"Jacob." I stared into his dark eyes, trying to make him take me seriously.
"I love him, Jacob. He's my whole life."
"You love me, too," he reminded me. He held up his hand when I started to protest. "Not the same way, I know. But he's not your whole life, either. Not anymore. Maybe he was once, but he left. And now he's just going to have to deal with the consequence of that choice — me."
I shook my head. "You're impossible."
Suddenly, he was serious. He took my chin in his hand, holding it firmly so that I couldn't look away from his intent gaze.
"Until your heart stops beating, Bella," he said. "I'll be here — fighting. Don't forget that you have options."
"I don't want options," I disagreed, trying to yank my chin free unsuccessfully. "And my heartbeats are numbered, Jacob. The time is almost gone."
His eyes narrowed. "All the more reason to fight — fight harder now, while I can," he whispered. He still had my chin — his fingers holding too tight, till it hurt — and I saw the resolve form abruptly in his eyes.
"N —" I started to object, but it was too late. His lips crushed mine, stopping my protest. He kissed me angrily, roughly, his other hand gripping tight around the back of my neck, making escape impossible. I shoved against his chest with all my strength, but he didn't even seem to notice. His mouth was soft, despite the anger, his lips molding to mine in a warm, unfamiliar way. I grabbed at his face, trying to push it away, failing again. He seemed to notice this time, though, and it aggravated him. His lips forced mine open, and I could feel his hot breath in my mouth. It started to fill me in. My mind made me slip away. His breath smelled so, so, delicious. It was so inviting. I was Eve, told not to eat the apple but did anyway. I mean, the apple was so tasty-looking, and soft, and so perfect, and one bite couldn't hurt. I had been so wrapped up in my thoughts that I didn't even notice the new sensation in my mouth. It tasted different, but I wanted that more too. So I gave him my tongue back. We did that for, who knows how long. Then he started onto my neck. I couldn't even describe that feeling. Then he started going lower, and lower, and lower, "Jacob!"
I awoke with the sun shining on my eyes. I was wrapped up in a blanket in the trunk of Jake's rabbit. He was sleeping right next to me, with no shirt.
Oh shit, I thought. How could I do this to Edward? I didn't even remember how I fell asleep. I needed to remember. Had our kissing escalated to something else? I had three types of guilt on me now, four now: sleeping with Jake (?), even thinking about sleeping with Jake, kissing Jake, and betraying Edward. Then Jacob started to wake. He stretched out his arms, put one around me, and smiled up at the ceiling.
"Hey Jake." I said relaxing
"Morning babe." Jake replied turning to me. Babe-he called me babe?
"What-what" I started
"What-what-what Bells?" he asked
"What-huh," I sighed "What happened last night?" I said, my voice shaking
"You fainted." He replied
"No, before that." I asked
"We made out after you fought with me about that leech you're engaged to." He replied angrily as he talked about Edward. Edward. I love him. I loved him. Did I love Jacob? Did we make love? He didn't fully answer, I don't think.
"Did um, anything else-happen?" I choked out
"Ha! I wish." Jake said looking me in the eyes
"I um, I have to go." I replied getting up and opening the car door.
"Oh come-on! Bella, you can't just make out with me and then go back to Edward! You love me! You proved that last night!"
"First of all, I don't love you. Second, last night never happened, you got that? And third, last night was an accident," I said turning around angrily. "just like you."
"Oh god." Jake said getting up. "Bells, at least let me drive you home! I promise I won't tell anybody and I won't ever try it again!" He said as I started to walk away. I turned around and started back to the rabbit.
"Unless you want it." He said smiling. That was it. I got right up to him and faked a smile. He thought I really wanted to kiss him. Ha! I retracted my arm and pow! There was a cracking sound, but it was my hand, not Jacob's jaw.
"Ow! Ow! Damnit! You broke my hand!" I said as I took my hand back.
"Um, you broke your hand Bella." He said humorously
"Oh you think this is funny? I'll tell you something funny Jake! How about Edward coming over here and ripping you ugly damn face off!" I yelled searching for my phone.
"Well, now I do have to take you home." He replied pointing to my hand.
"No Jake." I said turning away so he couldn't see the tears coming to my eyes. "I hate you…"
"Bella!" He yelled after me
I don't know what I was crying about; betraying Edward, betraying Edward as my fiancé, my hand being broken, or how I said I hated Jacob.
When I got home, it was seven in the morning. Charlie was sitting there, waiting for me right by the door.
"Where the hell have you been?" He asked getting up suddenly
"I was with Jacob." I replied
"What happened that took you about 12 hours?"
"I don't want to talk about it" I said slamming my door and sobbing on my bed.