for Faker1/1/2015 c13 Guest
I wouldn't mind if Patrick got another Fullbringer. I also wouldn't mind if he ate a devil fruit. He could just stand on the water or force the water away from his body. Or he could mess with his devil fruit powers to make it so that he could swim in water.
I wouldn't mind if Patrick got another Fullbringer. I also wouldn't mind if he ate a devil fruit. He could just stand on the water or force the water away from his body. Or he could mess with his devil fruit powers to make it so that he could swim in water.
1/1/2015 c13 Guest
Glad to see this story is still going on, it is one of the rare self/OC insert I like around here. :)
You may not be used to writing fighting scenes, but I didn't felt it showing while reading! It was interesting and nicely done, and I appreciate the 'normalness' of Patrick in that fight. Still, how did Luffy got lost sooooo long damn?! Will Jango fight too? What about the original plot of strange people fighting in a devastated place full of dead people and cosplayers? Reminder or more informations soon? (I'm like a compass, never forgetting my north)
Thanks for the good and extra looooong chapter, and happy new year! :D
Glad to see this story is still going on, it is one of the rare self/OC insert I like around here. :)
You may not be used to writing fighting scenes, but I didn't felt it showing while reading! It was interesting and nicely done, and I appreciate the 'normalness' of Patrick in that fight. Still, how did Luffy got lost sooooo long damn?! Will Jango fight too? What about the original plot of strange people fighting in a devastated place full of dead people and cosplayers? Reminder or more informations soon? (I'm like a compass, never forgetting my north)
Thanks for the good and extra looooong chapter, and happy new year! :D
1/1/2015 c13 
1Ranger Station Charlie
Well since Patrick is a fullbringer he could try to manipulate sea water as a projectile weapon and defense. Ginjo manipulated the water in his glass during his fullbring demonstration. It be a great devil fruit defense, just submerging a part of a devil fruit user seriously weakens them. Learning how to use bringer light will allow him to catch up in terms of speed with most adversaries. Bringer light also will allow him to stand on air and snipe people from safety. Next is the basic push and pull abilities a full bringer has, Patrick in theory just has to barely touch someone and will launch them away. It won't be physically damaging like Luffy punches, but it will allow Patrick to gain some breathing room. Before he unlocks the next stage of fullbring Patrick should get the basics of a fullbringer down.
1Ranger Station CharlieWell since Patrick is a fullbringer he could try to manipulate sea water as a projectile weapon and defense. Ginjo manipulated the water in his glass during his fullbring demonstration. It be a great devil fruit defense, just submerging a part of a devil fruit user seriously weakens them. Learning how to use bringer light will allow him to catch up in terms of speed with most adversaries. Bringer light also will allow him to stand on air and snipe people from safety. Next is the basic push and pull abilities a full bringer has, Patrick in theory just has to barely touch someone and will launch them away. It won't be physically damaging like Luffy punches, but it will allow Patrick to gain some breathing room. Before he unlocks the next stage of fullbring Patrick should get the basics of a fullbringer down.
1/1/2015 c13 1Black Eclipsed Soul
great chapter! 2 things: no-it-all is supposed to be know-it-all and knew acquired strength is supposed to be new acquired strength.
1Black Eclipsed Soulgreat chapter! 2 things: no-it-all is supposed to be know-it-all and knew acquired strength is supposed to be new acquired strength.
12/10/2014 c5 Sceonn
And I thought this was going to be different. He knows everything about this world yet he still becomes a pirate after putting up a childish 'are not, are too' resistance.
And I thought this was going to be different. He knows everything about this world yet he still becomes a pirate after putting up a childish 'are not, are too' resistance.
12/1/2014 c1 2The Vale
This firt chapter is very weak - for 9000 words the reader gets basically nothing about the story other than 5 stupid antagonists with a penchant for slaughter exist and a giant gem with strange/unknown powers that grant them to the protagonist. we haven't really learnt anything about anyone involved at all. you could achieve the same effect simply by dumping the protagonist somewhere with no knowledge and fragmented memory due to a concussion - without the annoyance of 10 pages that effectively contribute nothing meaningful to the narrative.
2The ValeThis firt chapter is very weak - for 9000 words the reader gets basically nothing about the story other than 5 stupid antagonists with a penchant for slaughter exist and a giant gem with strange/unknown powers that grant them to the protagonist. we haven't really learnt anything about anyone involved at all. you could achieve the same effect simply by dumping the protagonist somewhere with no knowledge and fragmented memory due to a concussion - without the annoyance of 10 pages that effectively contribute nothing meaningful to the narrative.
11/30/2014 c12 1Ranger Station Charlie
Not too bad of a chapter probably could of sum it up more. One thing you need to be careful with is Luffy, I think you got his simplicity and naivety. Its his redeemable qualities you have to get down. When things get serous and there seems like no hope Luffy manages to always keep his crews morale up. He doesn't care what your past is as long as you don't harm is friends. Luffy best quality is not his strength but his ability to make allies. His fighting instincts, strength and endurance allow him to overcome all odds, Luffy is not a simple idiot.
Also when the crew gets farther down the line. A could back story would be for Patrick to claim his guardian (doesn't have to be a parent) was in navy intelligence and that's were his unprecedented knowledge comes from. That and another back story for his abilities come a navy R&D project of unknown origins. Another random idea is that he can claim his powers are an anti devil fruit weapon derived from the void century.
1Ranger Station CharlieNot too bad of a chapter probably could of sum it up more. One thing you need to be careful with is Luffy, I think you got his simplicity and naivety. Its his redeemable qualities you have to get down. When things get serous and there seems like no hope Luffy manages to always keep his crews morale up. He doesn't care what your past is as long as you don't harm is friends. Luffy best quality is not his strength but his ability to make allies. His fighting instincts, strength and endurance allow him to overcome all odds, Luffy is not a simple idiot.
Also when the crew gets farther down the line. A could back story would be for Patrick to claim his guardian (doesn't have to be a parent) was in navy intelligence and that's were his unprecedented knowledge comes from. That and another back story for his abilities come a navy R&D project of unknown origins. Another random idea is that he can claim his powers are an anti devil fruit weapon derived from the void century.
11/13/2014 c11 1Glasses freak
You're doing really well. I love your story. But I have to point out that 'Meshi' actually means food, not meat. I study japanese but I don't want to sound like a know-it-all, so I'm sorry if that came out as rude.
Keep up the good work. I love Patrick as a character (also when cranky) _
1Glasses freakYou're doing really well. I love your story. But I have to point out that 'Meshi' actually means food, not meat. I study japanese but I don't want to sound like a know-it-all, so I'm sorry if that came out as rude.
Keep up the good work. I love Patrick as a character (also when cranky) _
11/11/2014 c11 1Ranger Station Charlie
Your chapters are getting better. Glad you like Ussop too he may of started off annoying, well he still can be but he isn't the same kid that left his island. Still would love it if Patrick could help get Ussop on track of being a Warrior earlier. The Nami hatred is understandable before Arlong she was a first class *****. Even after she still had her moments, but be careful not to ruin the relationship with Nami complty.
If your looking for any kind of inspiration for Faker there's story called Nine Minutes by serpentguy. Its a great piece to read if you get stuck in a rut.
1Ranger Station CharlieYour chapters are getting better. Glad you like Ussop too he may of started off annoying, well he still can be but he isn't the same kid that left his island. Still would love it if Patrick could help get Ussop on track of being a Warrior earlier. The Nami hatred is understandable before Arlong she was a first class *****. Even after she still had her moments, but be careful not to ruin the relationship with Nami complty.
If your looking for any kind of inspiration for Faker there's story called Nine Minutes by serpentguy. Its a great piece to read if you get stuck in a rut.