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7/25/2014 c1 vexennight
Update please
6/20/2014 c2 NatNicole
Firstly, you posted the same chapter twice.
Secondly, there are a fair lot of grammar mistakes, though that's not too big of a problem since the text can be still understood.
Thirdly, the plot idea is pretty much very good but the actual writing of the plot is fairly poor. You might wanna go over it and change it so it makes more sense.

PS. This is NOT a flame; it's advice.

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