A/N : I know it's been a long time since I updated this but I hope it was worth the wait!
Waiting for the day that Ed Tucker's appeal would go through was long and tiring. Olivia and Casey had been preparing non-stop for her to give her victim impact statement with a hope in their hearts that it would be enough to keep Ed Tucker behind bars and not reduce his sentence.
On top of dealing with Serena's issues with her teacher Olivia and Elliot found themselves with little time for each other and though their marriage was taking a huge hit the daren't show anyone so to everyone in their lives they were the same happily married couple they were before the miscarriage happened.
Olivia was hiding a secret of her own from everyone including her husband. It wasn't that she was afraid of him knowing, it was the fear that he wouldn't deal with the news she had to give him and that it would put additional strain on their already fragile marriage.
When the day of the appeal arrived Olivia, Elliot, Don, George and Casey made their way to Sing Sing. Olivia was shaking and Elliot held around her knowing that she was terrified of facing her abuser once again. The truth was when she had first found out it had been like a kick in the guts but as the news sunk in she'd accepted it as one of those things and was ready to face it but now her secret made it harder and she couldn't stop remembering back to the circumstances in which she was in when Edward Tucker kidnapped her.
They sat together in the small room while Ed Tucker sat facing the appellant review board. Olivia knew the chances of him getting out today were slim but then the chances were still there and it terrified her because should he get out then he would be free to run after her once again.
"Edward Tucker, what would you like to say?" The head reviewer asked and Olivia gripped Elliot's hand tight in her own as Tucker stood up.
He couldn't even look at her because he was facing the same way and a few feet in front of her but just seeing his back brought memories she'd fought hard to rid her mind of.
"I know that what I did was wrong. Five years ago a crime I committed was heinous and had detrimental effects on not only the life of Detective Olivia Benson Stabler but her husband, her children and he family and friends. I express my deepest apologies to all of them for what I have done." He said in such a cool manner Olivia wondered if there was any real remorse on his face.
"I believe the victim would like to say an impact statement?"
Olivia got to her feet and calmly walked to stand in front of the review board. She was only about two foot to the side of Tucker who she sensed was looking her up and down but she refused to acknowledge him.
"Edward Tucker took something precious from me." Olivia said her voice only shaking slightly. "When I look down at my chest and see the scars he left me with I am in no way traumatised by them, they don't give me flash backs and my fingers don't dance along the skin feeling every bump beneath them. No, my scars are in here…" Olivia tapped on her head. "And they're the ones that still affect me even today. I'd only just given birth to my son when Ed Tucker kidnapped me, I didn't get to bond with him instantly and he took the ability to breast feed from me, the one thing that I remember getting to do with my eldest daughter… I will never forget what he took from me, I'll never get those moments with my son back and when my fourth child comes into this world in seven and a half months time the last thing I want to be doing in that delivery room is worrying that he was around the corner, that he was going to come in and maybe this time kill him or her." Olivia nodded her head and she turned to go back to her seat when she saw Ed Tucker gazing at her.
She saw no remorse in his eyes, she saw nothing beyond the scum that he was.
Elliot was sitting with his jaw hanging wide open. Seven and a half months time, fourth child… Olivia was pregnant again.
"Olivia?" He questioned and she nodded and a smile filled her face.
He pulled her into an embrace and completely forgot to listen to Ed Tucker's result.
They needn't have worried and the ninth anniversary looked so much brighter than the eighth.