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Ishiguro Ayumu PM
My Stories . Bio Fav: Stories . Authors

Biography
Joined Mar '10, USA

bio

My name is Shiro-chan; I like ramen, cats, computers, anime, manga, gaming, and music. I dislike the three minutes and thirty seconds it takes for my microwave to cook ramen, people thinking I'm normal, and people abusing animals. My hobbies are reading, being a member of the high school band, playing games, making video games on the internet, writing stories, and hanging out with my friends and family. My dream is to get to college on a music scholarship, double major in graphic design and anthropology, and take a creative writing course.

quotes

humor corner

LARRY BECAME MY NEW FAVORITE!

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Larry stood up. The teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Larry?' 'No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'

Larry watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the matter, asked Larry 'Giving up?'

The math teacher saw that Larry wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, 'Larry! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Larry quickly replied, 'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'

Larry's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The detectives want very badly to capture him. Larry asked,"Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture ? "

Little Larry attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Larry asked, 'Dad, why are you doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Larry, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom ...'

If this brightened your day, don't let it stop here. Pass it on with a smile. Keep spreading the cheer!

Little
Firefighter

If you don't laugh at this one, you're not breathing.

A firefighter was working on the engine outside
the Station, when he noticed a little girl
nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders
hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly
coiled in the middle.

The girl was wearing a firefighter's helmet.
The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat.

The firefighter walked over to take a closer look.
'That sure is a nice fire truck,' the firefighter said with admiration.

'Thanks,' the girl replied.

The firefighter looked a little closer.
The girl had tied the wagon to her dog's collar and
to the cat's testicles.

'Little partner,' the firefighter said, 'I don't
want to tell you how to run your rig,
but if you were to tie that rope around
the cat's collar, I think you could go faster. '

The little girl replied thoughtfully, 'You're
probably right, but then I wouldn't have a siren

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going
to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of
the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up,
I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and
break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear,
in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something
to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth
and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt
on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA"You'll sit there until all that
spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if
a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told
you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this
world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like
your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY. " There are millions of less
fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16 My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get
home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when
you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing
your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I
know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your
toes, don't come running to me. "

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your
vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do
you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll
understand."

And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll
have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you".

stories

in progress

When it's all over:

chapter 1: complete

chapter 2: on hiatus

Kakashi chronicles(mom is writing these):

book 1: ghost of the northern woods: complete

book 2: makings of a fine shinobi: complete

book 3: and we all fall down: complete

book 4: (unknown title as of now): in progress finally

World's barrier: Emmi Saga:

chapter1: complete

chapter 2: in progress

The Legend of Shinzo Inuzuka:

chapter 1: complete

chapter 2: on hiatus

Demon chidren:

Chapter 1: complete

chapter 2: complete

chapter 3: on hiatus

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