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9/13/2014 c1 uncomfortablebuffalo
I think I'm having a stroke.
9/13/2014 c1 2No.09
you HAVE got to be shitting me.
9/13/2014 c3 22JustGail
I hope you don't mind my cursing, but this is a load of cr*p.
At first, I thought you were joking. Then I realized that you seriously were doing this.
My betters have already commented and explained, but I must add my own two scents, or I will not be at peace with myself:
You are taking everything good out of the series.
This series isn't about witchcraft. The magic isn't even the center of the story, it's the tool, the instrument JK Rowling uses in order to show what the series is actually about:
Friendship, love, right and wrong.
This series encourages children to think, to see that there is evil and all of us and yet that we choose every day to be good. It talks about racism and equality and apparently, things that you are incapable of grasping.
Hermione doesn't have to be obedient in order to be good. McGonagall doesn't have to be pretty to be good. In fact, the entire point of Harry Potter is that it isn't our looks that define us, or prestige (such as the handsome and rich Malfoys), but the actions we take.
This I write despite - and perhaps because - of me being deeply religious.
Choosing to serve God is a choice we make every day. This is something all of us can do.
Evolution is real, and there is evidence for it.
The place of a woman is not at a husband's side, nor is it in the kitchen.
You're even taking the anti-abuse message out of the story. Do you understand how effed up that is?
I would not read this story to my children. Never in a hundred years. Harry Potter is so educational, so good - and you have, quite simply, taken your children's choice to think away from them.
I pity you.
9/13/2014 c1 18CodyRexBeth
As an atheist lesbian (two strikes against me?) this is one of the best fanfics I've read in a long time. Please keep updating it.
9/13/2014 c3 7Mockingbirdflies
All right... I only discovered this story a little while ago, and I'm trying my absolute best to keep calm and not leave too much of an angry rant in the reviews. I don't wish to come across as rude; I truly just want you to read, and maybe understand where some of these reviewers' comments are coming from.

Before I continue, however, there's a book I would like to recommend to you - "The Gospel According to Harry Potter: The Spiritual Journey of the World's Greatest Seeker" written by Connie Neal, the full version of which was published April of 2008. My sister adored it, and while I myself have not had time to read it in its entirety, I've flipped through several sections. If you take anything away from this review, remember that title.

Let's start out by saying this - I was raised Christian. My mother's family is Irish Catholic, my father's family primarily conservative Baptists, and while I myself was raised Episcopalian, I was surrounded by so many Christian influences, both positive and negative, as a child (after all, they're hard to avoid in the middle of Alabama's Bible Belt), that I feel as though I can speak with relative certainty on just how... for lack of a better word, wrong this story is.

Firstly, I would like to point out a few of the inconsistencies, both those against the canon of the series and those against the established canon of your own story. Some a very slight - for instance, Harry's eyes are green, not blue, Petunia is quite clearly a housewife in the source material, and McGonagall looks nothing like that (bringing up a point I will avoid because all it will do is just make me angry - being "pretty" doesn't make one a good person, and just because someone's a good person doesn't mean they'll be your ideal picture of pretty). Then there's the blips in your consistency, like Harry somehow magically knowing Bible verses and being able to quote them off the top of his head, despite having never actually read, or, evidently, seen, the Bible in his entire life. To an extent, a few of these can be tolerated, but some of these are just... painful. You did read the series, correct? I trust you're aware of Harry's situation with the Dursleys, then. He's made to do most all of the housework, regularly ignored (largely evident in Chamber of Secrets - book two - especially the movie), not well fed (not a definite staple of his time there, but it's shown at the beginning of Goblet of Fire - book four), and, most importantly, he is forced to live in a cupboard under the stairs for ten years of his life. Harry was not a happy child in the Dursley home (his birthdays are not celebrated by them in these books, and in fact, they're generally ignored by the family - I have no idea where you got the thought of the Dursleys offering him "second birthdays" to make him stay), and just about anyone you ask would agree that he was certainly neglected as a child, even abused. They treated him horribly because of his parents' "abnormality", and they were /glad/ to get him out of their lives.

And Hermione - I'm just going to touch on Hermione, I'm mad about Hermione - in the story, she's Muggleborn. If read the books (and honestly... I'm getting less and less sure that you did), you'll know that being Muggleborn during the Wizarding Wars (aka "mudblood" - meaning born from a family without any magical blood whatsoever) is basically the equivalent of being black in the 50s/60s - there's prejudice, there's persecution, there's unprovoked murders, and it's generally a bad thing to be, especially as you reach the later novels. Throughout the novels, she's constantly fighting against this prejudice, working hard to do her best and show all of the people who think she's worthless that she's so much more than her blood - but she's not going to deny that she's not pureblood, she loves her family. Hermione is not "the picture of innocence and godliness", she's a brilliant girl fighting for her rights and the rights of others, even when she's ridiculed - not an obedient girl who does everything she's told.

Also, Dumbledore? Married to McGonagall? I understand that some people ship these two, but I do hope you understand... Dumbledore is gay. Canonically. I'm serious, he's gay.

I'm not going to lecture too much on the "good Christian values" you're trying to get across in remaking - largely because I'm a bit too upset for that and I'm certainly not about to hunt down my parents' old Bible just to read and interpret all of these verses you've got sprinkled throughout this fic. However, I'm about ninety-nine percent sure that it's just... no. For one thing, the praying for teleportation? First off, that's literally just Apparation with an incantation, and also, as I understand, that's... not exactly how praying works. The way you employ the use of "prayers" in this story, well, it's extremely selfish, and not really what praying's all about.

Also, something very important - Harry Potter is a Christ figure. Again, I'll mention "The Gospel According to Harry Potter" - the new version now contains an analysis of the spiritual elements in all novels, including the seventh, where Harry's status as a Christ figure is surprisingly clear. There's a lot of Christian imagery in these novels - evidently, there's enough to write a book about it - and it really isn't an evil series, dedicated to "turning our children to Satan." Trust me, it's not.

I would start on your bit about Petunia being unable to prove evolution's existence, but honestly, I'm not sure there's much of a point. You do know that there's extensive evidence supporting evolution, right? Please, just consider picking up a Biology textbook and flipping through it. Do some outside research on evolution, look it up, check out some diagrams, if you like. To quote a favorite scientist of mine, Neil deGrasse Tyson, "The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it" - do some reading on evolution, and don't just dismiss it as bullshit Satanism. It's possible to believe in science and still be religious, trust me.

My sister handed me a copy of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone when I was nine years old. I own all the novels, I own all the movies, and I'm currently reading them in a second language. Those stories shaped my life and taught me so much, not to mention that they inspired me to get back to writing. They've changed the lives of so many, and for the better. They're not evil.

Please, consider letting your children read the novels themselves. If you'd like, read alongside them, and you can buy "The Gospel According to Harry Potter" (yes, I'm going to keep mentioning that) and pull it out so you can discuss some of the Biblical allusions and Christian imagery that's abundant in the stories. Trust me, if you're scared of these books making your kids become witches, this method of butchering the story and filling it with good, "Christian" values is not the way to go. If anything, they'll just go find a friend and read it behind your back.

If you want to talk about it, my PM box is open. Shoot me a message, I'll send you a few examples from TGAtHP, or just talk about the series and my experience with it. I'll keep my cool if you'll keep yours, and I'd be happy to discuss this all with you.

9/13/2014 c3 Lizi Rose
this is a beautiful story, and i shall read it to my brother
9/13/2014 c1 8Filthy Absinthe
When is the gay porn starting, and is it between Harry and Hagrid, or Harry and Vernon ? I'm having a hard time seeing where you are trying to get :)
Or maybe you're planning on a good ol' harry & draco, harry & snape, harry & ron ?
9/12/2014 c1 use1
I think we're all missing the point here.
As Christians, we are called to be different, peculiar, set-apart.

Maybe just the fact that it was a concern at all, should sent up red flags.

We sometimes forget that we have a VERY REAL enemy in Satan. We also tend to forget that he is NOT going to make his tools look like "his tools". That wouldn't be so subtle.

I feel the problem is that in God's way, there are definite, clear, absolutes. When we start looking at things caparatively to other things, the lines become blurred.

But when we see things lined up to God's Word, things become clear.

Deuteronomy 8:9-11 says, " 9 When you enter the land the LORD your God is giving you, do not learn to imitate the detestable ways of the nations there. 10 Let no one be found among you who sacrifices their son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft, 11 or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead. "

In today's world, those who are in the movies, become part of what is fed into our minds, we are CLEARLY told to avoid this influence AT ALL COSTS!

Maybe we should start being a bit more attuned to what the HOLY Spirit is telling us, and not trying to "make it okay" by justifying our why's and why nots.

Galatians 5:19-21 is also very clear on this matter.

19 The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

There are plenty of good solid Christian movies out there without confusing our children any longer by "accepting" what the Bible clearly states that God does not accept.

I'm sorry if I've offended anyone by this post, but I don't apologize for taking a stand to defend the Word of God. After all THAT'S our final authority (or should be) when deciding what to allow our children to watch and do, and to me anyway, the Bible is VERY CLEAR on this matter.

It shouldn't be an issue at all, if the Bible says to avoid it.
9/4/2014 c3 Guest
Just no. Just no. You are the abomination of writing.
8/30/2014 c3 Wow just wow
Please please please tell me you're joking. I was raised in a Christian household. I went to an all girls Catholic high school that was run by nuns. I waited until marriage, I've never smoked, never done drugs. That being said, your story is perverse. You are bastardizing both a beloved book series and the Christian faith. You don't want your children to believe in witchcraft, but you're willing to teach them that by praying you can be, for lack of a better word, teleported somewhere else. Please, let us know where that is in the bible?

And if you're a good christian mother, please tell me in the Bible it says that you must be beautiful to be a good person?

You need help. A lot of it.
8/30/2014 c1 Guest
I just found this fanfiction a few minutes ago, and I can honestly say that I'm slightly horrified. I have nothing against religions myself and I happen to be Christian but this is excessive. The Harry potter books aren't some cult-like novels that as you quote it "turn them into witches". The entire story line is about friendship, loyalty, and love and yes, although there are themes of wizardry in the books, it is very clear that dark magic is very harshly looked down upon! The whole point of the series is that love triumphs all!
Honestly, the Harry potter books are amazing works of art, and I've been left very confused as to what you're trying to accomplish with your fanfiction because you've completely changed the entire point of the story.
8/30/2014 c3 2ShinigamiRae
I feel you are the literal living embodiment of Beatrix Bloxam. I don't know how I feel about that...
Also Dumbledore wouldn't have married McGonagall. She's already married to someone else and Dumbles is gay.
8/29/2014 c1 Guest
I started reading this believing the summary to be a joke, and I can tell you it was the first time I have actually laughed out loud at at Fanfic in years. Although I am an atheist, I have no issues with religious people or religion in general, however I do have a problem with anyone, religious or not, who think that they and their opinions are better than everyone else. Harry Potter is a STORY. IT IS NOT REAL. (As an enormous potterhead, that hurt to say.) However, the magic within the books is. The power of friendship, of bravery and, most importantly, of love. If you feel it necessary to deprive your children of the development of these values, that is your choice. If you want to write this story, that is also your choice. However, don't expect everyone to agree with what you put. The magic of these books is the idea that power is not always great, and that love overpowers even the strongest curse, breaking through the barrier of death. You will never truly know the love, or friendship within these books, and I feel sorry for you.
From Lala, a fourteen-year-old 'fornicating, drug-addicted, evolutionist' and proud.
Ps. I do not, and never have, done drugs, although I do believe in the theory of evolution.
8/26/2014 c2 Guest
I'm confused. You are totally changing the parts of the book that you purportedly (as a 'good Christian' should be keeping. Petunia did NOT work out of the house, she was a housewife; she did not wear evil pantsuits (since when are sturdy practical boots sinful?) or have short hair, Vernon certainly didn't bake brownies, you wouldn't be able to see Hagrid's hairy chest (and is that modest, really? LOL) under that red plaid shirt, and how the hell could Harry be happy and healthy living under the stairs while suffering abuse such as you describe? Also, he's quoting chapter and verse of a Bible when he's never heard of it before. I'm sorry, but raging inconsistencies aside, this is just bad writing.

And WHERE on earth did you get that description of McGonagall? She was a good woman as is (stern, but fair), and didn't need to be blonde with long hair and young to prove it or as some sort of reward.

Have you even READ these books?
8/26/2014 c2 1McGonagall25
Very good so far. Can't wait to see where you take this.
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