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for Your Mother's Eyes

12/12/2017 c1 12PineNutPesto
Not a Snape fan, I take it?
2/7/2017 c1 2fhl1234
Whilst I'm sorry that Severus suffered in his youth, turning into a bad person isn't excusable behavior! He killed Lily! No, I always liked the idea of Lily and Severus being childhood friends. But don't worry Albus Dumbledore and Severus Snape, Harry obviously learned a great deal from you both and you certainly made an impact on his life either positive or negative. Perhaps no one will ever know the truth...thanks for sharing your opinion as to what made Severus into a killer. I pity him, but it was very masterfully written.
1/25/2017 c1 30SkyeMoor
The ending to this one is killer. Seriously, it's a really, really good ending. The earlier parts could use some cleanup - you want it tighter. Use of passive voice slows down the scene...
"harry was slowly edging towards the door"
try:
"Slowly, Harry edged towards the door."

"rather than the normal heated antagonism that was the norm" Repetitive, and you manage to reuse the same word, which makes it rankle more.

"Sit Potter and in case"
Try looking at this one as "Sit, Potter," Snape growled, "In case the obvious..." I think that removes the need for the "and" and reinforces Snape's mood.

The fewer words you use to express yourself, the better the story is.

(And I do like the part about Snape keeping Lily's eyes. Deliciously creepy).
7/27/2016 c1 Guest
inresting story, dam snape was the bad guy. I always thougth of it different when snape call lilly a mudblood it was because she was laughing why james was making fun of snape infront of the whole school. I now she said he was a death eather but what if at that time he never did anything wrong. and when she stop being friends with him that push him over to the dark side.
7/8/2016 c1 2slytherclaw7
Wow! That was quite an unexpected and dark twist at the end. But I can definitely see Snape doing this. Excellent job! Thanks for sharing!
6/13/2016 c1 2Skybox
That is a very, very, very evil Snape. I especially like the line "You can't have your mother's eyes, because I do."
6/7/2016 c1 1gne4eva
You should have let Harry tear him apart...that would have been the start of a really dark Harry blowing apart part of the castle...nicely done.
5/23/2016 c1 Guest
OMGWTFBBQ!
3/14/2016 c1 Mrs. SeverusSnape1490
Okay... A lot of problems here...

1. Severus hates the word "Mudblood" And when he used it against Lily he hated himself. Never in my life do I see Severus saying "Lily you are my Mudblood" It's not him!

2. Saying the word fucked? God... It's not fucked its raped. He raped. Fucking made it sound like he enjoyed it, when I am in minds Severus hated to Rape anyone.

3. I don't think Severus would spill all about that to the Harry.

4. Severus was ONCE loyal to the Dark Lord but then turned and became LOYAL to Albus and became a spy for the LIGHT
10/17/2015 c1 Snowfall
Well... that was absolutely chilling. Brilliantly written, I adore the ending.
3/11/2015 c1 Guest
When, you said seriously dark, you really meant it. Well written, beyond chilling, and just... sick, sick Severus.
1/20/2015 c1 dfjgdigjrgterter
Oh... WOW.
This was indeed dark (deliciously so). I have many interpratations of Snape, and in one of them he is very obsessive... And this just fits on one of my ideas of him. There's love on this story, but it's so overshadowed by madness and cruelty... Nah, I don't know what else to say, just that it was very well written... And the end, ah, the end was sublime!
I would favorite it twice if I could.
10/13/2014 c1 KrayKross
You actually shed a light. He was utterly obsessed with Lily and had pure hatred aimed at James. Who's to say he hadn't targeted James family in revenge! Obsession creates insanity, just like it did to MD Chapman and John Hinckley. Love the darkness of this story.
10/5/2014 c1 12excessivelyperky
Ewww! Too gross, but I love it!

Would you Obliviate me, too?

Wow, you really had us going there in such a short story. Well done.
9/8/2014 c1 17The Lonely God With a Box
!

Whoa. Whoa. What of mine inspired this?

It's very well written. Like you said, dark and disturbing. I would say I liked it, if I didn't have the conflict of "Snape is a good guy" (in theory) vs. "Snape is a (very) bad guy" (in your story) going on in my head.

The ending though. Then ending was a pretty awesome way to end the story. Good job!
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