Author's Note: Some of you might recognize this story. I had previously posted it under a different user name on here, but since I'm working on consolidating all of my fanfiction under a single account (see my profile for more information) that old version has been scrapped in favor of this new posting.
Just a brief note on the basis for this story - because I live in a hick area of PA, there's no real demand for yaoi anything around here. Therefore, this story is based solely on what I know from the two seasons of the anime.
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or settings of Junjou Romantica. I'm just borrowing them for a bit.
Spring... The sakura blossoms were out in their vibrant beauty, a warm breeze softly billowing their pale pink and white petals. School had just let out for the year, and the students were all eagerly making plans for their break. The seniors were busy congratulating one another on their graduation and promising one another to stay in touch, even though for most of them it was merely a courtesy to say so for they had no real intention of making the effort necessary to actually remain in touch as they each pursued their own lives. Many cheered, some cried...
And then there was them.
Hiroki Kamijou, one of the recent graduates, stood away from the bustling crowd, completely silent and motionless as he kept his back to their frivolous revelries. He wasn't alone, however. His companion was a girl from his class, a transfer student who had only begun attending the school near the start of their senior year. Her eyes were downcast, her honey-colored hair obscuring her face so he was unable to see her expression. He didn't need to see it to know how she felt, though. The slight trembling of her hands as she held them clutched tightly together in front of her would have been enough of a dead giveaway even without the two small tears that were currently rolling down across the backs of her fingers.
"Don't," she said softly as she shook her head, cutting him off before he could say the words. "I know what you're going to say, and I don't want to hear it, Hiroki."
Hiroki reached out toward her, intending to take her hand and offer her some sort of comfort, but he stopped himself as soon as he realized the inappropriateness of such a gesture in the given situation. Clenching his hand into a fist to prevent himself from hurting her even more than he already had, he sighed a bit and dropped it to his side as he raked the other back though his messy brown hair.
"At least let me explain," he began, but she shook her head once more, this time a bit more fervently, and finally met his eyes. He had been expecting to see the tears there, glistening like dewdrops in the sun, but he hadn't been prepared for the amount of pain held in those soft brown eyes.
"You don't need to explain anything, Hiroki," she told him, her voice breaking slightly as she said his name. "You have made your intentions clear, and that's all I really need to know."
Hiroki closed his eyes, shaking his head as the voice assaulted his thoughts. He knew he couldn't listen to it. He had to finish what he had started, what he had failed to do that day and every other time this memory chose to haunt him.
He felt himself being shaken and suddenly the world around him began to blur. The girl started to fade into the distance, her image becoming engulfed in darkness. Hiroki reached out for her, trying to grasp onto her fleeting form and catching hold of nothing.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, knowing it was no use. He hadn't said it then, and she couldn't hear him say it now.
"Hiro-san! You're going to be late."
Hiroki opened one groggy eye and peered under the arm flung across his face to find his lover, Nowaki Kusama, hovering over him. He promptly squeezed his eyes shut once more and rolled over onto his stomach, pulling the pillow over his head as he groaned in protest over the disruption of his slumber.
"What were you dreaming about, by the way?" Nowaki asked as he sat down on the side of the bed, leaning over the smaller man and grasping his wrists to gently wrest away the pillow from him.
"Huh? Why are you asking me that?" Hiroki wondered aloud as he reluctantly pulled himself into an upright position, stretching as he let out a rather loud yawn.
"You were apologizing to someone."
"I was?" Hiroki asked, trying to sound surprised. He knew that he sometimes had the nasty habit of talking in his sleep, but that hadn't happened in years... and he certainly hadn't wanted Nowaki to find out about that particular incident in his past. After all, it was the one thing in his life that he actually felt ashamed of doing, even though it had happened more than ten years ago.
"You said you were sorry," Nowaki informed him with a nod. "Is everything alright?"
Hiroki stiffened slightly when Nowaki reached up and gently stroked his hair, but if the younger man noticed the reaction he didn't mention it. For a moment, Hiroki remained silent, pretending to think about what he possibly could have been dreaming of when in reality he was making up some excuse to feed to his lover that would make perfect sense.
"Ah, that's right," he said after a moment, scratching the back of his head a bit sheepishly in an attempt to make the story more convincing. "I accidentally threw out some of Professor Miyagi's research materials the other day. I must have been dreaming about that."
"I see," Nowaki responded, smiling gently at him. "Well, I'm sure he knows it was an accident. If you're still concerned about it affecting your working relationship with him, perhaps you should discuss it with him."
Hiroki nodded in agreement and Nowaki gave him a brief kiss before leaving their bedroom to return to preparing breakfast in the kitchen. Once he was out the door, Hiroki flopped back onto the bed and let out a heavy sigh. He hated lying to Nowaki, but there were some things in his life that he simply wished to keep to himself. Lukily, Nowaki was a very trusting man and pretty much believed anything Hiroki told him... which actually made him feel even more guilty for lying.
"Hiro-san," Nowaki called from the kitchen, "your breakfast is getting cold."
Hiroki pulled himself out of bed and followed the delicious smell of Nowaki's cooking, his stomach letting out an audible sound of anticipation as the aroma became stronger with each step toward its source. Nowaki greeted him at the entrance to the dining area with another kiss, this one a bit more prolonged than the previous one – Nowaki's usual 'good morning' kiss. Hiroki kissed him back, and a shy smile tugged slightly at his lips as he pulled out his chair and took a seat at the dining table. Even after so many years, he still couldn't believe what a hopeless romantic he'd managed to get himself hooked up with.
"What time do you need to be at the hospital today?" he asked as he placed his napkin over his lap, waiting for Nowaki to take the seat across from him.
"Three o'clock," Nowaki replied, his actions mirroring his companion's. "I was thinking we could get together for lunch before I head over there."
"Sounds good," Hiroki agreed with a brief nod, which ceased when his eyes fell upon a small book sitting next to his plate. The book had been obscured by his napkin before, and he glanced across the table to find Nowaki watching him expectantly. Curious, Hiroki picked up the book – a small hardcover volume that was missing its dust jacket – and opened the plain blue cover, flipping past the first few empty pages until he reached the title page.
"Parenting for Alternative Lifestyle Couples," he read aloud, then blinked rapidly as the title sunk in. His eyes, now wide with trepidation, darted to his young lover once more, and he found Nowaki smiling at him and blushing.
"Hiro-san... we've been together a long time, now," he stated matter-of-factly.
"Yes, we have," Hiroki replied cautiously.
"And we're both entirely committed to this relationship and are willing to do whatever we have to in order to make it work for the rest of our lives, correct?" he asked, though it seemed more like a rhetorical question than one he actually wanted an answer to.
"Sure," Hiroki said, nodding once.
"So, I've been thinking..." Nowaki said, pausing to take a deep breath. "Perhaps, we should... consider raising a child together."
Hiroki's jaw dropped open slightly, the book falling to the floor with a soft thump as it landed.