28Gap Year Adventures » by A.A. Pessimal Going with the muse. Two recently graduated Assassins decide to take a Gap Year and tour the Klatchian/Howondalandian continent. Letters are sent back to Ankh-Morpork recording their progress. We begin in a place on the Circle Sea that may be suspiciously reminiscent of a certain Earth nation. But taken Up To Eleven. To be continued as two friends leave memories. And mayhem.
K+, English, Humor & Adventure, chapters: 24, words: 125k+, favs: 1, follows: 7, updated: 21h published: 1/13
The Feegle's Spog by Warner Hedgehog A cautionary tale in poem form about the dangers of getting to close to the Nac Mac Feegle. If some intrepid soul fancies turning it into a folk song, they are welcome.
K, English, Humor & Poetry, words: 176, 2/19
6Facebook Shorts written for the Times » by A.A. Pessimal Collected short pieces originally written for a Facebook group. To be added to as I retrieve them. A series (eventually) of very short chapters.
T, English, Humor, chapters: 4, words: 1k+, favs: 1, updated: 2/13 published: 12/21/2016
dickworld by Superpear8 fite me im bad @titels lol aanyway im reading mort im not even done and im already doin this shit lord help me
T, English, Romance & Drama, words: 611, 2/11, Death, Mort, Ysabell, Keli
Ankh Water by Alibi Nonsense Is the Ankh really water? There is currently a debate about this... (Crack)
K, English, Humor & Poetry, words: 129, 2/10
The adventures of a Klatchian, a vampire, a clerk, and a clacks runner by Izzyfiredragon Kent, a Drama queen aro ace vampire, Martha, a sassy Klatchian immigrant, and Jay, a flirty Pansexual clacks runner are on the run from the watch. With a senior palace clerk. That they may or may not have kidnapped. Which may or may not have happened by accident. But they're friends, so it'll be okay, right? -so yeah, writing with the ocs-
T, English, Adventure & Friendship, words: 524, 1/16
1The Rite » by Warner Hedgehog This story concerns one of the wizarding world's least popular (especially amongst the older wizards) practices and how it may have come about. It's a work in progress and hopefully will make more sense as it goes on. maybe. There's a bit in part four that doesn't make sense. It may need beating with a sycamore branch.
K, English, Humor & Fantasy, chapters: 4, words: 2k+, follows: 1, updated: 1/2 published: 11/22/2015, Death, OC
38There's nothing like a fresh pair of eyes, is there? » by A.A. Pessimal I heard an old fondly remembered song from teenage years, and it gave me EXACTLY the right sort of inspiration to tie up a loose end dangling from "Nature Studies." A young student Assassin, blinded, receives new eyes. But at what cost? Pioneering Igor(ina) surgery combined with a music meme. Or two.
K, English, Supernatural & Humor, chapters: 17, words: 93k+, favs: 16, follows: 17, updated: 12/30/2016 published: 12/7/2012
4All That Glitters » by I-AM-SiriusLOCKED Wilhelmina Turnip was a legacy, the daughter of a legend. Unfortunately, nobody had thought to tell her this until now. Being sent to the Bandits' Guild would be worry enough, but something has the highwaymen scared. "Your money or your life" is no longer mutually exclusive. There's an assassin teaching lessons. And it's only a matter of time before the ghost kills again.
T, English, Humor & Adventure, chapters: 5, words: 12k+, favs: 3, follows: 7, updated: 12/27/2016 published: 4/2/2016, Vetinari, GrannyWeatherwax, Death, OC
1 A Bright and Peaceful Night » by The Divine Comedian Monstrous Regiment. Stranded away from home during Hogswatch, Polly Perks has all but resigned herself to being miserable when she runs into an old friend. The chatty, caffeinated, déshabillé sort of old friend. They talk. Complicated fluff with tragedy in the background. And gingerbread. And fireworks. Happy holidays!
T, English, chapters: 3, words: 11k+, updated: 12/25/2016 published: 12/23/2016, Polly P.
129The Discworld Tarot » by A.A. Pessimal NC "DEATH" AT chap. 15! The Tarot Pack is either a neat psychological tool, or it offers genuine portals to the world of The Other, or it's a good way for plausible bluffers like me to earn 20 quid a reading. Or it could be about Discworld characters...NOW WITH MINOR ARCANA! (building slowly but surely.)
T, English, Humor & Mystery, chapters: 39, words: 99k+, favs: 26, follows: 24, updated: 12/20/2016 published: 1/29/2011
Granica szaleństwa by malyelf Nieodpowiedni powóz należący do nieodpowiedniej osoby, będącej w trakcie wykonywania nieodpowiedniej czynności. No i gdzie leży tytułowa granica. Miniaturka. Pre-slash, jeśli założysz okulary.
T, Polish, Humor & Romance, words: 2k+, 12/17/2016, Moist von L., Vetinari
1Mythic Smeg Opens The Door To The Arcane by A.A. Pessimal About the daily horoscope pages of the Ankh-Morpork Times. How does it work on the Disc? Building on the notes in canon, from the Celebrated Discworld Almanac, as retrieved from a privy somewhere in the city. It even has the string threaded through the hole in the corner. birthcharts of the celebrated and famous, with analysis. And comments by William de Worde and others.
T, English, Humor & Fantasy, words: 2k+, favs: 1, follows: 1, 12/9/2016
1La lumière au bout du tunnel, c'est les phares du train qui arrive » by Zoyou OS bonus sur YOLT - Lila est appelée à Quirm pour enquêter sur une affaire de sabotage; mais tout commence réellement lorsqu'elle croit l'affaire finie. OC - séquelle de ma fanfic YOLT - cadeau
T, French, Crime & Fantasy, chapters: 4, words: 20k+, favs: 1, follows: 1, updated: 12/6/2016 published: 9/8/2016
22Every Time We Meet A Dragon Turns Up » by MistressParamore THE FIC IN THIS FORMAT HAS BEEN DISCONTINUED. IT HAS BEEN FINISHED UNDER THE TITLE "THE SAMUEL VIMES CHRONICLES: EVERY TIME WE MEET A DRAGON TURNS UP"
K+, English, Romance & Humor, chapters: 12, words: 24k+, favs: 3, follows: 5, updated: 11/22/2016 published: 8/26/2012, Sybil R., Sam Vimes
7An Obituary by A.A. Pessimal Unusually for me, it's short. I already posted it on Facebook and the general opinion was that it doesn't need to be longer. Noting the passing of Leonard Cohen, a singer universally acclaimed and suspected to have provided the sort of song DEATH would be happy, or at least satisfied, to hum while he works. Deceased Fri 11th Nov, 2016.
K+, English, Humor & Tragedy, words: 192, favs: 2, 11/11/2016
2Light Music » by Lovelyruthie The Opera House is under new management and a new star is about to make a meteoric rise to celebrity. But what price fame? And what if that price is paid not in Ankh-Morpork Dollars, but in blood? The tale of a simple Carpenter's son takes a dark turn as the Watch pulls out all the stops to silence the music before the final swan song. Sequel to 'Seeing the Light'
T, English, Fantasy & Humor, chapters: 5, words: 4k+, favs: 1, follows: 5, updated: 10/19/2016 published: 9/26/2016, Otto C., Sam Vimes, OC
23 Seeing the Light » by Lovelyruthie It all started with the 'Colour of Magic' but now there's a new book, 'The Colour of Magick' and it's so insistent to be read that it up and brought itself into existence. Ankh-Morpork is about to be painted red...and orange and yellow. It will take the the Watch, the Wizards, the Vampires and plenty of ingenuity to check the book back into the library before the city checks out.
T, English, Crime & Fantasy, chapters: 28, words: 29k+, favs: 2, follows: 3, updated: 9/24/2016 published: 8/29/2016, Otto C., Sam Vimes, William de W., OC
4The Uninteresting Saga Of Not Very Much At All » by writing-in-red This is not a tale of long forgotten kings, or princesses who accidently locked themselves in the tower, or even of heroes banding together and taking what they want from hard-working despots. No. This is, in fact, a story concerning the absence of the narrative...
K, English, Humor, chapters: 9, words: 8k+, favs: 3, follows: 8, updated: 9/20/2016 published: 2/25/2016, Mustrum Ridcully, Rincewind, GrannyWeatherwax, Death
Men With Axes » by DrFrankenburger Mightily Oats and Mr Cutter have reason to work at a lumber camp lately raided by Elves. Rated T because I can see the potential for violence. Lots of violence.
T, English, Fantasy & Humor, chapters: 15, words: 16k+, favs: 2, follows: 2, updated: 8/21/2016 published: 3/3/2016
Černý štít by Ziriath Česká sekce zeměplošských povídek možná chce trochu zaplnit. Tato fanfiction doplňuje další důvod, proč Dračí král heroldů neměl Vetinariho rád. Nutno mít přečteno Nohy z jílu.
K, Czech, words: 768, 8/19/2016, Vetinari
4 Spleen océanique by Maeglin Surion Être un océan sur un Disque dérivant dans l'espace n'est pas une sinécure. Non mais, sérieusement, ce n'est pas marrant.
K, French, Fantasy & Humor, words: 717, favs: 1, 8/8/2016
2 Bedtime Reading by badly-knitted When the workday is over, even the Librarian can find comfort in a good book. Written for a prompt at fic promptly.
K, English, words: 289, 8/3/2016, The Librarian
9Last Sektober » by femvimes When clerk Sweetpea Hakim makes the impulsive decision to become the city watch's press liaison, she doesn't expect to wind up the avatar to a disgruntled god. Then again, this is Ankh-Morpork, where unfortunately anything is possible.
K+, English, Adventure & Romance, chapters: 7, words: 25k+, favs: 5, follows: 13, updated: 8/1/2016 published: 3/8/2016, Angua, Sam Vimes, Haddock
86Clowning is a Serious Business » by A.A. Pessimal The Guild of Fools, Joculators and Minstrels is a forbidding place and a closed world where everyone hears rumors but nobody, other than Fools, sees the reality. Until now. A sort of sequel to "Nature Studies".
K, English, Humor & Friendship, chapters: 28, words: 138k+, favs: 27, follows: 31, updated: 7/29/2016 published: 6/28/2010, Vetinari, Lord Downey, Lady Meserole, Dr. Whiteface