The Best of You
"I'm nervous about this weekend Clare." Alli held Clare's hand tightly as they sat at the picnic table.
"Just go and observe…no expectations….but you are among friends…Adam, Dave…." She assured her.
"…and Bianca….i'm pretty sure she can't wait to tell Jenna….." Alli rolled her eyes. "She is trying her hardest to make my life more miserable…just when I started waking up and not wanted to die.."
"Alli….don't let her get to you. You are giving Jenna satisfaction….and by the way Bianca talks about her badly to others too. She's just a bully in general."
"Well I heard Dave broke up with Jenna….I'm pretty sure she thinks I had something to do with it."
"If you did…would it be wrong of me to jump and yell hooray." Clare snickered as Alli rolled her eyes.
"Come on….they were a terrible couple." Dave walked up to them.
"Thanks for talking about my relationship. As if I didn't know the millions of people who stayed talking about me behind my back…." He began to walk off.
"No…Dave…don't….sorry it's just that Clare was trying to convince me to get some therapy this weekend…and…."
"It somehow transitioned into me….."
"Yeah…it's just that I was telling Alli that sometimes enough is enough…and you have to drop old baggage and be able to move on." Clare stated.
"…yeah…." Dave said sitting next to her.
"Seriously. I am trying to stay under the radar and Simpson gave me one more strike. Thank god he believed."
Alli smiled shyly at the boy as he sat beside her. She had so much admiration and respect for him. He help pull her out of her darkest hour…and she could tell him anything….and not feel ashamed. Sometimes before school. They found themselves sitting on the roof and not say anything….just knowing someone was there.
She sat on the ledge of the roof…..looking down. It didn't seem like so far. Jumping didn't seem like a bad idea…but she didn't want Sav and Jahmal to win. They were already winning. They were making her doubt herself in more ways than one. The sudden opening of the door grabbed her attention as she turned around…..Dave.
"Looks like this place is taken." He was about to walk out.
"No…don't….honestly I don't want to be alone…."
"Yeah…it gets hard like this sometimes. Hard to talk…hard to breathe…." He said remembering the nightmares James had during the night…about mom and dad not leaving him.
"So…what keeps you moving besides James….." Alli asked.
"I don't know. I haven't found out yet….."He shrugged "But I am getting there."
"I know I can't forget about my….rape…." She had finally been able to say it aloud. She was accepting the fact that it did happen…and it would never go away…but she wanted to gain back control.
"But I want to be able to move forward….."
"You will Alli. We all cope at different rates. Give yourself time. You just admitted it aloud."
"Here is a list for what you need to stay overnight….."
"ummm….about the overnight….I might have to move far from everyone…."
"No you are not." Dave said firmly. "I don't care…we all have nightmares." He looked at her as she played with her fingers. Clare was looking at the two and realized he slowly but was surely breaking down her walls. He was letting her know it was ok to feel vulnerable….and he wasn't forcing. She smiled at the two.
"Clare why are you smiling?" Alli looked at the red head.
"So why does Jenna think you left her for Alli?" Adam asked showing him her twitter.
"Adam this is subliminal."
"Well you did say…Jenna walked in on you two that time when she was tutoring you.
"Dave….this is how you do the problem…" Alli laughed as he kept making the same mistake over and over again. She was usually anti-social but she did owe this boy help the only way she knew how.
"How the hell can you be so freakin smart." He said realizing he hadn't heard her laugh in a while.
"It's been a while since you have laughed." He said smiling.
"Yeah it has…"
"Good to know you got one at my expense." He smiled.
"Thanks for giving me a reason to smile." She smiled as she dropped her pencil….both reached down to pick it up….their eyes meeting.
"Ummm…here." Dave said.
"Thanks…." She said as he gave it to her.
"Am I ruining a moment?" Jenna scowled walking in the room. They were close…too close. "Thanks Backwoods." She said condescendly.
"Jenna…stop…." Dave stated.
"Whatver…" She walked off.
"Nothing happened…plus…my main concern is James right now. That is where I messed up the first time. I got in a relationship too soon...not saying that I want a relationship with her…"
"You are acting like you are old….."
"Adam I kind of am….not really but…I am a parent now. I finally got emancipated and I am the best I can be right now." Adam smiled at his friend's resilency.
"So are you going to help me or not?" Jenna asked Bianca.
"Getting back at Alli…."Jenna staed.
"Jenna get over it….Dave always knew about you and K.C. you didn't hide it very well. You don't even want him…." Bianca walked out the bathroom.
"Sav…." Ms. Suave stopped him.
"Would you like to come to the One Heart Retreat…."
"Alli will be there and…"
"No…I know if I go there I will cause more damage….."
"You need to talk to her sweetie."
"Yeah I do….she needs you more though…for once I am looking out for her." Sav said.
"Thanks for taking me Dave." She sat in her car buckling her seatbelt.
"No problem…." He hung up his phone checking to see if the bus dropped his brother at Adam's house.
"I'm pretty sure Clare is going to miss you for two days."
"No way…she and Eli have a lot of catching up to do…." They both laughed.
"You are such a good brother. I wish I had one."
"Sav does care about you Alli….he really does…." Dave looked at wanting to grab her hand to give her comfort…
"Yeah…sure…." Alli said with sarcasm…rolling her eyes. "As far as I am concerned he doesn't exist."
Dave stopped the car on the side of the road.
"I know it hurts but you have to see that you were both powerless….but that doesn't mean Sav didn't want to…."
"….than why couldn't he protect me?"
"….because he couldn't protect himself." Dave said as she just nodded. He didn't know if she believed him…but this was bigger than her….and no matter how much he kept telling her it wasn't her fault or Sav's fault…no words could make it better.