Disclaimer: Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.
I just wanted to find a place to hide for a while. During one of my breaks, breaks I use to spend in Bella's room, I found a quiet corner in one of the wings. I needed to think. I don't know what to do. I still stop in to see her but I never stay long and it kills me. She needs rest and getting on an emotional roller-coaster is not going to be helpful. I know she wants to ask me questions but I don't know what to say and thankfully she is too shy to pry. I tried to talk to my bother Emmett about my situation but that was useless. He couldn't be serous for a minute even if his life depended on it. That was one of the things I loved about him, just not right now and I don't want to talk to my parents they were both so worried about me already. For the past year I've spent all my free time here so most of my other relationships kind of fell by the wayside. Not that I minded, Tanya really needed to go. I knew she was being unfaithful and this strange pull for Bella finally gave me the courage to end it once and for all.
My thoughts drifted back to Bella. She thinks she is in love with me but we don't even know each other. Now I am just being a hypocrite, I think I love her too. My real problem is I'm afraid. What if I don't live up to her expectations? She has this ideal of me and I'm terrified. What if I let her know the 'real' me and she realizes that I'm not the guy she envisioned? I want to talk to her but I am so nervous. I really need to man up soon or I am going to give myself an ulcer. 'Come on Edward pick up the pieces'.
"Mom I'm fine."
"No, I don't want you to stay here. I know you love me and I love you but you need to go home. I am good here. I will call you every day." My mom was crying and I knew it would be hard for her to leave. It would be hard for me to watch her go but I couldn't let her put her life on hold from me any longer. She and Phil needed to get back their life. Two weeks have passed since I woke up, it was more than time.
After lots of hugs and kiss she was finally ready to leave. "I love you so much my Bella"
"I love you too mom, have a safe flight. Bye Phil. Love you guys. Call me when you get home"
Alice had to go back to Michigan for a few weeks the day after I woke up but she was due back today.
Right now it was just me and Charlie. Edward would check on me but mostly he kept his distance. I couldn't wait for Alice to get here and help me.
"Dad, how is work going?" I knew it must be hard for him to be here every day. He loved his job as the Chief of Police
"Bella, it is the last thing on my mind right now. "
"But dad I am fine now, you don't need to be here all the time."
"Are you kicking me out?" He said with a smile.
"Of course not but I feel so bad that everyone put their lives on hold for me, for so long."
"We just love you so much Bells"
"I know" I was starting to get a little tired, being emotional was wearing me out and I wanted to rest before Alice got here. She would be back soon and we could be alone while I told her about Edward.
"Dad I am pretty tired, you can go home. You don't need to stay. I will still be here tomorrow." I winked at him. He smiled and leaned down to a kiss my cheek.
"Ok I will go. Love you"
"Love you too dad." I happily rolled over to take a nap.
I woke to Alice, jumping up and down with a huge smile on her face. I just glared at her. I was not awake enough for this.
"I met him!" What? Who? I'm just not that quick yet. She could tell I was struggling and answered my unasked question "Edward!"
Oh! What? He was here and I missed him? I sat up in bed kicking myself. Why hadn't I woken up in time to see him? I shook it off and returned my attention to Alice who was grinning at me. "You did? When, Where?" I nearly screamed at her. No use trying to be nonchalant, she knows me too well.
"A few minutes ago, leaving your room. He is GORGEOUS and so nice."
I was so excited to talk to Alice about Edward. She would know exactly what to do to make him fall in love with me. She had only been dating Jasper a short time and already had him wrapped around her little finger. I couldn't wait any longer and I told her everything, including the part about the wedding.
"Wow, Bella. I really don't know what to say. I mean, I feel so sorry for you. I can't imagine thinking my life was perfect to wake up in a hospital bed and find out none of it is real."
I didn't want to let myself cry. I might breakdown and not recover. I looked at her with tears in my eyes and asked her for help. "What am I going to do, Alice? I have all these feelings for him and he doesn't even know me. He still checks on me but he keeps it quick and then he is out the door"
Alice thought for a minute. "But Bella, something must have been going on. If you could hear me and know what was going on in my life then…" she trailed off.
"What do you mean something must have been going on? Like what, like.." Now I was the one trailing off. My thoughts wandered. I did know things about him, a lot of things. But were they real or imagined? When I looked at her again she had a big smile on her face.
"What, what is it?" I asked her.
"Maybe there won't be much for you to do to make him fall in love with you after all."
What was she saying? I am still having a hard time making my brain work to keep up with her. I am still in a bit of a fog.
"What? Spit it out Alice. I just woke from a coma and can't keep up."
"Just think about it for a while, let it sink in. I'm going to meet Jasper and his sister Rosalie for a late lunch but I will be back after. Would you like to meet him today? I know he wants to meet you. "
"Yeah, I would love to meet him. I've heard so much about him" I giggled. I haven't gone over all the details with Alice yet so I still don't know what is real and what pieces my imagination filled in. This could be interesting.
She blew me a kiss and left and left me alone to think.
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