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3/21/2019 c31 Guest
Please update soon, I miss your story!
9/16/2018 c31 Guest
more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more
9/27/2017 c1 AnimeLoverKenzo3
Please update Yumeiro Patissiere Remix soon!
8/22/2017 c31 Sam
Pleaseeeeeee keep going I want more !
8/17/2017 c31 Paula
Please keep posting this story i love it !
7/1/2017 c31 MaidenOfFireAndChaos
This is great please update soon!
6/18/2017 c18 1InkyDove309
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ヽ A
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レ ノ ヽ_つ L
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6/12/2017 c31 AnimeLoverKenzo3
PLEASE UPDATE Yumeiro Patissiere Remix!
11/9/2016 c30 Regina Zodiac
this story is great! please update it soon! :-)
10/29/2016 c31 Yjy
Love it story
Don't give up, I will continue to support u
6/20/2016 c1 Thecrazygirlnextdoor101
Love the story...haven't found any story like this one
Very unique
Please continue :)
4/29/2016 c31 1LeeChoonHee
Wow I really like this story and how you wrote it
I really love Yumeiro Pâtissière
Can't wait for you to update it XD
4/20/2016 c31 3RandomWriterPerson
Interesting idea. And the idea of a Jaded and skilled Ichigo is quite interesting. Which of course means imagining Aoi in her coodere, noja-loli voice and I think the image of Ichigo would also need a revamp.

*noja-loli : usually a loli-babaa who speaks in a particular way (~なのじゃ). Watch Dance in the Vampire Bund for a good example. Also voiced by Yuki Aoi.

However the entire story feels VERY VERY VERY rushed. I felt like I was reading a summary of each episode rather than reading the actual flow of the story. It feels as though there isnt much control overall and the balance is very titled to one side. Also, while I enjoy the idea of a NON dojikko Amano Ichigo, it feels a bit too Mary Sue in this one, despite saying she isn't as skilled as the sweets princes, she has been depicted to be well above her peers and has no weaknesses, even excelling in academics.

I'm not saying that your idea is bad, I'm just saying that you should flesh out your characters more. In a fanfiction, depsite having an already completed series to base ot off on. ALWAYS assume that your readers dont know the first thing about your character. Take time with details and explanations, but take note; there is a FINE line between explanation and exposition.

And walls of texts are a definite NG.

This story feels like it has a lot of potential to go with the plot differences and varied twists fron the original, however, I am not certain if it might be because English isn't your first language, but I wouldn't want to presume. However I havr met many foreign writers who write in English despite it not being their native language and it does have a similar feel.

From the subtle grammatical off-flow of a paragraph to the few obvious vocabulary mistakes littered throughout the story. There is a hint of hesitation in your writing, as though you weren't sure if that was the correct word to be placed in said context. And some areas where the flow of a sentence breaks due to a misplaced preposition or colloquial.

You might wanna consider getting some help in that area; a proof reader to smooth out the kinks in the story to allow it to flow better for smoother reading. I can volunteer, however, my writing style is rather... interesting... for lack of a better word. Check out my works if you ever have an interest though my fandom may not be your cup of tea.

I would suggest a rewrite someday if you ever have the time for it. And work on your paragraphing skills as well mainly because walls of texts are pretty hard for anyone to read. I can help with those if you want. But that choice is entirely up to you.

I have actually just rewatched Yumeiro Pattisiere for the Nth time, so I have a pretty good flow of the entire story. Plus I understand Japanese so, I catch the minute details that the subtitles miss as well. It is a rather fun anime to watch despite it being made for kids. The whole 'useless main protag who grows and matures with the story' is a common recurring trope in Japanese Anime. Male or female regardless. Usually completely useless and a total dojikko who matures into a fine adult, or a complete and total OP loveable idiot who learns there is more to the world that just what they had previously known. (Shokugeki no Soma)

Either way, Japanese love their idiots. Thats why 'Baka' is also considered an endearing term depending on the context.

Please consider my suggestions.
RWP
4/14/2016 c1 7Make FFN Sensible Again
Someone stole your story: /s/11812973/1/Melting-Sun
2/28/2016 c31 awefanfic
please update soon!
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