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4/24/2020 c8 Borello
this story is really interesting. i hoped to read more chapter.
7/7/2019 c8 benjamin
me gusta tu historia, al principio solo queria agregar al harem a Ino (su aptitud y su forma de ser son adecuadas para no molestarle estar dentro ademas su personalidad mandona, osada y a la vez muy femenina de ella le da puntos) y tenten (fue la mejor kunoichi de konoha lastima por estar en desventaja con temari ademas su aptitud es de lo mas genial ess una buena guerrera apero a la vez es cariñosa y amble con sus amigos eso le daría algo de equilibrio al harem de naruto ademas esta ala par de hinata en ser sexi en especial en el shippudem) pero ahora que has logrado una actitud ruda y genial en hinata haz que le patee el trasero a neji me da lastima siempre la mal matan en ese combate ademas como has señalado en la historia, su padre al considerarla debil la dejo desantendida y hinata al ver la muerte de naruto y ver que no hizo nada para ayudarlo bien pudo tener un entrenamiento secreto mas al superar su disgusto de lastimar a otros seria logico que se vuelva una genial kunoichi.
5/4/2019 c8 Dominus1389
Please continue with this fic
11/8/2018 c8 Guest
You know if naruto and co. were out BURNING scrolls and picking off the contestants, there really shouldn't be enough people here to do a prelims. Just seems a VERY unnecessary step. Yes it has the highest amount of contestants(blame that on crappy teachers and their overinflated egos! A turd painted gold is STILL crap) BUT that was BEFORE the forest. and BEFORE naruto.
11/8/2018 c8 Guest
So NOW orochi wants to "pick a fight" with kumo too? It is possibly the MOST MILITARIZED village on their planet, has THREE jinchuriki and a kage that went toe-to-toe with minato! He's already got konoha to deal with and quite probably suna after this crush debacle is over, he can't AFFORD anymore enemies. So sorry, but THIS time his reach is exceeding his grasp! He is SUPPOSEDLY not stupid, so he should recognize this. If naruto was with konoha then this would not be an issue (as he's already taking on konoha) but naruto IS NOT.
11/7/2018 c7 Guest
Also the third didn't think it was ODD, when naruto died and there was no "TITANIC boom of escaped chakra that killed every single person in the leaf?" You'd think he'd have that nobody stopped the idiot council person from causing (what they thought) a nuclear explosion from happening right NEXT TO THEM?
11/7/2018 c7 Guest
A VISITING village knows as much or more then them, when it's happening in their backyard? Do you see the problem with this? 2 villages, an invasion, one formed by orochi and the kage killed and konoha has no clue... What exactly is jiriaya doing? (obviously, not being a spy) So the hokage's internal spy network can't spot anything (there is an army under his village) and his external can't seem to find his own ass with a mirror, a map and flashlight. How is this the MOST POWERFUL VILLAGE AGAIN?

Also Iwa has 2 jinchurki, kumo now 3... Konoha has lost ALL it's sannin, tsunade said "screw u", the toad seems to be just constantly jacking off, and orochi? Is planning something bad! So.. lets review: no sannin, no jinchuriki.. and EXTREMELY weak cadets!...ummm.. Konoha isn't sitting pretty anymore. Don't you think the MORON in charge might notice this and try to change it? Or the shinobi might wake up and go.. "oh man, we are screwed".. and FORCE the change?
11/7/2018 c7 Guest
Personally I don't see the THREAT, I mean.. "yeah they could TRY to kill us, but they can't kill me, that would be impossible for them and if they try on you or karu, I go full-on nine-tailed and raze their village to ashes, then dad knows there will be no peace, and brings kumo's armies to clean up the mess...so it's basically a VERY LOSE-LOSE situation for them" SEE? No threat. However, why they are still in this exam and NOT in a war after the stupidity in the council room is beyond me, that kind of idiocy would start a war IRL. 3 jinchuriki and the death god's direct attention vs 0, YEAH I can honestly say kumo can afford to KICK THIS ONE OFF!

I don't understand all this emphasis on another story, I mean "first male nin" is BASICALLY just another harem story, they are all over the place. I don't mind sex in a story (even explicit) but if sex IS the story? Then you need to go back to the drawing board! These characters (nins) BARELY have enough time to sleep and get dressed, let alone be screwing 24/7! Their world is COMING UNGLUED! If sex works in a MOMENT of the story, that's fine.. very REAL and even kinda cute (regardless of if it gets nasty).. But to design an entire story around that ONE act? That seems rather absurd. It's like focusing on a freckle while a MASSIVE creature is devouring your leg!
11/7/2018 c6 Guest
"we can't kill her, after all we're seeking to improve relations" DIDN'T THAT HORSE ALREADY LEAVE? Considering the council member that basically killed him IN FRONT OF THE KAGE? I'd say the time for diplomacy already RAN OUT!(that was a VERY STUPID MOVE btw) It should have shut EVERYTHING down!
11/6/2018 c6 Guest
I WOUND like him to get with hinata (at least a fling if not married) because nobody deserves to be that into something and get NOTHING (I still naruto slept with sakura in canon at least once)... If they get get nothing, it makes the whole "you can achieve anything if you try hard and long enough) thing kinda FALL FLAT...
11/6/2018 c6 Guest
"future mistress"? I never really understood that.. After you get past the entire Christianity/Judaism thing, the whole thing of ONE wife is kinda DUMB (even as far back as Aztecs and Egyptians there were MULTIPLE wives, none were mistresses, they were ALL wives. they were ALL considered royalty.. mistresses were what the royalty got on the side in secret (for some odd reason). and in the naruto series religion is kinda an "iffy thing" they seem to have multiple gods and even the "good guys" are hired MERCENARIES... Sooooo.. "god" and "gold" seem to be interchangeable. So the point is... "marriage" seems kinda SUBJECTIVE... Not at all like our world.. You need to research FURTHER BACK.
11/6/2018 c6 Guest
Shouldn't naruto be A LOT more FED UP with konoha? I just mean he's effectively a "hungry ghost" and SOMEONE there was the murderer.. Those AREN'T known for their forgiving natures. Maybe toward kumo and at least merciful to those that don't start something with him and didn't BEFORE, but to ALL others?... It would be THE WRATH OF DEATH and HELL ITSELF! Even if you go the "kuei-jin" route, he's NOT going to be "NICE" to konoha, at least until he gets his murderer, and all those that LET it happen... The whole "hero" thing is basically done, he ALREADY gave his life... Even him being a person of the village.. THAT'S OVER, that THEY ENDED.. This is someTHING else.
11/6/2018 c6 Guest
I can think of a BIGGIE that NEEDS naruto to GO AWAY (never been created) and that's the DEMON in the first movie... EVERYTHING he does kinda becomes MEANINGLESS if there is a "gatekeeper" (the death god), he is hemorrhaging power! Naruto has GOT TO GO, but since he can't DIE, then he's gotta be turned to their side or at least convinced not to go against them! He is a MOST SERIOUS PROBLEM! The shinigami threw a BIG FAT BLONDE MONKEY WRENCH in EVERYBODY'S plans! (not just mortal's)
11/6/2018 c6 Guest
Lemme guess your another author that's going to ascribe all kinds of abilities to orochi that he SIMPLY DOESN'T POSSES aren't you? Naruto DIED AND CAME BACK, talked with GOD, made a BET! You realize that's potentially a LOT more threatening then some jackson-pedo-wannabe that "plays with dead bodies"... Orochi has become a MOOT point. a FOOTNOTE, UNIMPORTANT! You start dragging gods, eldritch horrors. dragons or anything else into the story and orochi becomes a pathetic little bleached-skinned WORM! Of absolutely NO importance.

It's like a darksied vs. superman fight, lex has to do all he can to not just get STEPPED ON/SQUASHED by them when they are throwing down. *I doubt they'd even NOTICE they did it till long afterward*, same thing applies here.. orochi and the councils of konoha are LEX, superman is naruto and darksied is how the ninja world operates... THEN WE have the dipshit akutski (at least in this one don't have itachi and fish-fry jumping the gun.. THEY CAN'T EVEN USE NARUTO UNTIL LAST, so DON'T SHOW UP!) (and that's IF they can can get it out of him AT ALL, Gods CHANGE the playing field by just SHOWING UP! I can think of THREE scenarios where it would be IMPOSSIBLE to get the kyuubi anymore and their plan is trashed, OFF the TOP OF MY HEAD.)
The problem becomes: IF the akutski is OBSOLETE/DEFUNCT, danzo is a terrified, crippled old man AWAITING JUDGEMENT like ALL of konoha, and orochi has been turned into a JOKE and sasuke? well he should have died even before the story I'm commenting on started... who's LEFT standing? Most authors say nobody.. But naruto is FILLED with ALL KINDS of bad guys! My gawd you can barely see how the boy has a LIFE with all the bad-guys in the series. So what if they don't WANT anything from him, they NEED HIM to GO AWAY!
11/6/2018 c6 Guest
"that's soooo mean"... THAT'S THE BEST YOU GOT? How about "your family in hell says hello, and they will be seeing you REAL SOON!", or "your dead family really wants you BACK soon! They miss you." Naruto has been DEAD, he can say ANYTHING AT ALL about their dead relatives/friends (even lie) and there is NOTHING the living can do to DISPROVE what he says! Talk about WASTED potential.

Naruto was strong enough to die and get REBORN/RESURRECTED... NONE of the uchiha could do that, and none of kakashi's friends or sarutobi's... They were all too WEAK. That SHOULD paint a VERY GRIM picture to them of their chances in KEEPING him... GODS ARE INVOLVED so that means whatever humans want? NO LONGER MATTERS. I would expect the leaf to descend into BACK-BITING and the age-old BLAME GAME! They have to face the fact, that redemption MIGHT be IMPOSSIBLE. Now it's just JUDGEMENT!
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