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for Natsu Finds His Swords in a Mermaid

7/24/2014 c3 2AntiNalu34575
Great chapter!
I'm looking forward to more!
Sorry my review wasn't helpful, but it was truthful...
7/24/2014 c3 2Brayan Mariachi
Awesome! Can't wait for the next chapter!
7/22/2014 c2 Brayan Mariachi
Awesome! I can't wait for the next chapter! Please, update soon!
7/14/2014 c2 aradhey.gupta
feeling sad for natsu but the story is interesting and keep updating fast
7/14/2014 c2 26Yours truly - Pride
I like the progress you're making with this story! Just a small correction: Irony is used for contradictory things. e.g. Happy said so sadly. When you say something like "Happy said so happily", it's actually a pun (play on words). Otherwise, the story is great, keep up the awesomeness! I like the feelings and details you have portrayed in the story.
- Yours truly, Pride
7/14/2014 c2 AG
Nice. Please update soon!
7/13/2014 c2 2AntiNalu34575
I love your story!
Can't wait for an update!

7/13/2014 c2 1TheHeroFan
sumamente interesante espero ver como continua
7/13/2014 c2 1Serena of the Dawn
Great story. Please continue
7/13/2014 c2 mohamed
good story please update faster . im hoping for a confrontation between natsu and Lucy. Please update faster
7/13/2014 c2 1Siegriss
Poor Natsu...
7/11/2014 c1 Katsu Fan
Nice can't wait to see where this will go
7/10/2014 c1 treeofsakuras
Great chapter, this story seems really interesting. Can't wait to see the reason why natsu will be kick out of fairy tail. XD natsuxhisui!
7/10/2014 c1 Natsu Awesome
It is like a Natsu leaves the guild and Natsu was heartbroken story. This and tally might be a very interesting and nice story. Keep going for it dude.
7/10/2014 c1 26Yours truly - Pride
I like the storyline, it's similar to the "Natsu is heartbroken" stories but is also unique in its own ways, so I personally don't consider it cliché. Also, the way you made the Mermaids meet Natsu was interesting, not many people consider using flower shops in their stories. The only improvements I have to suggest are that you could make your stories more descriptive. Like, you could describe Natsu's emotions, his anticipation, excitement, nervousness, things like that. When he interacts with others (like in the flower shop), you can describe his facial expressions, his tone of voice, and do the same to the other characters. This would automatically add a lot of bulk to the story and make it more pleasing to read. One more thing is, you could space the paragraphs out more. That would make the chapters longer and make it easier to read. Last thing is: it's more comfortable to read when you put each dialogue in a new paragraph. Dialogues should start at the left of the page. It's just something I've personally always followed by convention. I hope I'm not being too critical here. Also, your first story was already good to begin with, and you've improved tremendously since then, so keep up the awesomeness!
- Yours truly, Pride
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