Title: Funerals in Connecticut
Disclaimer: Not mine
Authors Note: Set during the Private Practice episode "Home Again." Derek travels to Connecticut for Bizzy's funeral. I wrote this for abelfan whose rant inspired this.
The phone jolts him awake from his sleep and he grunts angrily at whomever it is who is awakening him from his slumber. He moves over and turns the phone around to see who dares to wake him up in the middle of the night. It's a number he doesn't recognise so he picks it up on the fifth ring. "Hello" he says sleepily, voice low so as not to wake up Meredith who's fast asleep next to him.
"Derek, its Sam"
"Sorry for the late hour, but it's an emergency"
He sits up, concerned about the worry in Sam's voice.
Sam wastes no time coming to the point.
"It's Addison, Bizzy's died"
"What?" he exclaims, annoyance at being woken up replaced by concern.
"Earlier on, an aneurism"
Derek sighs, taking in the magnitude of Sams words.
"How is she?" he asks, though he's sure of the answer.
"She's hiding inside a gin bottle, and not saying much" he continues.
"The funerals back in Connecticut, in a few days, I'm sure it would mean a lot to Addison if you would attend"
"You don't want to meet Bizzy, trust me" Addison says as she wrestles the textbook out of his hands.
"That's another thing, why do you call her 'Bizzy?' why not mom?" She looks at him, eyes hard with an explanation that's been explained countless times. "Because she's Bizzy" she says simply and he doesn't press her further.She's your ex mother in law" says Meredith, breaking Derek's concentration as his mind wrestles with what tie he should take to wear.
"Hmmm?" he says distractedly.
"Your ex mother in law" she repeats. "Why do you have to go?"
"She was my mother in law for eleven years, Meredith. I owe it to Addison to go. Plus I'm worried about her; Addison has a tendency to not cope with these things to well"
He holds out two ties in front of him.
"Red or blue?"
"It's nearly been a year" he whispers in the confines of the library.
"What?" she whispers back.
"We've been dating for nearly a year, and I still haven't met your mother"
"Why do you want to meet her?" she answers, barely glancing up from her textbook.
"Because she's a part of you, and besides, you've met mine" he points out.
"Yes, but your mothers nice" she retorts.
"Come on, she can't be that bad"
"Fine, you can meet her, then maybe you'll understand" she says, slamming the textbook shut.
It's not until he's on the plane that the enormity of what he's doing hits him.
It's Bizzy's funeral.
"So this is Derek" Bizzy says and extends her hand to greet him.
"Yes, and it's great to finally meet you" he says, feeling awkward in his suit and tie. Bizzy looks him up and down, giving him the once over.
"Yes, I suppose you'll do" she says, and excuses herself to make a drink.
When the plane touches down in Connecticut he feels a nervous twinge in his chest. He hasn't seen Addison since she came over to help with Mark's daughter and even then he only saw her for a couple of minutes. He feels guilty that he hasn't kept in touch.
"So your parents don't mind you staying here?" says Mark, head deep inside the liqueur cabinet.
"My parents don't care what I do" Addison replies. Derek hits her playfully on the arm.
"They do, you just can't see it"
"No, the Captains too busy entertaining his secretaries and Bizzy's too busy pretending not to notice"
Mark emerges from the cabinet with a bottle of scotch and a wicked grin, and proceeds to pour them all a drink.
"Well here's to the Hamptons, Bizzy, and the Captain. Cheers"
The church is packed when he arrives, but he doesn't see Addison anywhere. He finds a seat near the back and settles down to pay his respects.
"You're going to have to tell her soon you know" he says one day when they're lying in bed.
"I don't want to tell her" Addison says, fingers touching the new engagement ring that Derek had placed on her finger a few days ago.
"She won't approve" comes Addison's blunt response.
"Of course she'll approve, she likes me" he pauses. "She does like me doesn't she"
As the remaining guests file in he finally spots Addison, sitting in the front sandwiched between Archer and Sam. She looks as he expected her to, neatly presented with emotion in check. She doesn't notice him until she stands up to deliver the eulogy, and acknowledges his presence with a slight nod of her head. She delivers the eulogy perfectly, just like he knew she would.
"It was a lovely service" Bizzy says after the vows had been said and Addison was making the rounds.
"Thank you Bizzy, I'm glad you enjoyed it" Derek says. There's a pause and Derek sees her glance at Addison. "She looks beautiful doesn't she?" he says.
"Yes, she really does" Bizzy says and Derek detects a look of pride in her eyes.
It isn't until the funeral ends that he finally gets the chance to speak to Addison. She stands at the front flanked by Sam and Archer. He greets her with a warm smile.
"Hey Addison" she greets him with a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes.
"Hey Derek, thank you for coming"
He reaches out to her and takes her into his arms.
"I'm sorry" he whispers in her ear.
"Thank you" she whispers back.
"So, what did you buy my daughter for your first wedding anniversary?"
"Bizzy" Addison warns.
"What? You didn't forget did you Derek?"
"No Bizzy, I didn't forget" Derek says and lifts Addison's hair away from her ears.
"Very nice" Bizzy says. "Diamond?"
"Of course, nothing but the best"
He doesn't see Addison until later at the house where he's making small talk with people that he used to know. He sees her run down the stairs stifling back tears. He excuses himself and follows her outside.
"Addison" he shouts out after her "Addison!" "Addison wait!"
At his words she stops and bends double with tears.
"Not now Derek" she manages to choke out.
"Hey, hey" he rushes over to her and puts his arms around her. She stands up straight, still choking back tears.
"Not now, you don't understand" she exclaims.
"Help me then Addie, help me to understand" he says holding her tightly.
"Its my mother" she blurts out.
"I know Addie, I know"
"No, you don't know!"
He moves his hand up to stroke her hair lightly.
"Tell me then, tell me"
"Yes you can, you can tell me anything"
The sobs subside a little at his words and she grips onto him.
"It wasn't an aneurism"
He removes his arms and looks her straight in the eye.
"What are you saying"
"She killed herself"
"Where's Derek?" Bizzy says. "He hasn't been up here for months"
"He's busy…..with work"
"He seems to be busy a lot lately"
"Its just work"
"He's always been busy with work, but never too busy to make time for his own family"
"It was Susan" she explains. "She was in a relationship with her"
He takes her hand.
"I had no idea"
"I found out months ago, she came to LA and I found out then"
"Wow" he breathes.
"I've only told Archer, and Sam. No one else knows"
"Oh Addie" he says, and holds her hand tightly.
"She made a mistake"
"She slept with my best friend Bizzy, that's a pretty big mistake"
Bizzy sighs, choosing her words carefully.
"You were being distant"
"Is that what she said?"
"She didn't have to say it, you haven't been up here for almost a year"
"I've been busy with work"
"You never used to be too busy for your own family"
They stay sitting together for almost an hour. Addison silently crying while Derek holds her.
"I have to get back in there" she says."Sam and the others will be wondering where I am"
"You don't have to go back in there if you're not ready"
"I am, I have to be" she smiles wryly at Derek. "I have to go back"
"So you're back with him?"
"Yes Bizzy we're back together"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You messed up Addison, you really messed up"
"I know that! I don't need a lecture, especially not from you"
"I have to go; I've got to be back in Seattle"
Addison's calmer now, and has her emotions back in check.
"Thank you for coming"
He takes her into his arms for the last time and gently kisses her cheek.
"I'm at the other end of the phone, if you need me"
She nods her understanding and he releases her.
"I'm glad you were able to forgive Addison for her mistake" Bizzy says over dinner.
"Bizzy" Addison says with a warning tone.
"I'm just saying!" she exclaims.
"Well don't just say"
"Derek it's good to see you again"
On the plane ride home he feels guilty for not keeping in touch with Addison. He had no idea that Bizzy was in a relationship with Susan. He sighs, knowing that Addison must have found that difficult to take in. He's glad that he made it to the funeral though, it gave him his last chance to say goodbye.
Goodbye to Bizzy.