Chapter 8

The Coming Birthday

"What would you like for your birthday?" Sasuke asked as I ate my cupcake. I love the texture of it… poor thing, being torn apart by a hungry girl who can't even taste it's supposedly delicious ingredients. Perhaps the cook will go easy on me for not telling her anything of its flavor.

"For my death not to be painful." I informed him honestly and looked around the silver kitchen. Metal table at the center of the room, it's long almost the length of my bed but just wide enough for two plates to sit on it horizontally.

"Why does your voice always sound so emotionless but your eyes so sad?" he asked making me blink for a moment then stand up to stare at him with the position I am instead of the pretend friend to friend talk we were having. He needs to understand his position compared to mine. I rested a hand on the cold metal and ignored the cook and her workers who were staring at us.

"Show respect as my guard and do not force me to punish you." I commanded and then turned around to leave. Before I did I looked back at the workers. None of them look familiar. Gaara must be killing much more than I had thought at first.

I walked swiftly to my room ignoring the guards, armor, and gothic paintings that covered the hall. They all wish to prepare for my birthday but I refuse to give any opinion on anything. When I got to my room Gaara was there with open arms. I skipped over to him and began to think about the dancing puppets in the kitchen, poor little things just got their strings.

"If it isn't the birthday girl." Gaara smiled at me and hugged me tightly around the waist. I looked at him for a moment then tried to show some kind of emotion. Instead I looked at the silent Eloise. She's so sad isn't she? What is she going to do now?

"I still have a month." I informed him darkly. I don't want to think about that just yet. Everyone is preparing much too early. I don't want to die yet! I grabbed hold of one of my dolls and smirked at it. "You honestly think you are a match for my Eloise? Darling Betty it's time to die." I whispered and threw her against the ground.

I stared at her shattered pieces then looked up at Gaara. "Please don't cry, Sakura." He said softly leaning toward me. I took a step back and glared at him then bent down and picked up a piece of her skin. The poor girl never knew how much Eloise loves her spot in this world. If only she had known.

I laughed at the dolls crying face then turned to Gaara. "Let's have fun." I said slowly and then began to dance around the room. He took hold of my hands and danced with me, his eyes were soft and a small smile was on his lips. My lips were tight as I glanced over at the doll; it's no longer a release from my pain thanks to Gaara. It's only something I do to pretend things are normal.

"Who were you talking with today?" He asked me softly. I looked up at him and said nothing only making his eyes narrow. He would never hurt me but Gaara is a bit… temperamental. If I don't answer him he may go off and kill someone to feed his mother's lust and help sooth his rage.

"Sasuke was asking what I would like for my birthday." I said just as he twirled me. I pressed my hands against his chest and looked up into his light blue orbs. "I got mad at him. He talks too much for his own good." I informed Gaara hoping he would let Sasuke and Naruto off.

The tension in the small room rose as I felt the rage building within my fiancé. The red paint made it seem… bloody and tainted in here. I don't know why but I think this is a room for the insane. I looked at the peeling paint and watched the dolls that look so peaceful and calm. There's not much in this room anymore. It's becoming so small… like my precious guards.

He's wanted to kill them both for so long but that would raise suspicions while no one else would. They've been here to serve me for too many years. I stared at him for a moment then smiled at him. I need to give him as much encouragement as possible in order to keep him in line.

"I don't like them." He growled but I ignored him completely and went over to my dolls. He can hate who he wants and kill whoever won't get him thrown in jail. I don't care about his killing sprees any longer. I'm still nervous about how he wants to kill those two though.

"I need a pet." I said softly as I ran a finger down one of my doll's cheek. The poor little girl needs to be killed. I picked her up and dropped her just right so that the poor doll shattered. Who cares about such a meek little thing anyway? It's not as though she's any use to anyone.

"Whenever you get a pet you say you will take care of it on your own and it dies. Every time." Gaara growled making me look at him sadly. How could he say such a thing to me? I looked down at my doll and stepped on its head. The doll wasn't broken enough.

"Poor kitten thinks he knows best." I said to Eloise and then grabbed another doll and threw it at him. He let the doll hit him causing a small gash on his forehead. I watched the blood trickle down in complete happiness. He placed his fingers against the cut on his forehead then put his bloody fingers in his mouth.

"I'm sorry Sakura… I'm just a bit tired that's all. I want to keep you but your admirers are doing their best to steal you away." He informed me tiredly. I looked at him softly then ran a hand through his innocent white hair.

"I am yours and I always will be, until the day I die." I whispered and kissed the blood on his forehead before licking it off my lips. He smiled at me but it was sad, as though he had finally decided on how I would die and why.

"Eloise is lonely." I murmured then walked over to her and held the doll against me tightly. I will be fifteen in October and it's September. What am I going to do? Nothing. I can't do anything at all. Gaara will soon find a reason to kill me, and then I will be happy.

"Do you need me to help you comfort her?" He asked softly from behind me. I turned around and almost melted in his gaze. I shook my head though and held onto her tighter then glanced over at the food on my bedside table. It looks like people really want me to eat right now.

"Thank you Gaara for all that you have done." I whispered and looked at him softly before nodding my head. He took a step forward then ran a hand through my hair and kissed the top of my head. I don't want him to feel pain or loneliness right now. I love him too much for that. His insanity is a curse he does not deserve. I want him to be the gentleman he is so close to being.

His habit of murder isn't helping…

"I love you." He whispered and wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer. I almost leaned back into him but then… my vision turned red and I was stuck pressing against him for support instead of comfort. Gaara looked at me in shock and I couldn't blame him. Tears were running down Eloise's cheeks while I tried not to squirm away.

"Too much blood!" I shouted and hugged him tightly, dropping Eloise to the ground. Her face broke apart but I was too busy screaming to do anything. Sasuke and Naruto rushed into the room and regarded me with calm faces, but I could see the horror and shock in their eyes.

"What happened?" Sasuke asked softly. My fiancé continued to stroke my hair as he looked at the ground. Blood… is slipping down the walls and crawling down the faces of everyone around me. My pulse quickened when I noticed the blood that soaked my own hands. It's so wet… and watery…

"Please don't kill me…" I pleaded, barely hearing my own voice. The guards regarded Gaara with guarded instincts that showed their distrust and instincts that he caused this of pain within me. Although it's true, I will never let them do him any harm.

"Leave us be." Gaara growled out and held me against him. My arms were around his neck while my legs pressed against his waist. I need someone close to me right now… someone who loves me so much… but if he will someday kill me- does Gaara count?

Naruto and Sasuke were still in the room so I gave them one look, it was full of pain and hatred. This look has always let them know when I need to be alone. They're used to it and now accept it as their excuse to leave the room. "Goodbye princess." They both said with a bow, acting like the obedient servants they practically are.

"I'm sorry…" I said slowly as my vision went back to normal. He held me tighter against him then smiled at me softly. Stroking my hair he then set me down on the bed and kissed my forehead. He won't have sex with me. Not with the demon within him and not when we're not married. I respect him for that and trust him with my being.

He snorted. "You don't think I can handle a panic attack…" He said shaking his head. I don't know what the punishment would be since Gaara didn't say so I just lied on my bed and thought about my upcoming birthday. "How are you feeling?" He asked softly. I looked at my fiancé for a moment then glanced over at my food.

"I'm eating one meal a day. You know this so why are you asking?" I questioned curiously. He blinked for a moment in what appeared to be anger then hugged me tightly.

"I'll be going away for a while." He informed me softly. My whole body froze against his then I pulled away and laughed. Gaara is always joking with me. I wish for once that he would take me seriously! Oh well, this is one of the things I love about him. He is so kind but can also crack a joke every once in a while.

"No you aren't, my silly prince. We both know you will stay here for my birthday then marry me afterward." I smiled and tried to pull back so I could kiss him. Gaara wouldn't let me, he's holding me too tightly. My eyes widened realizing that this might not be a joke.

"No Sakura. I'm going to have to leave. My curse makes me crave the kill and it's begging for your blood, I would never kill you for something so stupid but… but my jealousy is making me want to have you and only you. With each person I kill their blood remains on my hands, and I can feel their presence with me always. If I killed you then you would always be with me."

I now know why he would kill me.

His tears began to stain my dress, as his grip on me tightened. "I want to be the only one to have you, Sakura. You are my only one and my only love. If I kill you… I have to go speak with my parents about our marriage. You may need guards that will stop me from killing you if I get too… well if I go blood crazy." He whispered.

I held his hand and pushed myself back when he loosened his grip. He wants to kill me so that he may have me forever on his hands and with him. That is something that I can handle. I looked up at him and wiped the tears from his eyes before kissing him deeply. We kissed and told each other how much we need the other to survive in this dark cold world.

"You can kill me." I whispered.