"I have a bad feeling about this"
"Man, that movie was bad," Methos grumbled as he and MacLeod made their way out of the theatre and through a throng of incoming people. Some of them were dressed in robes and carried lightsaber replicas. "Poor fools," he muttered. "Hey MacLeod, you think they'll like it so much afterwards?"
Duncan considered some bounty hunters charging past him. "I don't think it'll make a dent in the sales. These people will like it no matter what."
"But there was no story!" Methos said, exasperated. "There was a speeder chase, a few forced romantic moments, a great battle, some cliched re-hashed lines and a few flat jokes."
"The effects were nice," MacLeod said after a moment's thought.
"Yeah," Methos mused. "I did like those really tall alien guys. I hope they're in Men in Black II"
"The acting wasn't bad either," MacLeod reminded him.
"Would have been good if the script was better," Methos said contemptuously. "And don't tell me you believe that a highly intelligent young woman, who used to be a queen before she became a senator, would fall in love with that arrogant, infantile, annoying troubled teenager!"
"He did play 'troubled teenager' pretty good."
"'Cause he's had lots of practice doing just that on 'Higher Ground'."
"What's that?" MacLeod asked.
"It's a TV series in which he played a troubled teenager," Methos explained.
"Oh." MacLeod tried to think of something positive to say and failed. "Methos, wasn't there anything in this movie that made it worth seeing?"
"Well," Methos pondered. "I did finally figure out what Yoda is."
"Oh, what's that?"
"He's a Gummie Bear!"
- fin -
Disclaimer: Rysher: Panzer/Davis owns Methos and MacLeod. I am no one. They are everything.
George Lucas owns Yoda as well as the never-mentioned movie that so totally disappointed me.
Gone, gone are the days when the characters meant something.
When I sat in the theatre waiting for the movie to start I thought "I have a bad feeling about this."
I was right.