A/N: First Twilight fanfic! I apologize for my very, very crappy attempt at humor.
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I just like to borrow the characters.
Finally we were living our happily ever after. Renesmee matured at the beautiful age of seven years (in her teenage years, she was so confused with the rapid changes she'd been going through that all of the Cullen women had to have an hour long sit down giving her "the talk". I thought it was quite funny.)
Her and Jacob are now married (well they've been married for about a century) and Jacob had made sure to phase at least once a day to ensure that he didn't age.
I've finally started to like him, even if it took about fifty years to forgive the fact that he'd basically claimed my daughter at the precious age of five minutes after falling in love with Bella and plotting to steal her from me. I call that progress. Just five years ago I shook the habit of calling him mutt. Even Rosalie calls him by his name now.
Bella and I are living very happily together as well as the rest of the family. We currently reside in Eugene, Oregon which is pretty much like Forks, Washington. Tomorrow we start Eugene Public High School. I'm not very excited as all of the high schools are the same, boring purgatory every four years. I, for one, am sick of it.
We were all in the living room of our new apartment watching some college basketball game or another (minus Carlisle and Esme as they were out hunting). Suddenly Emmett let out a loud sigh and threw the remote on the couch.
"Ugh! I'm so bored of this. Can we please do something fun for once?"
"Emmett what the hell are you talking about?" Asked an annoyed Rosalie. Of course, I knew where exactly he was going with his exclamation so I just sat back and let him tell his idea his way.
"I'm talking about high school." He said, looking around with a steely glint in his eye, "We've always been the boring family that no one knows. Let's make this year different." His eyes lit up with mischief that had sent babies crying and little children running away in fear, "When we go to school tomorrow, how about we start out with a bang. You know, let's see how long it takes for them to throw us out." When Emmett finished his speech and looked around at the rest of the family, he smiled at all of the looks of comprehension on their faces.
"So what does this mean? We can get in trouble with teachers and stuff and be noticed?" asked an overly exited Alice. I for one couldn't wait. For every school we've been to, there has been at least one overly persistent guy after Bella or my daughter or my one of my sisters (and a few times, my own mother) and the only thing I was able to do was control my actions and gently tell him to back off. This would all change.
"Hmm this sounds like fun. I can make up a sort of alternate personality. Like acting. Now I'm starting to get exited!" said Bella. At that moment, Emmett piped up again.
"Yeah right! Like you could act!" He dissolved into giggles and Rosalie, who was sitting next to him, rolled her eyes through a smiled fondly. I let out a loud sigh and Bella aimed a vase at him which crashed into his head and sent millions of tiny pieces of glass flying.
"Someone better clean that up before Esme sees." Said Alice.
"I nominate Bella and Emmett." Said Jasper from his spot on the floor where he was lounging, not taking his eyes off the game.
When the room was glass-free again, we laid out our plans for tomorrow. Rosalie and Jasper were to be twins (as always) and Emmett was Bella and Renesmee's older brother with Bella and Renesmee being fraternal twins. Alice and I were brother and sister and Jacob was the lonely orphan that had shown up on Carlisle and Esme's front porch when he was a baby. Jacob didn't like that very much.
We had even created our own personalities. All of the guys were going to be evil and assertive (I couldn't help but be excited at my ability to not have to be so polite all of the time) and Bella and Alice were going to be the nice girls (no matter how much it pains me to admit it; Bella was a pretty bad actress if she tried too hard and Alice didn't want to be mean.) Renesmee and Rosalie were playing the mean ones. It kind of worried me that they had both jumped at the opportunity.
"Score!" said Jacob "Let's push around some humans!"
EDITED! 11/5/2011! So before, it sucked. But now, I'm re-doing it to make it suck less. Because I can't have a crappy story on my page (even if it is Twilight), it's embarrassing. But I'm not taking it down because some people actually like this fandom and this story... so even though I hate them both and I've moved on, I'll keep this up and make it betterso it can be enjoyed.