
6/9 c114 Guest
Moc pěkné velice zajímavý pohled
Moc pěkné velice zajímavý pohled
6/3 c67 sapphire2468
I don’t intend for this to be rude but you seem to forget a lot of plot points or maybe I’m skipping lines, that tends to happen with me. But didn’t the Lestrange brothers take the metamorphogus potion? Shouldn’t Rod be able to play as Luna’s dad if he’s already going with her?
I don’t intend for this to be rude but you seem to forget a lot of plot points or maybe I’m skipping lines, that tends to happen with me. But didn’t the Lestrange brothers take the metamorphogus potion? Shouldn’t Rod be able to play as Luna’s dad if he’s already going with her?
5/29 c86 Badbonita
Harry Potter's drink of choice - a magical version of a boilermaker
Or as what it's called around upstate NY. . . .
Harry Potter's drink of choice - a magical version of a boilermaker
Or as what it's called around upstate NY. . . .
5/17 c114 Badbonita
Going to miss this epic once you've finished it.
Thank you so much for keeping at it - even when the muse takes a vacation.
Going to miss this epic once you've finished it.
Thank you so much for keeping at it - even when the muse takes a vacation.
3/17 c114 kylie12potter
If you can't find the documents then maybe just make an OC. Like... I don't know, give Dumbledore a kid who mysteriously appears for revenge against their father or something.
If you can't find the documents then maybe just make an OC. Like... I don't know, give Dumbledore a kid who mysteriously appears for revenge against their father or something.
2/21 c114 leggyrespect123
This has been a great story :) Yes admittedly a bit draggy at parts but overall still keeps the reader's interest :P My suggestion for the 'final battle' is not to have yet another Order attack - that doesn't make sense since practically all the Order has been taken out already & it feels deja vu to pull out yet another one - but to have a final battle involving professional assassins hired by an Order sympathiser to take out Harry or just someone who wants to take over the MOM position & not let Tom have it. Would be lovely to read of a battle where the new Minister & his Undersecretary show themselves to be quite capable of leading the Aurors themselves in a battle, & win the allegiance of the Aurors (& other Ministry personnel) by demonstrating how capable they are of both leading raids or running the show in the ministry offices. If written from this angle, then I think - in my humble opinion - this story will round off & end nicely by moving it away from the Order attacks emphasis that are quite sufficient already.
This has been a great story :) Yes admittedly a bit draggy at parts but overall still keeps the reader's interest :P My suggestion for the 'final battle' is not to have yet another Order attack - that doesn't make sense since practically all the Order has been taken out already & it feels deja vu to pull out yet another one - but to have a final battle involving professional assassins hired by an Order sympathiser to take out Harry or just someone who wants to take over the MOM position & not let Tom have it. Would be lovely to read of a battle where the new Minister & his Undersecretary show themselves to be quite capable of leading the Aurors themselves in a battle, & win the allegiance of the Aurors (& other Ministry personnel) by demonstrating how capable they are of both leading raids or running the show in the ministry offices. If written from this angle, then I think - in my humble opinion - this story will round off & end nicely by moving it away from the Order attacks emphasis that are quite sufficient already.
2/21 c77
1Darknessdawns
So, there's an issue with the whole prophecy scene. Hermione should know nothing about it since the battle at the Ministry never happened, same for Harry to an extent. He shouldn't know about the way it was labeled since he never went to retrieve the prophecy. Voldemort walked into the Ministry polyjuiced as Lucius Malfoy and took the original with him, leaving a replica behind. I'm pretty sure this happened within the first ten chapters. So unless I've missed something Hermione should have no clue about any of it and there's been nothing said about Voldemort mentioning it to Harry.

So, there's an issue with the whole prophecy scene. Hermione should know nothing about it since the battle at the Ministry never happened, same for Harry to an extent. He shouldn't know about the way it was labeled since he never went to retrieve the prophecy. Voldemort walked into the Ministry polyjuiced as Lucius Malfoy and took the original with him, leaving a replica behind. I'm pretty sure this happened within the first ten chapters. So unless I've missed something Hermione should have no clue about any of it and there's been nothing said about Voldemort mentioning it to Harry.
2/21 c75 Darknessdawns
Well this chapter states that the holiday Sirius and Remus are on will end in about a month. The six months cruise holiday? Unless Dumbledore's court date was changed until December that shouldn't be happening. They didn't even decided to take the cruise until what mid to late August? The timeline in this story definitely gets confusing. Don't get me wrong, this is one of my absolute favorite Dark Harry pieces. I just can't help but notice the inconsistencies of the timeline. Not to mention that Dumbledore was captured on Harry's birthday when the wards around Grimmauld Place we're tripped when he went to try to find a book about stopping Fawkes. A few chapters ago the whole stopping Fawkes from assisting Dumbledore was mentioned again and it still had not been resolved. It hasn't been mentioned since within the story so I'm still curious on whether a solution has been found.
Well this chapter states that the holiday Sirius and Remus are on will end in about a month. The six months cruise holiday? Unless Dumbledore's court date was changed until December that shouldn't be happening. They didn't even decided to take the cruise until what mid to late August? The timeline in this story definitely gets confusing. Don't get me wrong, this is one of my absolute favorite Dark Harry pieces. I just can't help but notice the inconsistencies of the timeline. Not to mention that Dumbledore was captured on Harry's birthday when the wards around Grimmauld Place we're tripped when he went to try to find a book about stopping Fawkes. A few chapters ago the whole stopping Fawkes from assisting Dumbledore was mentioned again and it still had not been resolved. It hasn't been mentioned since within the story so I'm still curious on whether a solution has been found.
2/21 c72 Darknessdawns
When Ginny is on the witness stand Madam Bones asked her about the events of her Second year, rather than first.
When Ginny is on the witness stand Madam Bones asked her about the events of her Second year, rather than first.
2/21 c71 Darknessdawns
Another error. Harry' was 15 in his fifth year when he left Hogwarts, not fourteen.
Another error. Harry' was 15 in his fifth year when he left Hogwarts, not fourteen.
2/21 c71 Darknessdawns
Ok, I've noticed a minor error that has cropped up twice. It hasn't been years since anyone saw Harry. Harry left Hogwarts during the winter of his fifth year after secretly taking his owls. When Dumbledore was arrested it had been like 6 months and was August first of the same year. Essentially the summer before what would have been Harry's sixth year. At that time Harry was informed that Dumbledore's trial would be around the end of September the same year. So it's really only been around 7 to 9 months since Harry left Hogwarts. However it's been said that it's been 3 years at one point and just years at another.
Also Luna didn't return to Hogwarts for her 5th year. Has she taken her owls early or is that a typo?
Ok, I've noticed a minor error that has cropped up twice. It hasn't been years since anyone saw Harry. Harry left Hogwarts during the winter of his fifth year after secretly taking his owls. When Dumbledore was arrested it had been like 6 months and was August first of the same year. Essentially the summer before what would have been Harry's sixth year. At that time Harry was informed that Dumbledore's trial would be around the end of September the same year. So it's really only been around 7 to 9 months since Harry left Hogwarts. However it's been said that it's been 3 years at one point and just years at another.
Also Luna didn't return to Hogwarts for her 5th year. Has she taken her owls early or is that a typo?
2/20 c54 Darknessdawns
Oh. Apparently you caught that issue with the names. Why didn't you fix the error? At any rate I'll stop commenting on it.
Oh. Apparently you caught that issue with the names. Why didn't you fix the error? At any rate I'll stop commenting on it.