Name: Whatever you feel like calling me. Doesn't matter; however, if it is bad and I get wind of it... (you have been warned.)

Age: 21. Two decades down, who knows how many more left. Gods I feel old. (January 27th)

Gender: Male and proud of it

Occupation: Professional couch ninja. Also known as a P.C.N. Now with new new position! I am still a P.C.N. it now stands for a Professional College Ninja! WOOHOO!

Likes: Sleeping and paintball and fanfics. Oh and ramen. That last one is particularly important. I am particularly fond of GS and Fire Emblem fics. Specifically YzackxShiho and the such. I also like it when there is large quantities of Gundam butt pwnage going on. Go massive explosions!

More recently I've begun to enjoy Naruto fics. Their fun, well written and down-right hilarious. What's not to like? However, I must write this as it is very true:

Naruto fanfics are over populated by yaoi, primarily NaruSasu. If you believe me put this on your profile.
By Order of ChaosLink

Dislikes: Homework, waking up early, and anyone who deliberately harms women. You do it and I see it, you are in for a very painful death. Athrun x Kira. They aren't gay! All of you who think they are, get your minds out of the gutter. Whatever happened to two guys being good friends, huh? Oh, and Yaoi. I mean, if you like it, that's cool. But can you at least be mature about it. Seriously...

Dreams: Depends on how much you're willing to pay me... to tell you, that is.

A note on writers:

As a group, I would say that those who write fanfiction are some of the most driven and creative people that I know. They spend hours toiling over a computer, spell checking, creating, destroying and remaking their work and then posting it on this site for the masses to read. It is a monument to their dedication, their drive, their will to create and design. And yet, people on this site, little, inept idiots, who have no sense of politeness or, as I have come to believe, morals, lurk in wait, ready to tear down what these fine writers have exhausted themselves building up. The demean and insult, jab and mock. They are in every sense of the term, horrible beings not fit to lick the boots of the writers they insult. The are trash, worthy of no pity or mercy. Such people do not deserve the gifts that the multitude of fanfic authors produce with their toils. So I must ask anyone who reads this: what are you to the people whom you review? Are you a monster, a destroyer of works and gifts given? Or are you someone who is constructive, helpful, kind to those who have given us readers a little piece of themselves? The writers have given us so much. It is the least we can do to thank them for it. So, next time you think about insulting a writer, ask yourself: "Is this what I am? Am I so petty that I will insult another's work simply because I can?" If the answer is yes, then you are a sad, sad being who is not even worthy of being on this site.

I am here for my own reasons, some of which I am not at liberty to discuss. I enjoy reading fics and I like to peruse and see what's new (in other words, it gives me an excuse to hack onto my neighbors internet, since I lack it).

My life is fairly boring and on the whole, I would gladly spend most of it here, on my couch, reviewing the works of other artists. I write a little my self, but only when the mood takes me. First and foremost thing in my life right now is to make it through collage in one piece. And let me tell you, that takes some doing. Papers are the work of some sadistic god.

And to all I have given reviews: if you are insulted in any way, shape or form, feel free to rage at me in one way or another. I will humbly apologize and try to not be so bad next time. And to all flamers out there: I HATE YOU TOO!

Rant complete. Shutting down now.

Ah... it has been long since I updated this. Not much new happening, other than I'm now rather attached to Yu-Gi-Oh GX fics...

As to anyone reading this, I can assure you that your life is likely much more interesting than mine. In other words, it's not really even worth glancing at this...

Favorite quotes and other random crap:

Jesus saves. The rest of you take damage.

It isn't paranoia if they're actually out to get you.

Bomb squad member: If you see me running, try to keep up.

A Friend: "Three words: Fck. Yo. Couch."

Same Friend: "Beware of the Space Cougars and their Laser Paws!"

From SPARTAN-251:

If life gives you lemons, make apple juice. Then sit back and watch at the world wonders how you did it. (That kinda makes sense) It did?...HOLY SHIT HELL JUST FROZE OVER!!

From Hurricane's Quill:

“I’m not worthy of being a Father.” He continued crying.

“Yeah, and you don’t have the equipment to be a mother, either.”

“What?”

“Sorry. That’s a small, religious joke. Let’s go.”

From Case13:

"Women." He said philosophically. "Anyway." His eyes narrowed and the air was suddenly thick with almost unreal amount of killer intent. "My name is Uzumaki Naruto. You have kidnapped my fiancee. Prepare to die. Slowly. Painfully. Preferably in many very little pieces."

Found this poem on Lithius's page. It supports the soldiers out there who are putting their lives on the line. Neither of us own.

Fiddler's Green

Halfway down the trail to hell,

In a shady meadow green

Are the souls of all dead troopers camped,

Near a good old-time canteen,

And this eternal resting place

Is known as Fiddler's Green

Marching past, straight through to Hell

The Infantry are seen

Accompanied by the Engineers,

Artillery and Marines,

For none but the shades of Calvarymen,

Dismount at Fiddler's Green

Though some go curving down the trail

To seek a warmer scene,

No trooper ever gets to Hell

Ere he's emptied his canteen

And so rides back to drink again

With friends at Fiddler's Green

And so when man and horse go down

Beneath a saber keen,

Or in a roaring charge of fierce melee

You stop your bullet keen,

And the hostiles come to get your scalp,

Just empty your canteen,

And put your pistol to your head

And go to Fiddler's Green

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin, The Komodo Dragon Phoenix, Bust_A_Groover, Tecna, Novemberscorpion110388, Pinksakurablossom, Angelgirl18647, Winter Gallowsraven, Echizen Ryoma-san, Zaara the black, Dragoon321, Ranpuryu,Inazuma Kanji, The Fifth Rider of Armageddon,Knives91

If you think Masashi Kishimoto is ruining Naruto and agree, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. The Fifth Rider of Armageddon, Hiroshima Namikazw, Zaara the black, desuta, Reikson, D-reaper X-20, blackstardragon624, chinoodin, The Silver Blossom, RasenganFin, Raidentensho, Knives91, Kingkakashi, DarkSamuraiX1999, THE HEE-HO KING, Wirespeed91, Naruto 21, GraityTheWizard, GuyverZero, durwin, Hakkyou no Yami, VFSNAKE

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica(real name)(i always change my penname)(tehehehe) PurpleBunniesWillRuleTheWorld, Roxxi-and-Ali, IsabellaMarieSwan123, Paper Hearts and Paper Cuts, mahalo4ursupport, Uchiha-Aki-chou, MaybelleTheRAWRDragon, Chutneyispower (Damn right!), Dark Flame Pheonix (guilty as charged), XxXSand-Jounin-TemariXxX (What better way to spend your day?), Awaii, Luna2986(Done that 5-10 times XD)Kyoko Izumi, Anthurak The Chaos Lord, Knives91 (ALL HAIL FANDOM!)

If you hate stereotypes and think ppl should just shut up and stop POST THIS. Pick the stereotype that fits you.

I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.

I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.

I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.

I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.

I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.

I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.

I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm ATHEIST so i MUST hate the world.

I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.

I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.

I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.

I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.

I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.

I'm FAT, so I must LOVE to EAT.

I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.

I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.

I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...

I'm a DANCER, So I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.

I wear SKIRTS, so I MUST be a slut.

I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.

I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.

I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.

I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.

I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big DICK.

I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!!

I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.

I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.

I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all. (But I'm a guy too!)

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.

I have BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.

I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.

I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.

I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.

I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.

I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.

I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.

I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.

I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.

I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.

I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so i must be violent.

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.

I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.

I'm BI so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.

I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.

I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.

I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7.

I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.

I'm MIXED so I must be fucked up.

I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.

I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.

I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA.

I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect.

I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black

I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.

I Love SHOPPING so I must be rich.

I'm an OG so I must be Mexican.

I live in a RURAL area, so I MUST be dumb.

I'm a CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be racist.

I'm from the SOUTH, so I must be IGNORANT.

I love ANIME, so I must be a LOSER.

True heros are a rare breed. To whomever this story tells of, rest well, and know that your sacrifice will never be forgotten.

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live.
If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste.

Rest easy, fallen heroes, and know that we who carry on will never forget.