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for I Will Be Right Here

10/5/2015 c5 Guest
Hi, I just started reading this story today, and I love it! I just love the storyline, and the interaction between Elsa and her parents is so sweet and gets me right in the feels! ;)
10/5/2015 c5 21Yellow-eyed-wonder
Aww, this chapter was so sweet! :D I mean, the nightmare at the beginning was incredibly sad, and I love the way you handled it (very nightmare-ish feel to it, with the papers slipping under the door. I also LOVED the line about the red crayon reminding her of the blood smeared over the white snow). But how Elsa got so excited while learning that she WILL be able to communicate in this brand new world she's been so abruptly thrown into... love it! :D I just want to give her the biggest hug!

See? I told you it was going to be good! ;)
10/3/2015 c5 17Loridhhp
What a great chapter! Agdar and Idunn are such loving parents and it's so heartbreaking to know your child has a disabling injury that makes her different from others. I love how they sought out help by getting her a tutor in sign language so Elsa can communicate more effectively and her family can communicate with her as well. I can't wait for more! :)
10/3/2015 c5 64AllegoriesInMediasRes
Awww! I reviewed this a very, very long time ago... I was Funeral-Crickte back then. Since then I've changed my username, but I hadn't forgotten about this story!

It's so nice to see a story where Adgar and Idun are doing their best at parenting, when most usually focus on how they royally screwed up in canon. I also like how, at least for the moment, they're trying to be supportive of Elsa as much as possible, but at the same time not blind to what the populace may think. In RL, somedeaf people learn how to lip-read and hold normal conversations, but considering Elda's powers will only get stronger, she might not be able to get much experience with that. Maybe Anna could rule jointly with her...

Intrigued for the next update!
10/2/2015 c5 Guest
Oh my gosh, I was so happy to see the notification that this updated! :D Such a great story. I loved this chapter, it's by turns heartbreaking and heartwarming, and you do an excellent job blending the two. Very well done, and I look forward to more!
10/2/2015 c5 1Elsa Tomago
Thank you for not given up on this story.. Poor Elsa for having the nightmare; a worst nightmare since it's about the death of Anna.. And I'm glad Elsa gets to learn the sign language..
9/22/2015 c4 Elsa Tomago
Elsa and Anna indeed need to have their own bedroom.. At least until Elsa is ready to tell Anna about her condition and Anna is old enough to understand the situation..
9/22/2015 c3 Elsa Tomago
Elsa indeed need to grieve.. She has to let it go.. 'Conceal, don't feel' won't work.. It's too much for Elsa to bear.. She needs support from her parents..
9/22/2015 c2 Elsa Tomago
Oh no, Elsa had lost her hearing.. That's a very bad condition and it's too much for her.. She's just a little kid but she had to deal with not being able to hear anymore..
9/22/2015 c1 Elsa Tomago
It's a good start with Elsa accidentally struck Anna in the head.. The King and Queen brought Anna to the trolls, but they didn't bring Elsa with them.. They just leave Elsa with Gerda.. Poor Elsa, she's very heartbroken to the point of hearing voices in her head..
2/20/2015 c4 4DreamsWanderer
Gooooood evening o So I’m one night late with you’re review, I’m so sorry! But I’m catching up, so let me go right into the chapter without any more delay!

I liked Elsa’s PoV at the beginning. The start with the feeling of waking up from a nightmare was really nice and I loved the slow acknowledgment of this brought forward by the fact that she couldn’t hear her mother.
The bit of how Elsa feels the others’ distress and brings it on her own little shoulders was heartbreaking. I love how you merged that perceptiveness with her reaction of squaring said little shoulders in an attempt to take all the hurt on herself as she pretends to be fine in order not to hurt anyone else and how that resolve starts turning her into the Elsa we know, with her own little “conceal don’t feel” mantra.
I like the use you made of the repetition of “nothing”, I found it extremely effective because it gives the feeling of a haunting thought that simply won’t leave us alone – which is probably what’s going on for Elsa. And that reference of the door being slammed in her face and locked was pure genius, I adored it!

I also adored how Idun notices the sadness growing on Elsa and I loved that she perceived that whatever her daughter was settling on with that “stoic look” was nothing good at all. Loved that little bit right there, I’m being totally honest.
Her decision to distract her was both adorable and spot on… too bad the outcome probably wasn’t the one Idun was hoping for /
Her reaction to the failed attempt to speak really intrigues me. Her stream of consciousness (which was beautifully written, by the way, it truly felt like thoughts and emotions entwined and poured from the text directly into my heart) about the fear of not hearing and not recognizing her voice, about not being able to hear her joy anymore.
And did I spot some anger in Elsa when she decided not to speak after all? I’m actually curious to read why she won’t speak (technically, she could). Wait, that came out a bit wrong, I meant that I can understand why she won’t want to speak, that seems natural, but I’m curious to read from her PoV how she feels about that because you write her very well and so I get curious and want to read her! Now that makes more sense )

You go Anna, forcing your father to bribe in order to behave yourself! LOL, that was awesome, I cracked up like crazy XD The fun fact of the two girls taking the after their father, mischievousness-wise, was also amazing and original!
I really, really, really liked the final part between Agdar and Idun, on many different levels:
Partly because I love seeing their dynamics as parents and as a couple, which you portrayed really well. It’s such a breath of fresh air, you know, it’s hard to come by fics that are structured like that around the King and Queen themselves. Not that I don’t enjoy Elsa stories or Anna stories or Kristanna stories, or even Hans stories at that, but I do appreciate the variety )
Partly because I really love the acceptance you’ve been building throughout the chapter and throughout the whole story up to now, for that matters, especially because I think this is the first time you put the word “deaf” in the mouth of one of your characters. That is really impressing, and it gets more impressing the more I think about it because I’m trying to recall if you’ve used that before but I can only think of phrases you used to skirt around the word “deaf”, and you’ve done that so naturally and cleverly I had barely noticed it! So great job, dear one, you’ve truly surprised me and I couldn’t be more happy about it! I’m so proud of you 3
Partly because I have really enjoyed Idun’s PoV and how admitting the problem helps her plan out their future moves, I thought that was really well-structured. Totally support the decision of having Anna moving, and I loved that bit of conversation they had about whether or not magic could help “fix” Elsa.
And that ending scream was such a cliffhanger!

So now I’m all caught up with your story, and I notice that this is also the last chapter you’ve updated. The “Review Extravaganza ticket” is valid for the whole story, even if it’s WIP. Are you planning to write more or are you leaving this as it is?
Looking forward to hear from you, dearie, and once again GREAT JOB!
Talk to you soon )
2/11/2015 c3 DreamsWanderer
Aaaaaand it’s me again! And I’m terribly late with this. Oh well, such is life, I guess… and I’m here now!
So as you said it yourself in the notes, there’s not a whole lot going on in this chapter because it’s centered around the character development. But, if I may say so, IT’S ONE HELL OF A CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!

I enjoyed Elsa’s PoV. And I LOVED the description of how she feels her powers acting weird – this is beginning of her turning them into her worst enemy, isn’t it? It’s quite a trigger you managed to weave in there, I’m really impressed!
I like how she understands what her parents are trying to do because just how clever she is, even if she’s only eight years old.
Also I really, really like the movement you’ve built, how her thoughts begin piling up one on top of each other, her frustration growing each time. First the worry of her powers being all weird, then the thoughts about how Anna wasn’t getting attention from her parents which eventually leads to the sadness (followed by the anger and the fear) of the memories of their times together being taken from her sister’s mind (loved the ice skating one in particular, that really broke my poor little heart!). I also really adored how you never forget descriptions nor physical feelings during this stream of consciousness (the ache in her chest, for instance). Then the resolve to go and tell Anna how sorry she is which is immediately taken back – and here we have Elsa thinking solely of what’s best for her sister and IT IS SO UNBEARABLY SWEET, UNBEARABLY I TELL YOU! And now Elsa’s crying (so I’m crying!) as the extent of her “impairment” settles in, which is brought to her attention because now she can’t hear Anna anymore. *ohdon’tmindmeI’mjustmeltingoverherebutI’llbebackinamoment*
And the frustration triggers the powers, which consequently trigger her decision of “staying away from her for a while” – a while that will turn into years. And the need to be careful with her powers leads to more thoughts about Anna, which only remind her how she can’t be with her, which lead to hatred towards her powers (which is what will prompt her to question herself in the end). And here we have her outbreak.

I like how you stayed on Idun for the following piece and how motherly you managed to portray her. The perceptiveness she shows towards Elsa’s growing (concealed, but growing) anxiety and her feelings about the silence surrounding the castle were so heart wrenching, especially for the way she forces herself to accept the silence, steeling herself against it to bear it with her daughter.
I like how Agdar resonates with her but also helps her reason, stopping her when she wants to barge into Elsa’s room (and can we talk about the physical actions Idun performs, because you’ve managed to paint the picture perfectly – how abrupt and sudden her actions were, how she goes from being kind of lost into her own worries to snapping into full attention as she hears Elsa’s softest cry). He probably understands how she’s feeling, but he also knows Elsa and the fact that he’s probably used to containing himself (because, you know, he’s the KING) prompt him to understand that she also needs to freak out a moment on her own.
And boy did Elsa freak out O.O but again, that’s understandable and I also like how you described her passed out on the floor of her torn-apart room.
I melted for good at the ending. IDUUUUUNNN!

Alright, now that I’m all wrecked by feels and with tears in my eyes I think I can call this a review XD
But this was insanely good, dearie! I can’t wait to read (and review) the rest D
‘Till next chapter!
1/24/2015 c2 DreamsWanderer
Hello, dear one! This is Clarisse from Tumblr – again! – carrying out her reviewing mission!

Aaaaaaaaand I’m crying. I’m literally in tears. And of all the things I’ve reviewed this far (and if you follow me you know there’s been quite a few of them) this is the first one that truly brought me down in tears. I don’t even know if or how I’ll be able to piece this review together because I’m so very overwhelmed.
BUT THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL.
Okay, let’s give it a try!

I really really liked Gerda’s PoV at the beginning, especially because of the practical aspect of her thoughts (the innuendo at how taxing her work in the palace can get). I love how she didn’t falter when she saw Elsa’s magic because it does tell how much she, too, loves her, powers or no powers. And I know it’s a bit of a headcanon taken for granted, but I love seeing it in there in front of such a disturbing display of her powers. And the overwhelming relief she feels when she picks up on her heartbeat is so moving!
And I love how Kai never EVER loses his calm and reassuring demeanor.

The reaction of Idun and Agdar at what has happened to Elsa was astounding. I love that “The Queen asked hysterically” because it really hit me with a whole ton of motherly feels, which built up even more in the following paragraph, when she realizes that Elsa is not hearing a thing they say. It’s heart-wrenching, just like her decision of acting strong for her sweet little baby girl. OMG I NEED A MOMENT.

Also, great explanation of what happened to Elsa’s ears because of the ice and how she put her hands over them when she was hearing the voices. And that is so original too! I really really can’t wait to see what you’re leading up to with it! And I’m anxious. REALLY anxious. And so heartbroken at the scene of Elsa hitting her ears, desperately trying to understand why they’re not working (AMAZING PIECE, btw!).
And aaaaaaaaaaaw, she curled against her mother! I need to go back crying because this is too much T-T

The idea of writing is great and you’ve been able to blend it into the fic wonderfully! It flows natural and, somehow, you’ve been able to weave descriptions and stream of consciousness in there as well, which is so incredible! *bows to you*
I loved Idun’s reaction when Elsa wrote “I’m sorry”. So much love right there, so much love. And I adored how she immediately asked of Anna as soon as she was able to get her bearings! That was so utterly sweet and IC, especially when you backed it up with the sentence “Leave it to Anna to be the one that makes her smile”.
And the final hug. THE. FINAL. HUG.

Alright, I’m in tears again so I think I’m done right now!
But I really want to make clear that this chapter is a masterpiece. I mean it. Well-balanced, very well-written, full of images and so, so many feels. A masterpiece.
Can’t wait to read more to see what you’ve got in store!
’Till next chapter D
1/22/2015 c4 chocolate-geometry-fics
Ohhh this is so sad but perfect! Keep updating
12/29/2014 c1 DreamsWanderer
Hello, dearie! This is Clarisse from Tumblr (not that hard to guess since I have the same nickname and profile image, but oh well) here to carry out her reviewing mission!

Ooooh, so you have a What If – Elsa stays behind when they take Anna to the trolls to heal her. Well, dear one, this is so damn interesting and so damn original (and so well written, if I may add)! This is fascinating, seriously, I’m so curious now I’m squirming and freaking out! XD
Okay, okay, no, let’s keep it cool, let’s keep it down, let’s keep control. Conceal-don’t-feel.
….no I can’t.
I AM SO IN LOVE WITH YOUR IDEA!
Okayokayokay, seriously now! You haven’t signed up for flailing, you’ve signed up for a review. Let’s get started.

I really like the spot you’ve put Elsa into, especially the confusion at the beginning. Her parents might have been worried about the growth of her powers, but she wasn’t, so this accident comes right out of the blue for her. She was trusting her powers and now that they’ve betrayed her she got entangled in a loop of confusion and anxiety and fear. AND YOU HAVE PORTRAYED ALL OF THIS SO WONDERFULLY. All the questions crowding her mind, one more disturbing than the other. The way her parents (ESPECIALLY her father) turn a cold shoulder on her is astounding. I know many in the fandoms prefer to portray them unconditionally loving Elsa, but to tell you the truth I like your take better: they do love her (as the pain expression that flickers across her father’s face shows), but they are afraid of her because she’s a bit different, and I think you’ve showed it really well in their choice not to take her along (maybe they didn’t want anymore troubles, maybe they didn’t want her there because they’re meaning to ask the trolls a way to keep her powers in check taking the matter in their own hands).
I like the maturity you’ve poured into her when she tells Gerda to leave her alone at the window, especially for the reference to how she does outrank everyone in the castle – safe for her parents. It tells me that she knows she’s heir to the throne, but the fact that she also uses this only to wait until she can see how her sister is also tells me that she’s not abusing her rank, which is very Elsa-ish to me.
I love how she stares in confusion at the frost beginning to swallow her room because it shows exactly how deep the fear is getting into her. That blast of winter magic was an accident, but it placed a dangerous seed in her mind that has entirely shattered that natural control she had over her powers. The voice she begins to hear in her mind is the perfect personification of her fear and I ADORE it. I know, it sounds mean, but it’s intense and plausible. I’m really curious to see how it will play out in the rest of your fiction (to get even more in detail: the way you’ve written her sequence of “stop it”s, without spaces in there, took my breath away – just so you know)!
One last thing: I LOVE how she cries out Anna’s name. I just love it. It gave me chills and put tears in my eyes. This is so INTENSE.

Your descriptions are wonderful: the “porcelain-like cheeks” with tears streaming down, the “harsh cold winter” stirring within her, the “soft, delicate patterns” of the frost blooming in her room, the look in “those sad eyes” that she begins to fear because of “the way it made her feel”, the “blood-curdling scream”. Wonderful, beautiful descriptions.
And the way you have highlighted certain words was perfect (I’m not talking about the format, just the timing, which is spot on!), as were your language and punctuation, all combining into a very fluent prose which is a real pleasure to read, my dear!

Can’t wait to get to the next part, I’m so curious and happy right now!
’Till next chapter, dearie!
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