Mikau: Hey guys! Welcome to the final chapter of omakes. As you can see, I kind of changed the chapter titles after publishing. Omake four is now Parfaits… and five is …and Potions, since they're kind of a part one and two kind of thing. This one is dedicated to athieisademon (thanks for reviewing, by the way), even though this turned out to be nothing whatsoever like her suggestion. Warnings for antics under the influence of love potions, both KaiShin and KaiCo. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: If I owned it, the canon couples would be different. My friend once asked me why I never wrote fics with "canon" couples, and I told her: "Because canon sucks. It's all childhood friend romances that just happen. They don't develop! There's no reason for them to be together—they just are. Aoyama-sensei, great as he may be, is no romance writer." How many people really find their soulmate when they're five? Not many, and yet all of the canon couples are childhood friends. Aoko and Kaito are really the only ones I support since there's actual conflict and plot and love rivals there. That's an acceptable childhood friend romance. Ran and Shinichi? No. Heiji and Kazuha is so-so. The only canon romance that truly works for me is Makoto and Sonoko, oddly enough. They're a little quirky, but they're a legitimate couple. The older generation romances are fine, though. The Kudos are solid, the Kurobas were good, and Mouri's marriage is…they're made for each other. I don't understand why the romance in the younger generation is so…lacking. Am I right?
Omake Five: …and Potions
Shinichi had invited Ran over to "talk" about their relationship that next Saturday evening.
You can read "talk" as "slip the powerful love potion he had gotten from Akako into Ran's drink and let their raging teenage hormones work out their relationship issues for them."
That was the plan anyway.
He had prepared snacks and scented candles and sparkling grape juice spiked with the witch's concoction, leaving the setup downstairs while he went to search the hall closet for…ahem…supplies.
Unbeknownst to Kudo Shinichi, Conan and Kaito had planned a clandestine meeting at his house that day. They both had keys for that express purpose since they had nowhere else to go. It wasn't like they could make out on the Mouri Detective Agency's couch, and Kaito's house wouldn't work when his mother was at home.
Somehow, Kaito doubted that Chikage would buy the "You see, I'm not really a pedophile because he used to be Kudo Shinichi—who's my age, by the way—before he was turned into a grade schooler by this weird drug that a secret organization force-fed him. But then he got separated from Kudo by this magic spell cast by a witch who's my classmate. So, really, he actually is, like, two, but his mind is that of an adult."
While the detective was upstairs, the magician let himself in and discovered the romantic scene laid out in the living room.
Kaito chuckled, taking a seat on the couch and picking up a glass. "Tantei-kun, you're not allowed to seduce me until you reach puberty! No matter how romantic you are, you're not getting any while you're in grade school; we talked about this," he called out to his little love.
He took a sip of the grape juice laced with love potion and blinked. It was really good.
Suddenly, he felt his reservations melting away. "Okay, maybe just a little, but just a teensy, tiny bit!"
Another sip, and Kaito was feeling rather warm. "This isn't real champagne, is it?"
He sniffed the contents of his glass and downed the rest. No, it was definitely grape juice.
"Kaito? What are you doing here?" Shinichi gasped, quickly hiding the embarrassing items in his hands behind his back.
"Oh, Meitantei. I had a date with…" the younger brunette started to respond as he turned to look at his host.
The glass dropped from Kaito's hand when he saw the other teen.
"Shinichi," he breathed, voice trembling with overwhelming need.
He'd never felt this way in his entire life. He'd thought himself in love before, but no. His past infatuations were nothing compared to this.
He was on his feet and across the room in seconds, licking the back of the older boy's throat with gusto before Shinichi even saw it coming.
They fell to the ground with the bigger teen pinned beneath the thief's slender, sinewy body.
Kaito held his love down, eagerly grinding their hips together. His entire body was on fire. He needed release, friction, Shinichi to set him free from the intense pain.
"Shinichi," Kaito begged when he pulled back to free the detective from his shirt. God, it hurt, and he knew that there was only one way to make it stop. "Take me. Please, Shinichi."
"Whoa. Kaito, stop!" Shinichi shrieked, coming out of the daze Kaito had brought on with his heated kisses. Shinichi had never been kissed like that before. He was suddenly incredibly jealous of the midget.
"I can't," the smaller boy whimpered. "Shin-chan, it hurts. It hurts. You have to make the pain stop." Kaito began to unbutton his own shirt and unzip his pants. "It's so hot."
When the younger boy reached for Shinichi's zipper, the detective rolled them over and pinned Kaito's arms. "Dammit. You drank the potion, didn't you?"
"Shinichi," Kaito moaned, tears streaming down his cherry red face. His pupils were the size of buttons, and his gaze was unfocused. His body really was burning up. "Please, make it s-stop."
Akako had mentioned that the potion might have some undesirable side-effects, but Shinichi had never imaged that it would make the recipient ill like this.
"Sh-Shin-ichi…" Kaito choked on a sob. "Hurry up and take me and make it stop. Shinichi…Shinichi…"
He had to call Akako and figure out a way to break the spell or mitigate the potions effect or something before Kaito overheated.
Conan and Ran, however, picked that moment to let themselves in.
The first thing they heard was Kaito's weak cries of, "Shinichi…it hurts. Stop it. Make it stop."
They stepped into the living room to find Shinichi pinning a rather ill-looking Kaito to the floor. The foil packets scattered around them and Kaito's disheveled clothing were also powerful evidence against the detective.
"Get off of him!" Conan roared, pouncing like a lion cub on his other half, clawing and biting and kicking and screaming.
"This isn't what it looks like!" Shinichi yelled, struggling to stand up and detach the enraged mini-sleuth from his face.
"You're trying to steal my boyfriend because things aren't going anywhere between you and Ran!" Conan hissed as he was tossed to the floor next to the trembling Kaito.
"It h-hurts…" the magician whimpered, drawing his boyfriend's attention.
"You drugged him!" the little detective shouted indignantly. "You BASTARD! You tried to rape him, you sick, twisted, depraved…uh! I don't know enough bad words to even tell you what kind of monster you are! I'm going to kill you!"
Ran scooped up her enraged charge, holding him at bay while she knelt down to inspect Kaito.
"Shh…" she cooed softly as she gently brushed his bangs back and put a hand to his forehead. She looked up neutrally at her childhood friend. "Shinichi, take him upstairs and put him in bed while I get a cold compress."
"R-Right," Shinichi stuttered, knowing that he was in the doghouse. He carefully picked up the magician and did as his crush had said.
"Conan-kun, you go with him and make sure he doesn't do anything more to Kaito-san, okay?" Ran made sure that her little brother wouldn't try to attack again before she let him go.
"Care to explain, Shinichi?" the karate champ asked levelly as she carefully dabbed at Kaito's face. "Was he the reason you were always away on a case?"
"Ran, no! I really was away on a case!" Shinichi prayed that she would believe him.
"He really was," Conan added. "Kaito's mine!"
"Today was just a misunderstanding. You see, this witch, Akako, gave me what was supposed to be a love potion." Shinichi blushed profusely, looking away. "I was going to use it on you, Ran, but I didn't know it would do this. Please believe me…I just wanted you to forgive me so that we could be together."
Conan was the first to reply. "You got a love potion from Akako? Then she should have the antidote!" The little sleuth dug out his phone and hurriedly searched his phonebook for the number. While it rung, Conan thought to say, "And how did Kaito end up like this when you were hoping to use it on Ran-neechan?"
"I left it sitting out. He must have drunk it by accident…. It was kind of mixed into the grape juice on the coffee table downstairs." Shinichi hung his head in shame.
"Ah, Akako-san! It's Conan. Sorry to bother you, but Kaito accidentally drank that love potion that you gave to the idiot, and we need the antidote, right away! …What do you mean there's no antidote? …Oh…oooooh." Conan gulped. "W-Would…using your m-mouth work? …G-Good. Okay. Thanks. B-Bye."
The little brunette put the phone back in his pocket and blushed. "I'll take care of Kaito, so you two go downstairs or for a walk or something. Somewhere far, far away, out of hearing distance."
"Why, Conan-kun? What did that woman on the phone say?" Ran blinked innocently at what she thought was a child.
Conan's cheeks turned an even deeper shade of scarlet. "She said that I have to kiss him, and I don't want you two to see," the not-child told a white lie.
Shinichi (who had guessed at what Conan really had to do to put Kaito out of his misery)'s face went as red as Conan's. "Let's go for a walk and talk about this, Ran."
"No! Conan-kun's too young to be kissing—let alone kissing men! Just what is wrong with you, Shinichi! He's your cousin, isn't he? You kiss Kaito-san! O-Or I could do it," she yelled a little softer. "I will not let my little brother lose his innocence because of your stupidity, Shinichi, even if he does have a little boyhood crush on Kaito-san!"
If only she knew.
"Ran, don't worry about it. You don't even really understand what's going on. Let's just give them some privacy," Shinichi pleaded, taking her hand and pulling her towards the door.
"No. Not until you explain it to me!" Ran broke his hold on her and stood her ground.
"Just tell her the truth," Conan urged with a sigh. "You've lied enough. It's time to be honest. You can't be together if there are lies between you."
"She'll think I'm a nutcase!" Shinichi wailed.
"Kaito and I will back up your story. Tell her the truth. All of it."
"Okay," Shinichi sighed, taking his beloved's hand and promising to tell her everything downstairs.
Conan watched them go, and then turned his gaze to his extremely uncomfortable boyfriend. He eyed the pants zipper and licked his lips nervously.
It took ten minutes for Shinichi to explain nearly everything that had happened since Tropical Land. It took another twenty for Ran to believe him.
"I'm sorry. I know it's not enough, but…I just want you to know that I am sorry. I did it to protect you…because…I love you, Ran," Shinichi mumbled to his feet. "I get so jealous when you talk about other men and when I see them looking at you. God, I sound so cheesy, but…I love you. I want you to be mine. I want to marry you and have kids and get old and be with you forever…. I know it was wrong to lie, but…I didn't know what else to do. I'm just a desperate fool."
It was quiet for a long time, the silence only broken by the great detective's intermittent sighs.
Then Ran spoke: "Yes, yes you are, but…if you really were Conan…you already know how much I love you too."
"Ran…" Shinichi breathed, daring to look up at the woman he loved.
"…I'm still mad at you, though," she added.
Shinichi sighed, looking back down at his feet.
"…however…I'll probably get over it eventually, if you do better in the future." She smiled softly, letting him know that she'd give him some leeway but also that he was still on a short chain.
"I'll be the best boyfriend ever!" he promised with enthusiasm. "I swear, Ran. I swear to you that I'll do better!"
"Then…I'll let you take me on a date," she replied like it was the highest honor.
"Thank you! Thank you, Ran! You won't regret this!" Shinichi swore, feeling like he could tackle the entire Black Organization single-handedly.
"So…I have one question," Ran said after a few minutes of chitchat had passed.
"Shoot," Shinichi chuckled, wrapping his arm around the girl of his dreams.
"If Conan-kun is Shinichi too, and Conan-kun is dating Kaito-san…does that mean that you're gay?" Ran asked bluntly.
Shinichi nearly fell off of the couch. "No!" Sure Kaito had a nice body, and that kiss had been like dynamite going off in his mouth, but…he would never admit that to his girlfriend. "No way! I only have eyes for you!"
Ran giggled, patting him on the head. "Okay. One more question. Do you know if Conan-kun and Kaito-san are…you know…are they…do they…?" She looked up at him, a pained expression covering her face.
Shinichi blinked. "Do they…? What? Make out like animals? Yes. They're all over each other like lobsters in a fish tank whenever they get the opportunity. Sometimes I wonder if they even breathe."
Ran blushed. "I meant…do they…are they…physically intimate?"
"Oh." The great Heisei Holmes's cheeks turned a fetching color of raspberry as well. "I…no….. I don't think so, at least. The midget would have rubbed it in my face if he and Kaito had…you know."
The private eye's daughter cleared her throat and shifted uncomfortably. "Well…I think it's been long enough. We should probably go check on them."
"Y-Yeah," Shinichi gulped, hoping that they were done curing Kaito by now.
It had been almost an hour, after all.
Ran and Shinichi crept up the stairs, occasionally stopping to listen for moans or gasps or any other indication that the couple hadn't quite finished yet, but there was only silence.
Shinichi slowly pushed his bedroom door open a crack and peeked in first, making sure the coast was clear. He smiled. "Look, Ran," he whispered so as not to disturb the slumbering duo.
Ran looked at Conan curled up on Kaito's chest and giggled. "They're adorable."
As if sensing the presence of an audience to his alone time with his boyfriend, Kaito rolled over onto his side so that his back was to the door and his Tantei-kun wasn't visible. He put a hand to the back of Conan's head and wrapped the one around the smaller boy's waist a little tighter as he turned.
Ran cooed. "They're the cutest couple."
"We could do that too, you know," Shinichi suggested, more than a little jealous that his other half was getting more action.
"Pervert," Ran snorted, whacking her boyfriend upside the head.
"Ow!" Shinichi shouted before he could stop himself.
"Shut up," Conan hissed, snuggling so close to Kaito that particles of light couldn't even pass between them.
"We're trying to sleep," Kaito added groggily, giving his teddy bear a little squeeze and a kiss on the top of the head.
Ran's inner fangirl squeed.
Shinichi sighed. "Why does the gay couple with a ten-year age difference have an easier time of it than the childhood friends couple that was destined to be together since birth?"
"Because we're the ones that were meant to be together," Conan whispered, giving his beloved a little peck on the jaw.
"Mmhm," Kaito mumbled, resting his head against his little love's and slowly drifting off to sleep.
Why? Why, oh, why hadn't he noticed how wonderful Kaito was sooner?
v (^o^) v
Mikau: Victory/peace signs because I've finished another one. The End! For real this time. With this chapter, we're going to be closing up shop, but for those wondering when I'll next write KaiShin (since I seem to be working mostly on putting out HakuKai for this site since there's not enough), I'm currently musing over a story where Shinichi helps Kaito raise a baby that he inherited from Aoko and Hakuba. Thoughts? That's still in the works, but I hope you liked this story. It was a blast to write. Feel free to leave feedback on your way out, if you have the time/inspiration. I'm curious to know what you thought about the series as a whole along with this chapter. Well, that's all for now, folks. Hope to see you in the future as well. Take care.