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for The Journey of a Betrayed Master Book 1: The Master's Tournament

11/15/2016 c1 Unnamed reader
Interesting has a lot of potential although in not sure how I feel about arceus being female. Oh well my opinion doesn't matter see ya
9/11/2016 c3 Katsuragi-san
Yet another clichè "Ash has been betrayed" fanfic. I don't mean that this types of stories are cliche, its actually how it's written. Ash gets betrayed because he lost another league, sounds ok so far, betrayal starts at Ash's house, hmmmm... sounds a bit used, then he dissapears along with the people who still trust him, no comment, then he returns during a tournament being overpowered as fudge, seriously how many times does this need to happen... And that's barely the surface...
9/4/2016 c5 Yami no Hebi
Awesome chapter again bro
9/4/2016 c4 Yami no Hebi
XD cool chapter bro
9/4/2016 c3 Yami no Hebi
Awesome chapter man. If I can ask. Will ash get all his Pokémon back?
9/1/2016 c3 12Gold Testament
Was Torterra the only stolen Pokémon?
9/1/2016 c1 Gold Testament
They killed Ash's mom, are they going to blame it on him too?
7/3/2016 c3 1oghren
So far this story seems great and has a few grammar issues but overall not bad. Though this chapter does seem a little rushed and confusing. Still keep up the good work.
6/21/2016 c9 RFerguson21
hey chris, I want to say gj on the chapter and want to ask Ash if he has any legends on his team... thank you and Ash, gl with the harem... girls will be jealous with one each other
6/4/2016 c13 HyperspaceGamer
The word "love" is being thrown around way too easily. For Iris, It was kinda understandable. Ash and Iris knew each other quite well. But Hilda and Mei; Ash barely even knew them. He saved them and that was about it. But for Serena, it was even worse; Ash met her one day when he was 7, forgot about her, and the day they meet up again (at least in realization), they say "I love you". It's understandable if it was just romantic interest, as in liking that person, but for how little he knows them, he shouldn't be saying "I love you" so easily. When you do so, it just has so much less meaning.
5/23/2016 c5 EeveeTheImmortal
Noice
4/7/2016 c9 1shadowroserules
l
3/8/2016 c2 Guest
For each pokemon they stole, crush thier balls.
No not thier pokeballs.
3/8/2016 c1 Guest
Wait, So your telling me that well Arceus was essentailly daydreaming about Ash, while possiblely culling a community or two (and destroying the sourronding area) with what could be called Hellfire on steriods. AWESOME!
PS: Ash, DO NOT piss her off.
2/22/2016 c13 The Cartographer
That whole last bit was me screeching JOHN CENA.
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