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for Tapanga super mom

11/18/2014 c1 12The Teal Dragon
LOL this reminds me of my foster mother Zion lol she's like a fierce momma bear. this is a good fic. :)
10/31/2014 c1 ScarletPuppy83
It's Topanga. -️ :)
9/24/2014 c1 83LoveShipper
Mama bear and no one messes with her :)
9/24/2014 c1 27Broadwaygirl21
Ok, I liked the plot. Topanga sticking up for Auggie is adorable... But... There are a LOT of grammar errors. And, well, you just don't really capture the characters well. You're writing is good, it just needs a little work.

1) It's Topanga, not Tapanga. Sorry, that really bothered me...

2) Don't be so repetitive.

This sentence: "Principal Simmons," Tapanga said, "you go ahead and suspend him. I will file a lawsuit so fast your head will spin. My son was defending himself according to you. There is no reason for him to be punished for defending himself. He didn't start the fight. He didn't attack Ava-"

"I understand but the rules are the rules. Mrs. Matthew you're a lawer. Surely you understand-"

"What I understand," Tapanga said, "is that my son is not going to be bullied by his school for sticking up for himself. It is not going to happen. If I have to call every newspaper and news station in the world I will not allow my child to suffer."

This is how it would be better: "Principal Simmons," Topanga began, "You can suspend him if you'd like, but I'll file a lawsuit so quickly, it'll make you're head spin. According to you, my son was merely defending himself. That is absolutely no reason for him to be punished. He didn't attack Ava, he jus-"

"Rules are rules, Mrs. Matthews." Simmons said, cutting the brunette off. "You're a lawyer, surely you understand."

"What I understand," Topanga began, "Is that my son is currently being bullied by his own school. And I'm not going to let that happen. I don't care if I have to call every newspaper and newscast in the world. I will not allow my child to suffer."

One last thing, capitalize the first letter of each word in the title. It's should be "Topanga Super Mom," not "Tapanga super mom." It just looks unprofessional.

I'd like to point out that I don't hate you. I'm not attacking you. I just honestly think that this story has a lot of potential, and people aren't reading it because you didn't phrase it correctly.

If you want, please PM me, so I can help. I'd really like to! ;)

Great story,

Rae.

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