It's the day before Peter and Edmund were spouse to leave I was packing my bag after a heated discussion. After they received the letter they waited all day to tell Lucy and I. Then waited until after dinner before they said a thing about it. Them waiting made me mad then when Peter and Edmund told me that I was not allowed to go under any conditions it was the last straw. Out of nowhere Emma came into the conversation and sided with me.
"Really Peter I'm older than Edmund if I want to go to help I can you or him can't tell me I can't go. I'm a queen of Narnia who can fight not some scared little defenseless women." I gave my best glare to both of them.
"No Su you're not going. I won't have you there." Peters voice ringed of no arguing from me.
"Umm Peter it's probably not my place but Susan has a point." Thankfully someone had my side hopefully my brothers would lesson to her.
"What you agree with her." Peter was shocked that Emma would side with me and not him.
"Yes you told me yourself Susan can fight if need be. And that she is a wonderful archer. You also said that you would feel better for your sanity if I learned archery instead. Well Susan can shoot well." The look on his face was priceless with every passing word that she quoted from him he became more shocked. She help up her hands as if to surrender, "I'm not saying you should give Susan a sword and have her stand by your sides. But that you let her go and let her stay with the other archers. And I'm sure if you have two men stand with Susan as guards of sorts she will be more than fine. Why are you looking at me like that?"
"I can't let her go." Peter was looking at Emma like she was crazy. That the simple suggestion was a mountain to accomplish.
"It's not that you can't it's that you don't want anyone hurt. You can't protect everyone all the time and if you try to its going kill you." This to me back at how easly and fast Emma has pegged Peter.
Peter turned to Edmund behind her, "Edmund are you at least on my side."
"Sorry Pete Emma's right as much as I don't want Susan to go I rather use Emma's plan." Edmund was shuffling his feet as he stared at the floor. Peter sighed, "fine Susan can go but," he looked at me making me look him in the eye, "you will stay with the archers have two trained soldiers near you at all times and you will not under any reason leave the archers. And Lucy is not going you're not talking me into letting her go."
"That's fine Peter now I'm going to pack and check my arrows. I am assuming you will let everyone know I will be going." I smiled at my brothers before hugging Emma and walking out of the sitting room. I spent the few days before we left checking and rechecking my items that were to go with me. I had more arrows made for me and made sure my armor fit before packing a few changes of cloths. I also had to have several dresses made for me as I only had one dress to fight in that went under my armor. It was the night we left that I laid in bed thinking over everything that was about to happen and about the past few months.
Peter had found Emma in the woods and has spent so much time with her and now Edmund was falling for Eliza. I had no one to care for me or I for them. I know I shouldn't feel this way but it was like I was losing my brothers to them. I love Emma and Eliza dearly and would love for them to be a part of our family.
This uprising was horrible news it was just over a year ago that we took care of the last group. This was a pattern since we came here every few years they would try to overtake us and we would fight them back only to have them come back. It was a tiring process that we needed to stop. I got out of bed one last time and ran though my horn, arrows, knife, and my pack of cloths. Once I crawled back into bed I made myself calm down and sleep. It was too early when a maid came to wake me I dressed in my fighting dress and pulled the other pieces I needed on to the bed for later. I then left for the dining room for breakfast.
I woke at dawn on the morning that I was to leave it took everything I had to sleep that night. I left late from Emma's room trying to spend as much time as I could with her. She fell asleep in my arms early but I stayed with her well past midnight just watching her sleep. I watched her eyes flutter close and her breathing even out. I held her close as she slept on my shoulder taking in the scent of her hair the feel of her skin. I didn't know how I was going to leave her and yet I couldn't stay here at all. Before I left her that night with my heart heavy and feeling like I was never going to see her again. I kissed her cheek then went to bed. It took everything I had to stay in my bed and not sleep on Emma's couch.
I woke up on my own and couldn't help but realize this is the day Peter, Susan, and Edmund leave. As I lay in my bed I push back my tears that I know will fall if I let them. I got up and pulled on my dark green dress that Peter told me was his favorite the only bad thing was I couldn't lace the back. I left the leather straps hanging I would ask someone to tie them later and just went to run a brush though my hair. As I set the brush down I saw the white handkerchief that Susan helped my embroider for Peter. There was vines with leaves attached around the edges a few small flowers daises and lily's. An E was in one corner while P was in another. I folded it up and put in the front of my dress not best place but no pockets. Peter knocked at my door seconds later. Taking a deep breath I went to open it. He stood there shy and uncertain, "good morning." I pushed back the tears, "morning." I sniffled then looked down trying not to cry now if I stared I know I wouldn't stop till hours after he left. Peter took his finger and pulled my eyes up to his, "you don't have to hide them from me."
"I know," I took Peters hand in mine and leaned my cheek into our hands. "If I start now I don't know if I will stop."
"Come here." Peter pulled me to him we wrapped our arms around each other I buried my head into his leather armor. He was already half way dressed to go the leather chest protector fell to this waist and his belt which was free of his sword was wrapped around his waist over his armor. He already wore his leather vambraces on his forearms. His hair was wet and his face clean shaven. His black pants were tucked into tall dark leather boots he always wore. I saw a small dagger poking out of his right boot. I pulled away to look at him, "we should go to breakfast."
"I know," he reached up and stroked my cheek with the back of his fingers, "I have a few more hours lets go eat then sit together in the library." I nodded at him needing the limited time I had with him to soak up everything I could. I took his hand as we went to the dining room. Half way there Peter stopped me, "did you know your dress us untied."
"Will you tie it for me I can't get my arms to bend that way." I pulled my hair away from my neck and around my shoulder as Peter moved to stand behind me. I felt cold fingers run over my neck chills raised on my body and out of nowhere I felt a warm kiss on the spot between my shoulder and my neck, "Peter." I felt him take a deep breath behind me, "Sorry I just had to just in case." Peters hands slip to my waist as I leaned back to look up at him, "There better be no just in case things. You promised to come back and I want you to keep that promise."
"I will lota." I felt Peters hands tighten on my waist like he didn't mean to say that.
"What does that mean?" I knew he probably didn't want to tell me but I wanted to know. I could tell it was a good word something that he may not be ready to say. I just hoped he didn't brush it away.
"It's an old Narnian endearment for someone you care deeply for." Peter's words sent his hot breath against my cheek. "I think I like it," he kissed my cheek then moved to take my hand and kept leading me to the dinning room.
Edmund was leaving today I didn't know how to feel about this. After he brought me up to that tower and bluntly told me he had feelings for me I was confused. How was I to go about things now? Should I let go and let myself fall for him I know it would be so easy. Or should I stop him before he makes a huge mistake. I knew I shouldn't let him fall for me and I should stop spending time with him. But he is so kind to me and Bran he didn't care about my past. Everything I wanted in a man he was but why did it have to be a king. I didn't have much to choose from to give to Edmund so I took a page out of Emma's book and crocheted Edmund a small gift, a hat that he could wear under his armor.
It was colder up in the northern woods and it eased my mind to know that he would have something from me to keep him warm. I wrapped Bran up as I heard a knock on the door. I knew it was Edmund no one knocked like that. He stood there in the door way with one hand on the door jam. His dark red shirt had leather armor over it and vambraces lined his forearms. A belt wrapped around his waist and buckled with a lion in gold. His sword swing around his knees and the gray pants that he wore were tucked into black boots that came up to his knees. His dark hair fell into his eyes and around his ears in curls that stuck out in places. "Are you ready to go to the gate?" Edmund asked as he came into the room a cloak in his hands.
"Yes just trying to wrap Bran up but he keeps throwing the blanket off." Out of nowhere Bran screamed Edda. He bounced on the bed and then threw a block at Edmund. "No Bran don't throw our toys." Edmund caught the block and went to sit next to Bran and handed it back. Bran crawled into Edmunds lap as he babbled with a block in each hand. "He's going to get so big while I'm gone. I'm going to hardly recognize him when I ride back." I sat down with him on my bed.
"I'll make sure he remembers you." I didn't know why but I wanted Bran to know Edmund.
"I hope I'm not gone long enough for him to miss me or forget me." He reached over and took my hand into his in my lap. "Will you be careful for me while I'm away. If something happens to you while I'm gone I will never forgive myself," he squeezed my hand.
"I will I don't expect anyone new to come to the castle and I will just have my normal duties." I tried not to think about who Edmund really was we were just two people right now.
"Peter will send letters to Emma by bird I will make sure there's something in it for you as well. So you know I'm well and when I will return." Edmund let go of my hand and laid his hand on my cheek, "Liza," I looked up at him, "I'm trying to memorize your face but I know I will never remember the right color of your eyes." He rubbed his thumb up and down my cheek, "we should go." He took Bran and lifted him up on his hip wrapped him in a blanket that Bran had kicked off. He then took my hand and led me out my door up the stairs to the gate. There stood king peter with Lady Emma, Queen Susan and Lucy. Three horses stood behind them packed and ready to go.
Taking Eliza up to the gate was one of the hardest things I had to do today. Bran bounced as he saw the horses pointing to them and babbling. Each step I took the small bracelet that I made Eliza became heavier. I knew I shouldn't give her something flashy or special she would feel right about wearing it. So a simple leather band weaved together with a small wooden lion charm hung down. I stopped at Peter and Susan who were in front of their horses. Emma clung to Peter like I had never seen her before. I could see tears in her eyes and I noticed how Peters arm hugged her to him. I pulled Eliza up next to my horse and let bran pet him. I slid my arm around Eliza's waist I felt her stiffen I leaned down to her, "I just want you close if you are uncomfortable I will let go."
"It's ok just unexpected, "she proved her point by leaning on to me. I thought this was the time to give her the bracelet. I saw Peter and Emma hugging while Emma cried Peter stuck his hand in his pocket and I knew he had a similar idea. So I let go of Eliza and slipped my hand into my pocket. Pulling it out I slip my arm back around Eliza I leaned down to her to whisper in her ear, "I have something for you like I promised I would." She looked up at me, "I have something for you too." I was so happy to hear that she did find something this would be awkward if she didn't. "ladies first." She pulled out a small piece of yarn that was made into a strange shape. "It's a hat I made it I thought it would keep you warm." I took it from her and ran it over it felt thick and indeed warm. "Here," Eliza took it from my hand and put it on my head for me, "you look wonderful." I smiled at her and then passed Bran to her so I could attach the bracelet to her wrist. After Eliza had Bran settled I took her hand and brought it up to me. I then tied the leather band around her wrist.
"I wove this band from some leather strands and the lion I got from the man that made brans toys. I didn't think you would like something fancy." When I looked up Eliza was smiling from ear to ear. "I love it Edmund its perfect." She had tears in her eyes that she blinked back for a few seconds before letting them fall. I didn't think I just pulled her to me and wrapped my arms around her being careful of Bran. She clutched my leather armor in her fist of her free hand. I bent my head down to hers, "please don't cry it's going to be so hard to leave you if you cry like this." I could feel her shaking and I couldn't help but just hold her tighter to me. I didn't know what to do so I just murmured to her that it would going to be alright, that I would write her to her when I could, and that I wouldn't take her hat off. We stayed there until I had to go. I squeezed Eliza one last time took a chance and kissed her cheek than kissed Bran on his head. I closed my eyes before leaning to whisper in Eliza's ear one last time, "stay safe my sweet Eliza you will be in my heart." I stepped back as Lucy came to us I gave her a quick hug kissing her cheek before releasing her. Lucy then went to Eliza I saw that Emma came over to them as I mounted my horse I saw all three women crying together watching us ride off.
After breakfast I wanted to spend time with Emma but I saw Lucy walking off head down and tears in her eyes. We were all leaving her here alone something we never have done before. I had Emma's hand in mine but I pulled her to a stop outside of the dining room door. "Do you mind if I talk to Lucy for a moment before we go to the library."
"Go talk to her Peter I know she needs you right now. I never want to keep you from your family. I'll attempt to find the library and wait for you there." She stood up on her toes which was one thing that never failed to make me smile kissed my cheek and walking in the opposite direction of the library.
"Emma the library is this way," I pointed in the right direction, "turn left at the tapestry then right at the suit of armor."
"Right your office is that way right," she pointed in the direction she was going.
"Yes, mine and Edmunds office is that way." I smiled at myself knowing she had a small chance to actually be there when went to meet her. "I'll be there soon." I watched her as she walked off thinking about how much I was going to miss her. Taking a deep breath I left to go find Lucy she was in her room next to her fire weeping into the handkerchief her and Mr Tumms have been handing back and forth. She held her cordial in her lap stroking the lion stopper. I went into the room quietly my boots making a small thud as I walked over to her. I sat down next to her on the floor knowing she was going to have soot on her dress when she stood. "Lucy," she looked up at me a tear stained face stared back at me with red eyes puffy and wet.
"You're all leaving." I pulled her to me letting her cry into my chest like she has done so many times.
"I know we are Lu but it has to be done. I have already arranged an eagle to bring letters home to you and Emma. Edmund is writing to Eliza so you will hear from us." I pulled her tight trying to help her feel better. "Emma is feeling better as long as she doesn't overdo it she will be fine. She will be here with you though it all. If you need any help at all ask her I know she will help you." She nodded into my chest shuffled then wiped her nose on the hankie. "Why can't I go with you."
I was afraid she was going to ask this I had to give her a honest answer, "you know your too young to go. I want you safe here with Emma were I know you're not going to be harmed. I'm going to tell you what I told Emma. I will fight better knowing your safe here." I kissed her forehead and made her look up at me, "we need someone to stay here and run the kingdom while we're away. I know you will do well with it while we are gone."
"I know I'm being silly it's just I can't help it your three are leaving me. You're going to battle and I can't go or help." I wiped her tears off her cheeks, "there's plenty to do here that you can help at. We may need reinforcements or more supplies that you will need to arrange to be delivered to us. Be brave Lu and keep your trust in Aslan like always." I sat there with her letting her cry and sniffle out her fears. When she was calmed down she wiped away her tears swallowed sighed then strained her skirts. Lucy stood she looked years older as she brushed the soot off her skirt then she stood up straight her hands at her side, "I'm a queen of Narnia and I will keep our people safe while you're gone. I stood next to her hugged her to me and kissed her cheek, "that I know you will."
"You should go to Emma peter she needs time with you like I do. I'm going to spend some time with Edmund and Susan." I took Lucy's hand and led her to the hall way, "I'll see you at the gate in a few hours." She nodded and then headed off down the hall way. It has been getting close to five years since we had come into Narnia. In this time Lucy has turned from a little girl to someone who was on the verge of being a young woman. It broke my heart to admit this but Susan was a women and it was hard to let that go but Lucy would be twice as hard.
When we came to Narnia Susan and I went from old brother and sister to parents to Lucy and Edmund. We have tried to protect them and raise them as our parents would. I tried to protect Susan as well with three proposals of marriage to her I knew they would not slow. If anything more and more suitors will come for her. Edmund was the only one I worried the lest about he only would do something reckless but could protect himself. As long as he didn't get himself into much trouble he would be fine.
My mind went through all my siblings as I walked my way to Emma. I pushed the door open to find Emma sitting in the window seat looking out the window watching the people in the village go about their daily activates. As soon as I closed the doors she turned around and looked at me. I saw the tears in her eyes that she hadn't let go yet but I knew she would soon. I slid into the window seat with her wrapping my arms around her. I buried my nose into Emma's long hair that fell down her back, trying to remember the sent, "can you do something for me while I'm gone."
"You want me to look after Lucy don't you?" She looked up at me leaning back onto my chest smiling slyly at me.
"How did you know?" I smiled down at her.
"A lucky guess," Emma bit her lip smiled and then leaned back to look at me, "but really I know Lucy is upset your leaving and I know you want someone to look after her. I have a feeling were going to need each other especially today." Today when we leave is what she meant when we ride off and they stay here waiting hoping. "I'll keep an eye her I promise." Emma took my hand in her and laced out fingers together I couldn't help but bring out hands up and kiss her fingers one by one and then the inside of her wrist.
"I wanted to tell you I'm sorry if I upset earlier when I was tying your dress." I didn't know what came over me it just happened before I could even second guess what I was doing. Her skin was warm and soft under my fingers and when I kissed her shoulder I could smell the lavender sent of her soap.
"I've had boyfriends before it didn't upset me." Wait that's not a good thing at all. What kind of boys have these boyfriends been. I must have looked confused or worried because Emma kept talking after a short pause. "I've had a few boy friends over the years but never for too long. They always wanted something from me that I wasn't willing to give them. You have to understand things are different were I'm from. But," I had a hard time waiting for what came after the but, "I never cared about them as much as I do you. Your kind sweet and a gentlemen something they weren't."
"How different is it from here." I had to know what was normal for her.
"Very different. We have known each other what almost two months and just a week of it has been while we were courting. Back home we probably we would have started dating weeks ago. This," she held up our hands, "is something that's minor friends grab each other's hands. Hugs well there common too it wasn't a big thing for me to hug my guy friends when I saw them."
"So you have kissed a boy." I couldn't help but be a bit possessive. I didn't know why she was here and they are in a while other world.
"Yes but it's been a while about a year. I take that a bit more seriously I won't kiss anyone unless I care for them." Emma turned into my arms to look at me, "things are different here I know that. You have your own rules for courting and what's appropriate and not I understand that. Things are different with you I trust you like I haven't trust anyone before." She placed her hand on my cheek; "I don't take anything lightly with you. I know every touch or change in you is important and I love that you don't rush in to anything." I laid my hand over hers and turned to kiss her palm, "you know you're making it harder to leave."
"I'm not meaning too." I wrapped my hand over hers, "I know." I leaned my forehead onto hers trying to pull myself together knowing in a few hours I would have to let her go. "You know I always dreamed of a knight in shining armor and now you're here and I have to let you go." She whispered to me as neither one of us moved.
"Well you found a king instead of a knight." I run my fingers down her cheek I watched as she closed her eyes, "I guess I will have to let my king in shining armor go and stay here and wait on him."
"He'll come back and be thinking about you." I pulled Emma to me wanting to wrap my arms around her and not let go. We stayed like that until it was time for me to go. We didn't talk much whatever was needed to be said was did silently. When the time came to walk to the gate I pulled Emma to her feet and kept her next to me by wrapping my arm around her waist. I could feel her taking deep breaths and as we walked closer to the gate they got shakier. We were the first to arrive at the horses stable boys ready for the ride stood near the horses. We stop and stood there waiting for the others to get there.
Emma clings to my hand and arm the whole time. I do the only thing that I can think of I pull her to me and hold her close as we wait the moments ticking by. Susan and Lucy arrive next Lucy like Emma had tears in her eyes she holds the hankie from earlier in her hand. I let go of Emma with one arm and hold it out to Lucy she runs into me and I hug her with one arm to me. "You two take care of each other I will send an eagle with a letter as soon as we get to the outpost." I got two nods in my chest from them both. I just held them both for a while until Lucy let go to go hug Susan. When they were talking Ed walked up with Eliza and Bran. He took them next to his horse and held Bran up to pet his horse. I then saw him put his arm around Eliza and when she leaned onto him I knew the two of them were making progress. This made me smile.
I saw the soldiers gather and preparing to leave it was time. I knew we had put it off as long as possible but now it couldn't be. I slid my hand into my pocket feeling the cool metal of the necklace that I was giving Emma. I pulled us a little ways away from my family and stopped next to Grant. I pulled away from Emma and it wasn't seconds later she burst into tears throwing her arms around me. "Lota don't cry please don't cry." She just cried harder. I wished I could tell her what lota really meant it was more than just an endearment to me it was the endearment. Lota was old Narinan for love and I do love her but I wasn't ready for her to know that yet. Bending down I kissed her cheek. "I want you to take care of yourself your still a little sick. I want you better;" she laughed a little though her tears. "You can write back to me send it by the eagle that I'm sending mine with. I don't want you and Lucy out of the castle so please for me stay here." She nodded to me, "and" I just slid my hand into my pocket. "A few weeks before you came here Aslan came and gave this to me I think he wanted me to give it to you. I didn't know what it was for until a week ago." I put my hand out and showed her the necklace the thin gold chain had two charms on the end. One of a mini replica of my sword the other of my shield two red beads separated the charms and three beads were on the outside of each one. I lifted it up and put it around her neck watching it hang down on to her chest. To my complete surprise she reached into the front of her dress pulling out a hankie.
"I don't have pockets." We both laughed a bit at where she put it I just hoped none of the soldiers saw were she kept it. "Susan helped me make it she taught me it's not the best but I hope you like it." Emma placed the handkerchief in my hand and I smoothed it out the pattern of vines were around the outside and our letters of our first names in a counter flowers spotted around the vines.
"I love it" I unbuckled my vambrace of my left arm and folded it up flat.
"Here let me help," Emma took the hankie and placed it on top of my forearm then took my arm and buckled the vambrace back. She placed her hand over the spot she laid the hankie, "is it too tight." I couldn't do anything but shake my head. I looked over Emma head solders were mounting there horses and preparing to leave it was time.
"I have to go lota." I whipped away the first of her tears.
"I know." Her tears spilled over finally as she buried her face into my chest clutching my tunic in her fist. "Go Peter before I can't let you go." I took her face in my hands, "I leave my heart with you lota."
"Be careful." I kissed Emma's forehead savoring this hoping it would hold me over until I could come back. I pulled Emma to me one last time hugging her tight, "good bye lota." I let go stepped back and quickly hugged and kissed Lucy while Emma hugged Susan. Ed and I both swung up on our horse as Eliza Emma and Lucy waved at us crying. Emma and Lucy hugged each other for support and Emma reached out to take Eliza's hand. I turned away from them as we rode off to lead the troops to the northern woods. I tried hard to keep my face from showing the hurt that I felt in my heart. I knew now was not the time to show any weakness I pushed my breaking heart down and tried to be the king I was.
So one more chapter up its very long I didn't mean for it to happen but oh well it did. I'm sorry if there's a lot of mistakes I proofed it last night at 1130 and I was half asleep. I hope you guys like it and before I forget thanks to the three who always review it makes me happy when I see them. One last thing lota is a word I made up its spouse to be low-ta. Not sure when I'm going to get the next one up I have to do some thinking on what's going to happen next but please let me know what you think.