A/N: Okay, so this was originally going to be a oneshot to go into my series based off of songs, but then I decided to make it separate, because I decided to make it a two shot instead of a one shot. So, please, please, tell me what you think, because, for some reason, I'm a little nervous to post this one. I don't think it came out terrible, but what do I know. xD And this isn't a songfic, but it's based off the song 'Come Clean' by Hilary Duff. (Old, I know, but it sparked my muse xD)
A Two-shot by: pleasedontstoptherainxx
Description: Alternate ending to 6x09. Brennan wasn't sure if she'd ever cried as hard as she did that night, but when the tears subsided, sadness was replaced with a new emotion. Anger.
Spoilers: 6x09 "Doctor in the Photo"
Disclaimer: I do not own Bones or anything associated with it, nor do I own the song Come Clean. I'm not getting paid for any of this. Trust me. xD
"Let the rain fall down and wake my dreams
Let it wash away my sanity
'Cause I want to feel the thunder, I want to scream
Let the rain fall down
I'm coming clean."
-"Come Clean" by Hilary Duff
She never gave him a chance, that was her regret.
Booth was silent when she spoke the words, unable to process what she was saying at the moment. But then, it finally clicked. What she was talking about.
I got the signal, Booth. I don't want to have any regrets.
He felt his heart drop into his stomach, having to force himself to focus on the road. She was talking about him. But what the hell was he supposed to say? Thanks but no thanks? This was Temperance Brennan. This was his Bones. The woman who, only a few months ago, possessed his every thought. The woman who, when he first woke up from his coma, was the only reason he wanted to get out of bed in the morning.
"Um, I'm with someone, Bones," he could hardly get the words out, especially when he looked over to see the look of complete heartache on her face, "and, Hannah. She's not a consolation prize. I love her."
And, then, she did it. The one thing he was praying she wouldn't do. She started to sob, harder than he thought she was capable of. Brennan felt as if her heart had just been shattered into a million pieces, feeling an unfamiliar ache in her chest as tears rolled freely down her cheeks, not showing any signs of stopping anytime soon.
"The last thing I want to do is hurt you," Booth said quietly, trying his hardest to let her down as gently as possible, "but those are the facts."
Brennan wasn't sure if she'd ever cried as hard as she did that night, but when the tears subsided, sadness was replaced by a new emotion. Anger.
"Bullshit," she murmured, barely aware that the words were coming out of her own mouth, until she raised her voice so it was just slightly louder than the mumble she was just speaking in, "that's bullshit and you know it."
"That I love Hannah?" He asked.
"No, I know you love Hannah," she assured him, "but you're lying when you say the last thing you want to do is hurt me, because that's exactly what you're doing."
"Well I don't know what you want me to say, Bones," he whispered, feeling slightly empathetic, even though she was accusing him of trying to hurt her, which she and he both knew, he would never do, "I'm trying to do this as nicely as possible."
"You're trying to get back at me for rejecting you that night outside the Hoover building," she accused, raising her voice a little more, "you're enjoying this. You want me to feel how you felt that night. And it's working."
Booth grew highly annoyed at the accusation, the mention of that night sending shivers down his spine. He'd tried to forget about that night, and here she was, not only throwing it in his face, but accusing him of trying to inflict the same type of pain on her that she did to him. That type of emotion pain was the kind he would never even wish on his worst enemy.
"No, this is your way of trying to detach," he told her, informing her of her own intentions, "you can't deal with the fact that I'm saying no, so you're looking for a way to twist this around and make it look like I'm doing something terrible. When in reality, all I'm doing is being honest with you. I'm not going to just drop everything and break up with Hannah because you asked me to. Because, I have news for you, Temperance. The world doesn't revolve around you."
Brennan winced subconsciously at his words, crossing her arms defensively over her chest.
"Don't talk to me," she murmured, "do me a favor and don't speak to me for the rest of the ride."
"I thought you'd never ask," he mumbled, staying quiet for the rest of the short ride.
Booth stayed quiet as she asked, but, the whole time, wanted to apologize for his 'the world doesn't revolve around you' comment. He knew for a fact that their whole argument was just a way for both of them to try and push this whole admittance of her feelings aside, and pretend it didn't happen. He would never say it out loud, but the whole reason he took that cheap shot at her was to help her detach, because he knew breaking her heart by telling her he didn't want to be with her would be ten times worse than just hurting her feelings by saying she was self centered.
The rain was pelting the SUV when he pulled up in front of her apartment, putting the car in park as they both stared out at the rain, watching the windshield wipers swipe profusely at the streams of water blocking their view. After a few seconds of just sitting in the still car in silence Booth spoke.
"Look, do you want me to get someone to stay with you?" Booth asked, thoughtfully.
Brennan turned her head slightly to look at him, her make up smudged under her eyes, from a mixture of the rain and her tears.
"Are you serious?" She asked, bitterly.
"Bones, I'm just trying to help," he felt defeated as he looked at her, her eyes seeming to pierce right through him, a disgusted expression on her face, "you know, maybe we just shouldn't be partners anymore. This obviously isn't going to work."
"You're going to give up six years of a partnership for some woman you met in Afghanistan?" She snapped, turning all the way, so she was facing him fully.
"All you're doing is yelling at me when I'm trying to help," he snapped back at her, "and Hannah is not just 'some woman'. I love her, Temperance. I know that's hard for you to accept, but it's the truth."
"You've known her for practically five minutes and you care for her more than you do for me," she uncharacteristically used the hyperbole, "you're unbelievable."
"You know you mean the world to me, Temperance. I would kill for you. I would die for you. But I'm not in love with you, I'm in love with Hannah."
"That's not the way it's supposed to be!" She shouted, feeling the tears spring back into her eyes for the second time that night, "You're not supposed to love her, you're supposed to-"
"Love you?" He interrupted, "Are you really that self centered?"
"I never said that," she wiped a stray tear that escaped against her will.
"You were going to," he accused, "I'm sorry, Bones, but I don't love you. I just, I don't."
Brennan popped the lock on her door, pulling it open, the first sound she noticed being the rain pounding relentlessly against the pavement.
"Fine, go to Hacker and tell him you want our partnership severed," she said quietly, but loud enough to be heard over the rain, "I'm done, Booth. I give up. You're getting what you want. You want me gone? Fine. You don't ever have to see me again. Don't speak to me, don't call me, don't come to the lab looking for me. Just go home to Hannah and forget about me."
"Bones," Booth opened the driver's side door and hopped out of the car, "Bones, wait, hold on," he called to her.
Brennan turned around to face him.
"What?" She asked, hopelessly, "what the hell do you want from me, Seeley?"
The fact that she'd actually used his first name was an indication that she was over it. He was no longer her best friend Booth, he was just Seeley. Seeley. Who he was to everyone else in the world. Everyone who was indifferent to him.
"You know I didn't mean it about getting our partnership severed," he told her, jogging the short distance around the car to catch up with her.
"Could have fooled me," she murmured.
"Bones, you're my partner, you always will be," he stayed quiet as she tilted her head to look up at the sky, letting the rain pelt her face, "please, don't do this, Temperance. I don't want to fight with you," he couldn't tell she was crying at first, since the rain was masking her tears, but was only able to tell when her shoulders shook with silent sobs, "you're breaking my heart, baby."
The term of endearment made her heart flutter, even though she knew it was only a slip of the tongue, and meant absolutely nothing.
"I can't do this," she sobbed, feeling her partners hand grasp her soaking wet shoulders. She tilted her head back down to look him in the eyes, "I-I fell in love with you in Maluku," she finally admitted the words for the first time, opening the floodgate of tears "I didn't realize the way I felt about you until you were gone, Booth. And I know it's wrong, and illogical, and irrational, but I love you. I'm so in love with you it scares me."
Booth swallowed the lump that formed in his throat, unsure of what to say at the moment. Bones just told him she loved him. And it wasn't a dream this time. She actually used the 'L' word. Bones loved him. Temperance Brennan was in love with him.
"Bones," he whispered breathlessly, moving his hands from her shoulders to carefully frame her face, "Temperance, I-I," he couldn't seem to get the words out, so he just settled on the one sentence he could manage, "say it again."
"I love you," she whispered, the words feeling almost foreign falling from her lips, as she subconsciously rubbed her cheek against his hand, "I love you, Booth. I love you."
Without seeking permission, he crushed his lips to hers, pulling her against his body so he could feel her heart pounding against the wet fabric of both of their shirts. Brennan parted her lips without hesitation, inviting his tongue inside.
"I love you," she murmured against his lips, gasping when she felt his tongue invade the inside of her mouth, "I love you."
"Oh, God, Bones, I love you too," he mumbled back to her, backing her up gently against the dirty, outside wall of her building, "more than you know, baby. More than you'll ever understand."
The whole situation felt surreal to Brennan as she wrapped her arm around his neck, letting her fingers tangle in his soaking hair. Just a few minutes ago, he was telling her he didn't love her, and now, it was all he could say, as he the phrase mumbled incoherently between kisses. Feeling as if necking against the wall of her apartment building was not an appropriate display of his love, he pulled her back against his chest, separating their lips so he could just look into her eyes. As they stared at each other, blue eyes meeting brown, they were unsure of what to do. Booth tucked a lock of wet hair behind her ear, smiling brightly, as a chuckle shook his chest. Here he was, standing with his nose pressed against his partners, and all he could do was laugh. Brennan wasn't sure what was funny, but she joined him, both of them simply laughing, as they caressed one another's faces, and let the rain soak into their skin.
The door to Brennan's apartment flew open as they stumbled through the doorway, hands and lips all over one another. Barely waiting a second before the door was closed, Brennan untied her coat from around her waist and shrugged it from her shoulders, hearing his jacket hit the ground when he did the same. She gasped when she felt his hands skim down her sides, peeling her dripping wet shirt over her head and tossing it to the floor to join her jacket, only to feel her mimic his motions seconds later.
"Bedroom," Brennan whispered against his mouth, nudging him gently backwards.
"Wait," he whispered back, pulling his lips from hers once again.
Brennan paused, afraid that he changed his mind, but reassured when he touched her cheek gently. Her skin was freezing, and damp from the rain, but she felt anything but cold at the moment, with one of Booth's hands on her stomach and one touching her face intimately.
"Are you sure about this?" He asked, quietly.
"No," Brennan admitted, "are you?"
"No," he smiled at how honest they could be with one another, his knuckles brushing her cheek, "but I want you."
"I want you too," she whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the center of his chest, "I want to break the laws of physics with you, Seeley Booth," she peeked up at him, as if she were seeking his approval, "I don't want to have sex with you. I want you to make love to me."
"Bones," he groaned, slipping his hand to the back of her neck to cradle the back of her head gently, "I'm going to show you how two people can become one."
And with that, he had her approval, and proceeded to her bedroom, where he showed her how to make love for the rest of the night, finally falling asleep in each other's arms when they were spent, undressed, holding each other close, the way things were supposed to be.
*bites nails* So what did you all think? Next chapter, Booth comes to terms with the fact that he cheated on a woman for the first time. So I didn't just completely forget about Hannah (although I wish the writers of the actual show would xD). Please tell me what you think. =]