Sam doesn't usually feel embarrassed, not anymore. With time he learned how to love his job and the money coming out of it, he learned how to love stupid pizza boy uniform and smile at the clients brining them food. At some points of the night he almost enjoys it all, like when he's talking to the cook in the restaurant or when some kid hands him money with a huge smile, excited about their favorite topping.
So the moment he sees Dalton Academy uniforms is the first time in last few weeks he's blushing, he wishes to run and feels so embarrassed he could die.
And Sam isn't a hateful person, but if he was, he would probably hate them all - with their stupid spoiled attitude, with their fancy clothes, with their stupid party in school in the middle of the night like some privileged brats, while their parents sit in their luxurious houses and laugh to maids or whatever swimming in golden pools… or whatever.
But Sam isn't hateful person, so he just feels a little bit of tightness in his chest he can't exactly define.
He names the price and gives pizzas to some blond-haired boy, Sam guesses his age, hoping to get out of here as soon as it's possible. Dark walls and heavy carpet make him feel uncomfortable, he reminds himself times of attending all-boys school and it only makes the contrast with his current life worse.
Turns out the boy doesn't have enough money with him, so he asks someone to support him - and someone is Blaine. Sam knows Blaine. Not too well, but he gets the basics. That he was popping out in Kurt's phone on daily basis ages ago in McKinley. That they were friends, Kurt and Blaine. Were, because now they are boyfriends. And that they sung a terrible break-up song duet at Regionals… Pretty much the only performance by Kurt Sam didn't like. Which made Sam wonder why at the beginning of the school year he couldn't sing with Kurt in choir room during duets competition. What was so "inappropriate" about Sam that was apparently appropriate about Blaine.
Blaine gives him the money – no tip, bastard – and that's when Kurt Hummel, one of the Warblers, notices Sam. Their eyes meet and the blond feels even more like running away, but he just forces a small, polite smile.
"Sam" Kurt smiles back (way more genuine) and stands up to walk to him.
"You guys know each other?" Blaine asks, raising his triangle eyebrows.
They don't, really. Sure, they were friends and they were in one Glee club, what pretty much made them family, and Sam was fighting with Karofsky – but they never talked that much, not since this first week, when Sam joined. They were from two different worlds. And then, well, Kurt transferred.
"Yeah" Kurt nods. "Sam is a part of New Directions. He was singing at Sectionals, remember?" He looks into Sam's eyes and suddenly tightness in boy's chest gets even more troublesome. "Time Of My Life with Quinn. Charming, but…"
"I need to go" Sam interrupts. He doesn't really want to hear Kurt and his boyfriend talking about his duets with Quinn, especially not now. "It was, uhm, nice to see you, Kurt."
"Wait, Sam" Kurt stops him as Sam turns around. "Can I walk you to your car?"
Sam is a little surprised by this proposition. "Uhm, sure" he answers and forces another smile. It's not like he didn't like Kurt – this out and proud boy always seemed pretty amazing, to be honest, with all his bravery and talents – but he also messed up Sam's head a little bit, and being around him wasn't as comfortable as Sam wished it was.
Kurt asks one or two questions about Glee club as they go, how New Directions are doing after regionals and for their plans for nationals, but Sam didn't really pay attention to his kind of stuff lately and he isn't able to tell much – his answers are rather monosyllabic - so Kurt asks about Sam himself, how he's doing, how are his relationships – and here answers get a little rough – so Kurt, more and more uncomfortable and obviously regretting his decision about starting the conversation in first place, starts the topic which seems the safest - Sam's music.
And it's a terrible decision.
"I don't really play anymore" Sam confesses, trying not to make a big deal out of it. "I, uhm, sold my guitar."
Oh, Kurt nods, but still, looks a little surprised. He doesn't ask why - and he doesn't ask about this delivery job either. All of this probably makes some kind of full picture in his head, but Kurt doesn't comment, like he felt he shouldn't. Sam just lets out a deep sigh and hides face in his hands.
"I'm sorry, Kurt, I didn't mean to be rude" he apologizes. "It's just…"
"No, I'm sorry" Kurt interrupts. "I mean, it's your private stuff. No pressure. But…" He raises a hand, like ha wanted to touch Sam, put it on his arm or something, but he stops himself, unsure if it's not crossing the line, this big, terrifying gay boy/straight boy line. "If you want to talk, I…"
Sam embraces himself slightly, suddenly feeling incredibly cold in his delivery jacket.
"I…" he starts and shakes his head. "Just lately everything feels so hard" he says suddenly, surprising himself. "Like, my biggest problem used to be popularity and Quinn and abs and now… It's all dealing with shifts and work and… Taking care of babies. And keeping up with school and the motel room floor and these disgusting German neighbors who sound like a cheap porn" he laughs quietly, bitterly. It reminds him more of a howl than laugh. Kurt watches him carefully. listening to every word, not interrupting, even if this whole confession must have sounded completely ridiculous. Words started leaving Sam's huge mouth, like he had no power over them. "And my parents and all things we've lost and… And now delivering this fucking pizza to fucking Dalton Academy full of fucking rich boys and I…" He shakes his head again, feeling tears in his eyes. "I fucking hate pizza" he finishes, taking a deep breath.
Kurt shyly touches his arm, and when Sam accepts it, he slowly, gently initiates the hug. It probably feels awkward, but none of them cares, not now, not in situation like this. "It's alright" Kurt says quietly and Sam allows himself to loose up a little bit under his touch, hug him back, tight.
"And I hate pizza too" Kurt whispers nervously and the tension breaks; Sam lets out a little, chuckled laugh, and tears, kept inside so long, fall down his cheeks.
TV » Glee Rated: T, English, Friendship & Hurt/Comfort, Sam E. & Kurt H., Words: 1k+, Favs: 14, Follows: 2, Published: 9-20-11