anyone else. No more Starlight Breakers for you, not for a long time.'

'Mou...'

"Kam'raden, die Rotfront und Reaktion erschossen! Marschier'n im Geist, in uns'ren Reihen mit!" the men leading the chorus concluded, suddenly snapping briskly to attention and throwing their right arms up in salute, an action Nanoha and Hayate were horrified to find themselves copying along with the assembly around them. "SIEG! HEIL!"

Fate Harlaown, fully caught up in the celebratory mood, wondered what exactly had her friends so spooked. Granted, changing history was against TSAB regulations, and she was sure she wouldn't have liked the idea of messing around with Midchilda's history - even an alternate Midchilda's history - but the soldiers around them seemed like nice enough people- Fate felt herself being swept off her feet, and she had just a moment's glance of wild eyes, thin dark hair and an odd little mustache before she felt her mouth suddenly hosting a second tongue. Fate stiffened in shock for a moment, then relaxed, reasoning to herself that a drunken kiss from a total stranger was only slightly worse than a drunken kiss from a friend and, thankfully, the stranger was a much better kisser than Subaru. Or Hayate. Or Signum. Not quite as good as Nanoha, though...

Nanoha glanced at the crater that had once been Moscow, the German soldiers - a small knot of whom seemed to be clustered off near one of the panzers clapping and whistling in approval at something, though she couldn't quite tell what through the press of bodies - gathered around them celebrating their undoubtedly now imminent victory on the Eastern Front and the Second World War, and finally at Hayate once again with a sheepish expression.

'Um. Oops?'

Author's Note: I hereby claim credit for writing the first Fate Testarossa/Adolf Hitler pairing in existence (and if others exist, I don't want to know about them). Let's hope this one doesn't catch on.