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for Light Up The Sky: The 30th Hunger Games

12/30/2014 c16 3jacob1106
my guess is memrie and briar, I hope Porter was easily the best and most memorable of the three.
12/29/2014 c16 Guest
I don't think Rian should have died that quickly, you said you killed him for his refusal to play the game, which means he wouldn't have attacked Xander. I don't think that's a good enough, or realistic enough reason to kill him he was a fighter and I feel should have made it farther, what was the point of giving him an 7 just to kill him? I don't know, I'm just not a fan of how all the high scoring tributes are dying, while all the low scoring tributes are perfectly alright.

it's just one opinion but I think the order that you're killing them in is wrong. are you killing characters because YOU want them to die because you like writing other characters more? or are you killing them because that's how the actual story would go?

frankly I think you're keeping all the weak tributes alive because you like them more. not because they'd do better.
12/29/2014 c16 2Call Me Fin
I got a random boost of 3 am energy so here I am reviewing anyways :)

Sienna: Sienna is literally kitty, like everything about her just reminds me of kitty, but a little bit more annoying;) If it wasn't for the colors, and this aura, Sienna might not actually be that bad, but as of right now she's just not for me.

Xander: Idk his personality bores me? There's just nothing exciting or new to me about him? He has a nice name and face claim but he's done nothing to impress me in the capitol or the games so far. He's definitely a threat, he's proved he can and will kill, but yeah I don't like him.

Pstika: Jake was right you killed off all the interesting careers? Actually I like Laela and Adrian but Pstika can just go away. First off that name I will never get over like what, and why is he leaving the others? You weren't treated well but at least you had numbers? Now you're gonna go off and get yourself killed which is fine by me but still.

Pomme: Finally a POV, and it was worth the wait! She's so great and manipulative and evil I love it! Unfortunately she is twelve, so I would guess she's going to die right soon, but she'll be fun to watch for the time being!

Leon: Leon has really gone down hill, during the Esrly Capitol I liked him but as the story has gone on he has began to bore me. Like if Keighly wasn't there, I feel like I would have no idea who he was? Speaking of Keighly she is getting really annoying like the girl needs to calm down? Idk I liked these two but not so much any more :/

Chandler: I feel like this review is so rude but Chandler is another one I don't like, and my least favorite member of this alliance, or used to be at least. Again he's remembered because who he's aligned with, but now I presume he's on his own so guess he'll probably get boring and have no idea what to do with himself? I think he'll die soon if not already.

Porter: I've always liked Porter, and wow what this POV was wild through and through. Naomi what are you doing child? These are your allies? Poor Porter :/ I'm gonna assume he's dead because at the end of his POV he have up so idk but I didn't see him dying this early at all, I thought him and Naomi woild stick together but apparently Naomi has other plans.

Naomi: Baeee! Get ready for the hate bbg people aren't gonna like that you killed your alliance:/ but oh well eh your alive and they aren't sooo you made the right choice!

Ok deaths:

Rian: who are you Dewey part two?

As for the two I think died, I'm definetely feeling Porter, and I'm guessing you're gonna throw some wild curve ball and have the other one being Chandler just because he disappeared and maybe he was and idiot and tried to save his allies:/

Anyways update early pls? Im emotionally attached and don't like to wait ok goodnight sir
12/28/2014 c15 4DomiHearts1497
BO LIKE I CANNOT EVEN...! *explodes*
The bloodbath was interesting, I definitely wasn't expecting a two Careers to go down! woah...

I wasn't surprised by Caleb, Sia, Dewey, and Evangeline... RIP...

I really liked Aldora and Zeph, I was hoping they'd get farther :( awww... RIP.

I see the Naomi/Chandler/Briar/Memrie group falling victim next, maybe a Career...? Hoping to hear from Kyung and Sienna soon :)

-Domi
12/28/2014 c16 11BamItsTyler
Heyy!

Oooh, this chapter was juicy! I like I like! I reaaaaaaaaally hate suspense though, ugh. It boggles my mind thinking of all the different scenarios that could come with the fire trap.

Sienna: She reminds me of a hippie, so zen and tranquil with her constant talk of Aura's. She's really weird and I dig that. Unfortunately, weird tributes are always pegged as bloodbaths since there isn't much to them other than the reason why they act so quirky. I don't think Sienna is one of them though. Her comment on everyone who looks down on her and the Atomic Kittens made me laugh a little. Newborn atomic kittens . . . hmph. Well, Kyung is okay, nothing too eyepopping about him. I wanna know more about this "Aura"! really and truly, I wonder I wonder about these two.

Xander: That's unfortunate Xander was using Evange as an extra "1UP" just incase. They really could've been a force to be reckoned with. Oh frack! a claymore . . . who's this L guy? am I supposed to know him? Is he an OC announcer? Idk but I like him anyway. Here comes Rian with a pipe. He puts up a good fight but in the end dies. I knew that Xander had to stay on top, as he has a good story arc going for him right now . . . Rian didn't unfortunately. He stayed Defiant 2 da end and I respect him for that.

Pstika: Ha . . . who did make her leader anyway? I think she self established that during the chariots. With that 7 in training I'm surprised they didnt turn on her beforehand. Well . . . in this PoV, Sticka was like-able, mainly because I hate the other two. Adrian was cool and all, but that camaraderie has now turned into a lapdog mentality and unfortunately he'll pay the price for his suckup-ish attitude. So! Pstika made a good decision to leave the two.

This makes for 2 careers against 10 or so outliers. I predict an outlying victor this year, simply because this Career Alliance was dissolved before it began. Xander leaving, Ceira kinda had her own little background plan going on before she was unfortunately killed and the others (I.e Pstika) were just . . . there, to be frank. So! In conclusion I don't think the "Careers of 2" will survive for that long.

Pommeeeeeeee: Yay! You really um, turned her around here. Looking back at my tribute form, she would've been a BB fo sho, so thank you for beefing her up a little. The beginning made me smirk for a bit. How she goes on about "supposing" to be feeling this and that, I was expecting her to feel depressed about it after the fact, but she laughs about it which makes it amusing. She seems like quite the realist and I like it, especially with the "If" she were supposed to win part, as if she knows that her chances of winning are still bleak. The other reviewers might agree that Her means about going on about it may raise some heads.

the jackets the jackets . . . I wonder if you have an incoming Disaster that the jackets might be useful for . . . I highly think so and I wonder if she'll succeed in getting a jacket. The majority of the other tributes are disregarding these jackets entirely. All in all, great portrayal for a first time PoV (LOL), I think if you gave her out Pre-Games, she would've just came out bratty and stereotypical. Hang in there Pomme111o1nlnkm.,!

Leon: Sweet! Leon's sorta making a recovery here! Keighly seems pretty torn up about what she did and I can reason with that. Her conflictedness about Caleb and Ceira is hinting for some good development! Leon as well seems to be developing a little bit more from what I can tell. What these two need to stop doing is bickering1!1

Chandler: Are cloth the jackets? unlikely. Oh wait, they are jackets! and I was right about them disregarding them as useless materiel. Oh wait, Porter asked for them to be kept but with those faceless villagers right behind them, I doubt they'll be keeping them.

Porter: Nice muttation idea! Angry villagers, makes sense due to the arena theme. Throughout this PoV (the beginning, middle) I thought Briar was done for. I have to take time out and say Kudos to you for writing such a high octane scene! The chase was realistic and the fire trap and the feeling of despair was very descriptive, especially the ending! The whole thing with the flames and ash rising into the sky made me feel as if I were there as well.

Naomi: So . . . Naomi's long time coming betrayal has happened. This is a great developing... idk, "stage" for her, as she turns heel into a more antagonistic character and starts thinking more realistically now that she's shed her extra weight ( that being her allies). She's conflicted at the beginning, y'know, guilt for killing her allies, etc. but as I said about turning heel, that's all going to change within the next chapter or two. Will she finish it? I hope to see what unravels.

Great chapter once again! I wonder about how things are going to go death/placings wise.

So! about this mystery.

Chandler, Briar, Porter, Memrie.

Porter is out, since he ... wait, I just re-read the final scene again... Porter could've died from smoke asphyxiation.

Briar? same thing, but could've lived with her pulling an "Armadillo" and shielding herself.

Memrie seems dead with her crying out for help... Chandler? I think he's safe.

I think Memrie and Briar could've died. Porter is also high up on the list.

TADA! A nice lengthy review fo u. (Only for it to be small once I post it..)
12/28/2014 c16 10nevergone4ever
ARE YOU SERIOS THIS IS LIKE A GIGANTIC CLIFFHANGER WND LIKE I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS AND MY EPHEART IS OWGIT POUNDING RIGHT NOW and this was SUCU A GOOD CHAOTER AND I CANT EVEN

WHY RIAN HES SUCH A SWEETIE AND LIKE EVFJON NO HE CANT DIE

MEMRIR AND CHANDLER AND BRIAR AND PORTER FRICK NO YOU GUYS HEILVEOHJFVEHFJVEOHEJFVOFEVJHLOEHFVIVEHJOVVEHOJRVV I A TUALLY LIKED YOU

AND OSTIKA JIST LEAVING THE ALLIANCE LIKE THERE ARE NO MORE CAREERS LIKE HOW DID THAT DVEN HAPPEN

THEFES SO MANY PLOT TWISTS IN THIS CHAOTER AND IM SO EXCITED AND LIKE SIAS NOT EVEN ALIve HAHAHAAHAHAHAHA

ok sorry here is your good, grammar-worthy review :3

Sienna- kinda boring but awehhhh Siung fluff *.* kinda think that sienna will make it farther than kyung, tbh, just a vibe I'm getting.

Xander- okay just

WHO EVEJ IS L!? We know that Xander, Pomme, and Naomi at the very least have gotten monogrammed weapons.. But who is L? And why? Why so many sponsor gifts so early? Is L like a rich Capitol sponsor, predicting those who will make it far? Or maybe will give all the tributes weapons so over time, there can be a huge bloodbath? I'm so
YOURE MESN BOH JUST OUBLISH THE REST OF THE STORY :DDD

Okay so I like Xander, a lot, he's methodical and strategic in his ways of thinking and I predict a high ranking for him, yeah. But he killed Rian. And I just can't.

RIAN RIP BBYB I LOVE YOU SO FRIKIN MUCH AND LIKE IF YOU HAD ALLIED WITH SIA SHE COULDVE BEEN YOUR MEAT SHEILD UGH THE WASTED OPPORTUNITIES :')

Pstika- cray. The careers are no more, since I don't think Adrian will put up with Laela much more.
This is just... Plot twist alert, wow. go, mr. sticker!

Pomme- the first POV we get... And this chick is seriously evil. But smart. She can play the games as she wants, be a manipulative actress, but.. this is just wicked. No remorse? At all? This just.. I'm not sure on how I feel now that we see her up close..

Leon- Keighly and him are slowly falling out, it seems. I can't wait to see more from Leo, mainly because I think if he applied himself with force he could be a giant threat. :33

Chandler- I just gotta comment on briar cheering and Memrie going "shut da heck up you stoopid little gurl" like that just gets me

Pitchforks and torches.. Salem Witch trials, it seems.. Like, that's the vibe I'm getting... And yet I don't thikn the reference goes to that. Huh.

Porter Memrie Briar only one of you lives.. I predict Memzo ;.; bye Bri and Portyyyy ilyall ;.;

Naomi. Just team up with Pomme and be the remorseless Hearts club tbh.

SERIOUSLY WHY ARE ALL THE LITTLES SO EVIL!? Not even

The unlucky two ;.; porter (legit eh) and briar (bbyygggggg)

UPDATE SOONER MAYBE!? A NEW YEARS TREAT MAYBE!?

ok bye thanks for da update ;3
12/26/2014 c15 2Call Me Fin
Here I am, finally caught up and getting back to reviewing -

Okay so I understand that you were definitely going for that shock factor here, but don't we think we're nearing the unrealistic line? Aldora and Ceira both die, but Pomme (No POV?), Briar, Chandler, and an unconscious Laela all survive? It's your story and Naomi's still alive but hey that's shocking.

Okay deaths:

Caleb: His personality was rather boring, and he never stool out much to me, and I probably would have forgotten who he was if it wasn't for Keighly and Leon. I much prefer just those two so I guess I'm happy Caleb is gone.

Zeph: Zeph had a really nice blog post, but after that he lost my interest. His alliance was definitely the "I don't know what I'm gonna do with you, so I'll just put you together and kill you in the bb" alliance. I knew he was gonna die, so nothing shocking there.
POMME? What are you like I love her to death but what are you doing with her like? Can you give her a POV maybe idk?

Sia: Sia was one of my favorites in the Capitol, she was so desperate and cute idk I really liked her, but as soon as you put her with Zeph and Pomme I knew she was a bb, so I'm not shocked, just a little sad. RIP BBG!

Dewey: Background character to the extreme, one that was always destined for the bloodbath :/

Ceira: She wasn't a favorite, but she had the potential there to grow and become a really cool character, unfortunately now she never will :/ Idk I don't like that she died :/

Aldora: Again, not a favorite, but she had potential, and I would have liked to see her last a little bit longer, but I trust you have a good reason for this.

Evangeline: I liked her a lot more then I like Xander, so I'm sad to see her be the one to die out of the pair, and her death scene was even sadder. RIP

Questions here we go:

Surprise deaths? Aldora and Ceira for sure, but I also never thought Caleb or Evangeline would die so early, especially Evangeline, I thought Xander would want her help, but idk I don't like Xander so I hope the careers find him :/

Surprise Non-deaths:
Pomme? I like her but I know nothing about her so I assumed you'd kill her off so idk?
Briar/Chandler/Memrie - I thought at least one of them would die? Though they are split from Naomi and Porter so that may come soon enough.
Sienna/Kyung - what ever are they

Dying next: Pomme, Kyung, Briar, Chandler, Porter maybe?

Thanks bae for keeping Naomi alive and yeah have a good one
12/26/2014 c15 7Cashmere67
Questions.

Any surprise deaths?

Caleb, I guess. I thought he was a strong tribute and a smart enough one on his own, so I saw him making it further. You killed him, though.. So.
Ceira. I always had a feeling she was going to die; she had no place in the Careers or in the story, so it's fine. I thought Aldora would have lived, though.
Aldora. Yeah, she ded as well. Not much else to say about her. I thought she was going to live.

Any surprise non-deaths? What? Does this mean people who lived and I was surprised?
Chandler? Briar? Pomme? Laela.

Who do you see dying next?
Chandler, Briar, or Pomme. Laela maybe.

hooHOHOohohoh
12/25/2014 c14 President Snowflake
Sorry it's been a while, but I'm back to review again! Just in time for the peaceful part of the Games to end, oh man!

Krynne and Sullivan are so cute, I can't handle it. Sullivan's so sure one will win, but the odds are against both, and anyways I want them both alive, not just one! The thing with writing down their dreams was heartbreaking, I sincerely hope one of them wins! But there are also other tributes I want to win as well! The bloodbath is not going to be a fun time, I can tell you that.

Neat that you're following the movie's way of doing things, where all the tributes are on the same hovercraft heading to the Games. I just can't imagine how uncomfortable that would be, sitting with twenty-three other kids, any of which who might kill you. Worst road trip ever :)

Your description of the arena was beautiful - gory and horrible, but incredibly well-written and so easy to picture. The Games are already terrifying and the tributes haven't even moved yet! As for theme - is it the Salem witch trials? Torture chambers, prominent cross, dead girl in the fountain - Salem witch trials is the first thing that came to mind :) As for bloodbaths, I honestly have no idea - I don't want any of them to die! I guess I should suck it up and read the next chapter, but I'm SCARED. Especially for the little ones.
12/25/2014 c15 6LokiThisIsMadness
Let me comment on each dead tribute because le me is too lazy to comment on every POV. But yet, you deserve a review for being such a good updater and writer. :3 It's such a joy to read about children killing each other in Christmas!

Caleb: Honestly, I never really liked him. He never stood out to me, maybe just as Evangeline's district partner, but besides that, I can't say I'm sad to see him go. He was a bit boring and yeah, it was good for him to die in here.

Zeph: One of the little kids had to die, of course, but I'm still really suprised that Naomi's alliance didn't loose at least one member, since it's one of the biggest alliances, besides the Careers. Zeph, well, was never my favorite tribute but I guess he was cool.

Sia- ;-; So far, this was the death that made me really sad. (We'll get to the Careers soon, don't worry.) I really liked Sia and her silly personality, so I'm really sad to see her go. Pomme is on her own now, right? How the bloody hell dod she not die in here, that is something I don't understand.

Dewey: ...I had to go to the blog to see who he was, so I guess that says something. Loners never really stand out that much, do they?

Ceira: ;-; ;-; Okay, so two Careers dying in the bloodbath was a shocker. But I'm guessing that Ceira had it coming? I mean, Keighly is not someone that you can play with, Ceira. I loved her and I'm sad to see her go, but yeah.

Aldora: Shocker 2#. I can't say I liked Aldora as much as I liked Ceira, since she never really stood out among the other Careers, but I still liked her and she was a good tribute. Bah, I really disliked Xander this chapter. Idiot.

Evangeline: ...Bitch had it coming, just sayin'. She got too cocky for her own good and placed all of her trust on Xander. Like, wtf, Evangeline? You can't just trust a CAREER, out of all people. Can't say I'm sad for her.

Questions!

Suprising deaths: Ceira, Aldora. ;-; May they RIP.

Suprising non-deaths: Briar, Chandler, Kyung, Pomme.

Dying next: Little kids? Kyung and Sienna? Idk.

See you Sunday!

Merry Christmas!
12/25/2014 c15 5Vulkodlak
Wow, merry Christmas to me. Pstika racked up quite the kill count for someone without his prefered weapons! That was a dam good first encounter, felt a lot deadlier than it ended up being. which is good, yeah? A lot of people got bloodied up. Lots of crotch shots. One thing you should maybe work on is lingering damage? People injured o taking care of injured parties seem entiely too releaved? Like, they feel safe havng escaped, even with debilitating wounds that they likely don't know how to properly treat. if that makes sense. anywho, good work and happy holidays!
12/25/2014 c15 10nevergone4ever
merrryyyyyy Christmas !

Joy to the world AMIRITE

This was so intense oml

RIP SIA ILYSFM BBY I have a song all prepared for your death ok

"When you were just a little bby girl your momma used to tell you some crazy things
She used to tell you that your daddy was an evil man, she used to tell you that he hated you"
And that's it bc I just swiped it from an eminem song ;/

Any surprise deaths.. CEIRA?! ALDORA?! I thought for a bit you'd just kill of Laela, too, to make it just a career guy pack, but naww ;p Evangeline, too..

Any surprise non deaths? NO JOKE like why didn't brair die.. Or chandler... OR ANY BODY LIKE THAT HAHAHAAH

Who I see dying next.

CRAP IM BAD AT PREDICTING BC EVERYBODY HAS THEIR OWN PLOT LELL

Little kids? Maybe Porter? Or Siung?

Ok OKOK happy holidays

KERRY NEW YEARRRR
12/25/2014 c15 12jakey121
Okay, so I’ll just give a lil mention about each dead tribute. We celebrate the birth of Jesus on Christmas, so what could be better than reading kids being murdered :3

Caleb: He wasn’t my favourite tribute. Interesting in the way he thought towards Keighly and Leon, but I can’t say I’m upset he’s gone since he could have potentially been a major issue towards the pair from Ten (not that I care about Leon either).

Zeph: Is it weird that he was one of my favourites and I can’t even remember his personality? Yeah, probably. But I did like him- at least I remember that, so I was sad to see him go.

Sia: Too dramatic for my taste, there were times I could read her and enjoy whatever it was she was doing, but there were times her emotions just became wayyy too overbearing and just her reactions and interactions and everything killed her character for me.

Dewey: literally who?

Ceira: I never pinpointed her personality either, but I liked this POV that she had during this chapter, so I was sad she died too. Shocking, aye. But sad. Literally I dislike every other Career and you killed the only two that made me interested in the pack. Good job ;*

Aldora: I remember her form, so I think what kept me enjoying her during this story, despite a lack of focus on her character, was the fact I knew her personality from its original state and I enjoyed that, so she was always a good tribute in this. She came across hella ruthless in here, and usually that’s not my taste, but a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. Then she died. Oh.

Evangeline: Xander is one of my favourites, Evangeline never stood out until her death scene- surprisingly emotional, I actually really didn’t want her to die then, which is a sign of good writing if you can make me root for a character to get up and live if I’ve never liked them at all leading up to it.

Questions!

Surprise deaths: Caleb? Definitely Ceira and Aldora. I’m gonna miss them- literally couldn’t care about the Careers now.

Surprise non-deaths: Pomme? Without a POV, what is she even doing…? Chandler? Briar? Kyung? Sienna?

Who do I see dying next?: Any of the above.

back to christmas-ing byee
12/25/2014 c15 1tear that cherry out
bye aldora
bye ceira ;_;

Surprise deaths? I'd say the two Careers but I saw it coming for Aldora, but Ceira's was definitely a surprise. Caleb and Evangeline too, bye d3

Surprise non-deaths? District Nine. Maybe one of District Twelve too, and I completely forgot Kyung existed for the majority of the bloodbath.

Next death? Leon, Pomme, Laela. idk
12/24/2014 c15 11BamItsTyler
Ah Christmas . . . a time of good will, giant meals . . . materialism . . . Don't forget about children slaying other children with rusty weapons!

This bloodbath was . . . wow, slightly unpredictable due to certain aspects. A slightly majority of people that I thought would go extremely far, didn't unfortunately.

Surprised deaths?: Evange, Ceira, Caleb,

Non deaths?: The 9 pair, along with someone from like . . . 12? Not sure.

Who do I see dying next?: I'm not entirely sure, maybe someone from Naomi's cannon fodder, Pomme? Leon?

Memrie: Alright alright alllriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight, Memrie making a mission for Briar. Spades are pretty cool weapons, but pretty violent I could imagine. :3. I admire Memrie's ambition and strength for going up against Laela. The knocking her unconscious by Briar or Chandler was smart on their behalf. At least they made it in the end.

Porter: Porters D10? I think you meant D7 ;). It's an honest mistake, no biggie. Aldora seemed much much colder than what I thought she would be. I don't know why. Caleb dying was a shocker, but justified to an extent.

Sia: She puts up a decent fight here with Adrian. Woah! Zeph with the taking charge of things. They decide to save Pomme . . . oh man, I thought they were gonna tag team the bitch and beat her to death, but that isn't the caase. I frowned when Zeph was killed and Pomme left Sia to be tortured to death. Awh,

. . . but in the end, wasn't it me who made her out to be this way...?

:3.

huehuehuehuehuehuehue...

But in legit seriousness, I wished that went a little better :(.

Ceira: In all seriousness, I would've prefered Laela's death over Ceira's, but as you stated Laela's more belligerent and outgoing to have as "Head bitch". I see Naomi escaped certain death. Well, Deweys death was unfortunate :(. Oh, I thought Leon died here, but he's safe...for now. UGH . . . heel to the skull? I can only imagine the future deaths to come with an arena so desolate and violent. I''m sad to see her go.

Keighly: I'm not even sure how I'd feel in her boots...but it must be a suckish feeling no doubt. Despite their kinda rocky-ish differences, she carries Leon out of the BB like a tr00per! I wonder about this alliance and their future. Leon's isnt looking so bleak, judging by the wound he got.

Xander: I see that Evange and him are starting early with their Career screwing. MMmmm nuh-uh, the fight scene between Xander and Aldora reminds me of the one in Saving Private Ryan, everything with the desperate clawing and the knife entering her chest made me cringe on the inside. Imagine that, a girls nails raking across your face must be a bitch. And he screws over Evange, that sucks. I was really hoping for something bigger for the two.

Laela: Yet again, her bravado shines though here 100%, like Sticka said, she could've (most probably) been used as a scapegoat. But instead she dies. And the argument that ensures after the fact makes me wonder why adrian didnt Impale her while her back is turned. This leaves the careers at 3 people, already. This pack was already pretty plain. This leaves them at a disadvantage here. We got an alliance of 5 or so against 3 basically. I only wonder how these careers will meet their possible ends. I see Laela getting screwed over somehow. We'll have to see.

All in all, great combat, nice n' gritty which I like. Every scene flowed quickly and there were no errors.

I wonder what we have in stored for Sunday...

Merry Xmas Bobo. :D.
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