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Crack Couples by Snoring Tiger

Anime » Fullmetal Alchemist Rated: T, English, Romance, Words: 8k+, Favs: 18, Follows: 14, Published: 9-20-11 Updated: 6-19-12
77 Chapter 1: Couples 1 to 3

1) Mei x Fletcher

Fletcher was hurrying down the street with a large brown bag of various plants in his hands and part of his hat covering the top of his eyes. He was in a rush to return home to his older brother otherwise Russell would start getting protective of Fletcher. Remembering the way back to where he was staying, he quickly tried to maneouver himsel down the street without bumping into anybody.

Until he bumped into a small girl.

"Ow!" The girl cried as she hit the pavement, Fletcher falling down due to impact as well. He wasn't hurt, but he noticed that he had acciently squahes some of his plants after falling on them.

"Now I'm going to have to get new plants," Fletcher muttered as he reached to pick up his bag.

"Excuse me, it seems you've forgotten about me!" The girl wailed, rubbing her head. She looked rather strange to Fletcher. Her hair was rather long and in plaits and she had the darkest eyes he had ever seen. She was also quite pretty in his eyes. He stared at her for a few seconds before he remembered to go offer her a hand up. She took the hand and got up with a sniff.

"I'm so sorry...miss," Fletcher apologised awkwardly, his face turning a bit pink out of embarrasment.

"Honestly, the people here...how rude...my name is Mei Chang," She told him in an uptight manner.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Fletcher Tringham" Fletcher earnestly smiled before saying, "I mean it was bad of me to run into you and all but if I didn't we wouldn't have talked but I'm so sorry and-"

Mei interrupted Fletcher to giggle.

"You're cute when you fumble," She giggled before turning around and continue on her way. "Maybe I'll see you around." She said.

Fletcher smiled, blushing more now. "Yeah, I'd like that." After picking up his bag he continued his walk back to his brother with thoughts of the pretty strange girl-his first ever crush. He didn't care that he was chastised by his brother for being late, he just wanted to see her again.

2) Mustang x Trisha

Mustang walked around the rather dull village with his hands in his pockets and took a look at his surroundings. Honestly, he had no idea why Madame Christmas had dragged him all the way to Risembool. Maybe he was going to get a new sister. Either way, he was bored. Madame Christmas had given him some money and had given him enough freedom to have a look around the town by himself. It was fun at first but now the novelty of walking around by himself had quickly worn out.

The thirteen-year old Roy Mustang sighed and walked into the post office so he could at least buy himself a bag of crisps or sweets. When he walked inside he saw that the only other people in the post office were the ancient-looking post lady and a young woman in a lavender dress with brown her who appeared to be in her twenties. Mustang ignored both of them as he went over to the confectionary stalls and spent a couple of minutes deciding what to buy before he settled on a small packet of hard boiled sweets (afterall, he didn't want to get pimples) and went to queue behind the lady in the dress. As he was boredly waiting, listening to the two older women chat about what-not, he noticed that there was a dandelion hanging on the sleeve of the lady's dress. Mustang hesistated at first before reaching on the lady's sleeve to tug the dandelion off. This caught her attention.

"Yes?" The lady asked kindly to the teenager. She then noticed that he had a flower in his hand and it appeared he was giving it to her.

Mustang noticed this too.

"Err, it's not what it seems..." He blushed at the feeling of awkwardness he had, forgetting to put his hand down. The lady chuckled a little before taking the dandelion from the blushing boy.

"How sweet of you," She smiled, "But give this to a girl your age, she'll find you ever so sweet."

Mustang felt so embarrased that he ran out of the store, throwing what he was going to buy onto the floor. Both of the women giggled before returning to their chatting.

3) Winry x Ling

The meeting between the Risembool Trio at the hotel the Elric brothers were staying at was initially going normally- a few insults said by Edward and Winry, planning for the future, stuffing their faces with food from the menu thanks to Edward's (almost) unlimited budget and one too many cups of sake. After two hours Winry had begun to lose control o her mind and was now giggling at the hotel wall while Edward was sitting on Alphonse's lap and crying uncontrollably- he always was a depressed drunk.

Therefore the only one who noticed Ling show up at their hotel window was a grinning Ling.

"Gah! Stop doing that!" Alphonse nearly jumped. Edward began to wail a bit louder.

"I'm a failure! I should stop doing everything!" Edward cried in his drunk state. Alphonse stood up and carried his brother to the bathroom.

"I just need to dry brother's face, I'll be back in a minute," Alphonse said, shutting the bathroom door behind him.

Leaving Ling with a drunk, giggling Winry.

"Heheh, you're funny..." Winry giggled while addressing the wall. Ling cleared his throat to make his presence be known. She turned around and began to laugh and grin insanely.

"Hey there cutey! Whatcha doin all the way over there?" She slurred slightly. Ling cautiously placed himself down next to Winry, who put an arm rather sloppily around his shoulder.

"How much did you drink?" Ling asked, crinkling at the smell of alcohol on Winry's breath. She leant in closer to him.

"Not enough to forget this tomorrow, enough to not care about what I'm going to do now," She closed the gap between the two of them as she pressed her lips against Ling's rather sloppily. At first Ling tried to move away from the kiss but Winry put her right hand against the back of his head so decided he might as well enjoy getting kissed by a pretty girl.

Edward and Alphonse then decided to walk out of the bathroom. Edward begna flailing again.

"Not fair Al! I wanna kiss 'er too!" He cried before he collapsed on his bed and fell asleep.

Not that Ling or Winry really noticed.


So this is my third list fic series. Not all of it will be humour, there will be some angst. I have no idea when it'll be next updated.

You only get an update today cos it's my birthday and my gift to my wonderful, patient readers :P

-Snoring Tiger


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