for Blue6/8/2014 c4 
2Fire and Chaos
YES, PLUTIA! Love Plutia. Anywho, Avy is wonderful! So's Peashy. And all of them! Can't wait for the next chappie!
2Fire and ChaosYES, PLUTIA! Love Plutia. Anywho, Avy is wonderful! So's Peashy. And all of them! Can't wait for the next chappie!
6/7/2014 c3 8TMCraze
"KICK THEIR ASSES NEPGEAR!" -well played Avy. *hides in corner*
But in all seriousness, it's good. Derail the plot from time to time? Nothing much to say other than Rei had better get here ass handed to her on a DIAMOND platter.
8TMCraze"KICK THEIR ASSES NEPGEAR!" -well played Avy. *hides in corner*
But in all seriousness, it's good. Derail the plot from time to time? Nothing much to say other than Rei had better get here ass handed to her on a DIAMOND platter.
6/2/2014 c1 Guest
So now people take plots from good stories and still find a way to shoehorn OCs in them?
Don't think people have forgotten about The Proposal just because it has been a few months.
So now people take plots from good stories and still find a way to shoehorn OCs in them?
Don't think people have forgotten about The Proposal just because it has been a few months.
6/4/2014 c2 7G.N. Over-Kite
The animation? I only know bits and snippets of it.
I suppose the PlayStation Vita would somewhat work, given that a bunch of Neptunia games are going to be on it, but honestly, a little disappointed that another Sega console wasn't used. Then again, wouldn't doing that make her and Neptune sisters...? O_o Uh...
And no, Uni is the PSP, not the Vita.
Not much else for me to say here, you're doing good so far!
7G.N. Over-KiteThe animation? I only know bits and snippets of it.
I suppose the PlayStation Vita would somewhat work, given that a bunch of Neptunia games are going to be on it, but honestly, a little disappointed that another Sega console wasn't used. Then again, wouldn't doing that make her and Neptune sisters...? O_o Uh...
And no, Uni is the PSP, not the Vita.
Not much else for me to say here, you're doing good so far!
6/4/2014 c2 8TMCraze
I forgot you're following anime plot... not much changed really. Would've wanted more different scenes but whatever. Blue Heart better do something other than be trapped like the others (which btw have already been trapped twice if you count mk2). Nepgear and the other sisters to the rescue!
8TMCrazeI forgot you're following anime plot... not much changed really. Would've wanted more different scenes but whatever. Blue Heart better do something other than be trapped like the others (which btw have already been trapped twice if you count mk2). Nepgear and the other sisters to the rescue!
6/2/2014 c1 TMCraze
Lastaition -seeing that drove me nuts. Honestly I shouldn't freak out about something so small, but that's just me. Grammar problems? None from what I can see. Punctuation problems? None there either. Pretty good
I've never really been a fan of yuri fics, but this actually kinda would make me read more yuri fics. A new goddess has really been before by many people, but yet they have never had the new goddess mary another main goddess.
Huge potential, can't wait for more!
Lastaition -seeing that drove me nuts. Honestly I shouldn't freak out about something so small, but that's just me. Grammar problems? None from what I can see. Punctuation problems? None there either. Pretty good
I've never really been a fan of yuri fics, but this actually kinda would make me read more yuri fics. A new goddess has really been before by many people, but yet they have never had the new goddess mary another main goddess.
Huge potential, can't wait for more!
6/2/2014 c1 7G.N. Over-Kite
It's not a bad effort! So far, not much to Avyanna yet, so perhaps some more personality building is in order.
Also, a bit of advice, while "slaking" is a real word (and I don't mean the Pokémon), I think it's supposed to be "slacking" in the summary.
While not a rule set in stone, make sure that Avy represents a console from Sega! You know, with Neptune representing the console that never was, Nepgear with the Game Gear, and Plutia with the Genesis! Still rather stumped at what Avy's supposed to be. (Don't tell me she's supposed to be the 32x...! No, not the same one from PP)
I'm not too experienced with proper grammar and stuff like that, so if someone can jump in? It's fine to me though! I'll give this a chance, because this isn't something you see often.
7G.N. Over-KiteIt's not a bad effort! So far, not much to Avyanna yet, so perhaps some more personality building is in order.
Also, a bit of advice, while "slaking" is a real word (and I don't mean the Pokémon), I think it's supposed to be "slacking" in the summary.
While not a rule set in stone, make sure that Avy represents a console from Sega! You know, with Neptune representing the console that never was, Nepgear with the Game Gear, and Plutia with the Genesis! Still rather stumped at what Avy's supposed to be. (Don't tell me she's supposed to be the 32x...! No, not the same one from PP)
I'm not too experienced with proper grammar and stuff like that, so if someone can jump in? It's fine to me though! I'll give this a chance, because this isn't something you see often.