for Treasure Hunting: Kalinth's Sleeping Beauty11/2/2014 c2 
4Star-Shaped-X
'Sands of Time' is a neat-o name. :)
Whoa geez, what happened to the passengers Axel beat up? Did he toss them out the window or . . . are the disintegrated?
I like the way you described Axel's outfit, giving each piece a bit of backstory or explaining its use. You actually made me care about his clothes; I confess, I normally glaze over this stuff and just imagine the characters in their canon outfits. XD But not this time.
/Thank you/ for having Axel be an excellent fighter (as I infer from the train thing) who's still worried about being mugged! All too often I feel like people are written so that anyone who authors wish to portray as a good fighter must be /the best/ fighter, but what you did is far more realistic. I appreciate it. :)
Haha, that bit about Axel not being sure if Lexaeus is scary on purpose or not was funny. XD
"Don't worry, I'll make sure they have a good time!" This sounds like such an Axel thing to say. XD I think because it reminds me of when he promised to make sure Roxas made the grade.
Seeing Yuffie in the OTH sort of makes me wonder if Yuna, Rikku, and Paine will be here. :3 That would be fitting.
It was cool how you gave Axel the character trait of being bugged by blank walls. I think it goes well with him being a treasure hunter.
Them's some boss locks. :3
Ah, that scroll sounds awesome! 8D Whoever put it together is like an expert craftsman I bet. I want to read it so bad. X3 I'm quite certain this'll get Axel into the Second Order.
Hm, maybe a little long? For my tastes anyway. Just barely. I think I prefer chapters to be shorter than most people do though, so I dunno how much stock you wanna put in my opinion. XP It wasn't off-putting at any rate.
I really love this fic so far. :3 This first chapter definitely got me in the mood for a good treasure hunting story too. You did an excellent job setting up the fic to come with gripping details, and I'm excited to see the rest when it comes out. I'm really sorry it took me ages to review this, but you can bet I'll jump on the chance once chapter three is released 'cause it's really good! :3
4Star-Shaped-X'Sands of Time' is a neat-o name. :)
Whoa geez, what happened to the passengers Axel beat up? Did he toss them out the window or . . . are the disintegrated?
I like the way you described Axel's outfit, giving each piece a bit of backstory or explaining its use. You actually made me care about his clothes; I confess, I normally glaze over this stuff and just imagine the characters in their canon outfits. XD But not this time.
/Thank you/ for having Axel be an excellent fighter (as I infer from the train thing) who's still worried about being mugged! All too often I feel like people are written so that anyone who authors wish to portray as a good fighter must be /the best/ fighter, but what you did is far more realistic. I appreciate it. :)
Haha, that bit about Axel not being sure if Lexaeus is scary on purpose or not was funny. XD
"Don't worry, I'll make sure they have a good time!" This sounds like such an Axel thing to say. XD I think because it reminds me of when he promised to make sure Roxas made the grade.
Seeing Yuffie in the OTH sort of makes me wonder if Yuna, Rikku, and Paine will be here. :3 That would be fitting.
It was cool how you gave Axel the character trait of being bugged by blank walls. I think it goes well with him being a treasure hunter.
Them's some boss locks. :3
Ah, that scroll sounds awesome! 8D Whoever put it together is like an expert craftsman I bet. I want to read it so bad. X3 I'm quite certain this'll get Axel into the Second Order.
Hm, maybe a little long? For my tastes anyway. Just barely. I think I prefer chapters to be shorter than most people do though, so I dunno how much stock you wanna put in my opinion. XP It wasn't off-putting at any rate.
I really love this fic so far. :3 This first chapter definitely got me in the mood for a good treasure hunting story too. You did an excellent job setting up the fic to come with gripping details, and I'm excited to see the rest when it comes out. I'm really sorry it took me ages to review this, but you can bet I'll jump on the chance once chapter three is released 'cause it's really good! :3
8/13/2014 c1 6AquaYoyi-2b
I like this, i love fairy tales,really looking forward to this n,n Happy akuroku day n.n
6AquaYoyi-2bI like this, i love fairy tales,really looking forward to this n,n Happy akuroku day n.n
8/13/2014 c1 4Star-Shaped-X
Wow, I think this sounds really cool. :) It's a great twist on the fairy tale. I really enjoyed reading the opening story, really. And you even acknowledged that other versions of the tale exist, which of course always happens with these things but somehow I now realize never really comes up in most media's mythos. Always acting like the one tale told is the say-all-end-all. So that was cool.
Since the legend isn't over, I wonder if that means Naminé's still around. I mean, you said hundreds of years passed, but maybe her life span is longer than a human's. If so, I wonder what species her and her family are. Her brother must be Roxas, right? He was very brave. :) I'm definitely looking forward to Axel's journey to find him. (By the way don't answer my questions. XD I ask them to show I'm involved in your fic, but I really prefer to wait for the story to pan out, you know what I mean. Evil spoilers and all that. :P)
And hey, no worries on the MA thing. I wouldn't argue if you had it, but it really wasn't what I was expecting when I opened this fic up, so I don't feel like I'm losing anything or nothin' like that. Lemons are great and all, but I'm looking forward to your story! :D
Happy AkuRoku Day!
- Star-Shaped-χ
4Star-Shaped-XWow, I think this sounds really cool. :) It's a great twist on the fairy tale. I really enjoyed reading the opening story, really. And you even acknowledged that other versions of the tale exist, which of course always happens with these things but somehow I now realize never really comes up in most media's mythos. Always acting like the one tale told is the say-all-end-all. So that was cool.
Since the legend isn't over, I wonder if that means Naminé's still around. I mean, you said hundreds of years passed, but maybe her life span is longer than a human's. If so, I wonder what species her and her family are. Her brother must be Roxas, right? He was very brave. :) I'm definitely looking forward to Axel's journey to find him. (By the way don't answer my questions. XD I ask them to show I'm involved in your fic, but I really prefer to wait for the story to pan out, you know what I mean. Evil spoilers and all that. :P)
And hey, no worries on the MA thing. I wouldn't argue if you had it, but it really wasn't what I was expecting when I opened this fic up, so I don't feel like I'm losing anything or nothin' like that. Lemons are great and all, but I'm looking forward to your story! :D
Happy AkuRoku Day!
- Star-Shaped-χ