"It's Aoife today, sir."
"I'm working through the alphabet."
"We can discuss that later, Aoife. Right now I am in dire need of some mindbleach. Could you arrange to have me fetched at least a half-pint?"
"A half pint? With respect, sir, isn't that over the recommended weekly dose?"
"I just walked in on my little brother doing unspeakable things with that doctor of his. A half-pint is a criminally low amount, but I have a meeting with the chancellor of Sweden this afternoon, in which I will be required to speak of things besides the beauty of the universe."
"Noted. However, there may be difficulty in obtaining that much at the moment, sir."
"I'm afraid that the bulk of our supply was issued to Scotland Yard this morning. It was an emergency of the greatest degree, according to our contacts."
"I hope you are not implying what I suspect you are implying."
"There was an incident at approximately eleven this morning involving Mortimer Anderson, Sherlock Holmes, and the recently-deceased body of one Wilkie Stebbins."
"…I am going to leave a CORPSE in his BED."
"I suspect that would only please him, sir."
"You're right, as always, Aoife. I will think of a proper revenge later, when I am able to rid my mind of the foul images. Do you have any interim measures until more bleach comes in?"
"I have a large photograph of a kitten here, sir."
"Does it have a caption?"
"Of course, sir."
"How pleasant! It even has a little propeller hat! Remind me to increase your salary, I don't pay you half what you're worth."