for Sympathetic Properties5/15 c47 CuredElfFish
47 chapters in, and I still find the sudden shifts of perspective & POV jarring. As a limited action - much internal dialogue piece, it's technically interesting, and distinct among fan fiction. Sometimes the POV shifts and black-and-white interpretations of how characters see the world irritate me so that it's work to read to the end of a chapter. I do find the writing and the story engaging however. And the confusing painful-to-parse-what -happened events are fewer now than in some earlier chapters. I like Litchfield the goblins & Bill very much.
47 chapters in, and I still find the sudden shifts of perspective & POV jarring. As a limited action - much internal dialogue piece, it's technically interesting, and distinct among fan fiction. Sometimes the POV shifts and black-and-white interpretations of how characters see the world irritate me so that it's work to read to the end of a chapter. I do find the writing and the story engaging however. And the confusing painful-to-parse-what -happened events are fewer now than in some earlier chapters. I like Litchfield the goblins & Bill very much.
3/19 c10 OtterSett
I love the tone in this story. You really captured a magical world that feel whimsical. You mentoned Dahl's Matilda in an earlier chapter, and your writing remids me of that. Characters are taken to the edge of being too extreme, but stop at the perfect place before they go too far. Or maybe it's just that the way you're writing them fits very well in this story.
I love the tone in this story. You really captured a magical world that feel whimsical. You mentoned Dahl's Matilda in an earlier chapter, and your writing remids me of that. Characters are taken to the edge of being too extreme, but stop at the perfect place before they go too far. Or maybe it's just that the way you're writing them fits very well in this story.
2/20 c19 bookivore
First I’ll comment that Dumbledore turning Hogwarts into the Asylum for people who Don’t Teach is what I hate most about him. But then you had him observe that Lockhart chased admiration rather than knowledge (skills) and i had to wonder when Dumbledore went from learning and sharing knowledge to listening to the subtle hints of the Greater Good. Or was Dumbledore also always not a teacher? Some things about his backstory hint that he was never too interested in helping people learn.
First I’ll comment that Dumbledore turning Hogwarts into the Asylum for people who Don’t Teach is what I hate most about him. But then you had him observe that Lockhart chased admiration rather than knowledge (skills) and i had to wonder when Dumbledore went from learning and sharing knowledge to listening to the subtle hints of the Greater Good. Or was Dumbledore also always not a teacher? Some things about his backstory hint that he was never too interested in helping people learn.
2/10 c1 Obsidian Dreamweaver
Dear Author,
I hope you are doing well!
I read your story Sympathetic Properties yesterday, and I really enjoyed it. It was so interesting that I felt it could be turned into a beautiful comic or animation.
My name is Lydia, and I am a professional commission artist. I create comics, manga, character designs, novel illustrations, and animations. I love making comics and manga, and I believe I can bring your story to life through my artwork.
If you're interested in commissioning artwork, feel free to contact me:
Discord: lydiacrazy
Instagram: lydiacrazy1
Twitter: lydiacrazy88
DeviantArt: lydiacrazy8
Email:
I look forward to bringing your story to life through art!
Best regards,
Lydia
Dear Author,
I hope you are doing well!
I read your story Sympathetic Properties yesterday, and I really enjoyed it. It was so interesting that I felt it could be turned into a beautiful comic or animation.
My name is Lydia, and I am a professional commission artist. I create comics, manga, character designs, novel illustrations, and animations. I love making comics and manga, and I believe I can bring your story to life through my artwork.
If you're interested in commissioning artwork, feel free to contact me:
Discord: lydiacrazy
Instagram: lydiacrazy1
Twitter: lydiacrazy88
DeviantArt: lydiacrazy8
Email:
I look forward to bringing your story to life through art!
Best regards,
Lydia
1/31 c41 KYKid942
As a consumer of fanfiction, I heartily applaud your stance on resisting the siren song of monetary remuneration for your efforts. As you say, that will erode the community, and cause the lawyers for the original authors to get involved and defend the rights of said original authors, and then we all lose.
As a consumer of fanfiction, I heartily applaud your stance on resisting the siren song of monetary remuneration for your efforts. As you say, that will erode the community, and cause the lawyers for the original authors to get involved and defend the rights of said original authors, and then we all lose.
1/31 c35 KYKid942
What? The whole story isn’t about Harry? Say it ain’t so!
I know, I know, you’ve spent the past 35 chapters PROVING that very point, but to actually come right out and SAY so, in HARRY POTTER FANFICTION? *gasp* You might make my head explode.
(Here is a /s, for those who need it.)
What? The whole story isn’t about Harry? Say it ain’t so!
I know, I know, you’ve spent the past 35 chapters PROVING that very point, but to actually come right out and SAY so, in HARRY POTTER FANFICTION? *gasp* You might make my head explode.
(Here is a /s, for those who need it.)
1/30 c41 ImmortalsDoItForever
I don't see how this would work. Fan fiction is only allowed as a purely creative effort because no one is receiving any money for it. Once you charge anything for it, you are in violation of the copyright laws. And we would never be allowed to do crossovers either. They are so much fun, I'd hate to have that happen.
I don't see how this would work. Fan fiction is only allowed as a purely creative effort because no one is receiving any money for it. Once you charge anything for it, you are in violation of the copyright laws. And we would never be allowed to do crossovers either. They are so much fun, I'd hate to have that happen.
1/28 c5 Chris Fox
I've read four and a half chapters, and each and every single one of them makes me want to kill myself...
I've read four and a half chapters, and each and every single one of them makes me want to kill myself...
1/18 c24 majere4
"
Bill said, eyeing their mother as she cut up Dobby's food for him into little pieces.
"
Holy crap that is too funny!
"
"Sirius never struck me as a coward though," Lichfield said, and Harry noted the use of just the first name.
"
It's wonderful to see how minch more observant and involved Harry is.
"
"For all your talk, you've barely told me anything useful since this whole thing began," Harry said hotly. "You've played hide-and-seek with information about my family, lied about not knowing them when it suited you, and yet you're springing it on me now like it's some sort of prize.
"
I note the old man's arguments to these arguments by there absence.
"
I don't care about some godfather I never knew or a Minister I've never heard of. I don't want to fix the world, and I don't need someone to act like the guardian I never had
"
Ouch. There's that kid from Cannon whose first thru fifth impulses were to stick his head in the sand - at least if it involved himself. Still, just making the demand to stop being treated like a prize mushroom is a big stretto forward.
"
Turning around he saw the wild-haired little Lady-wife of his mop-headed, pint-sized boss.
"
*slow blinks*
I double dog dare him to call her that to her gave lmao!
"
he also had never foreseen a twelve year old handing him his ass and telling him to get back to work.
"
He's definitely out of practice dealing with humans, let alone kids!
"
"Why the hell am I Apparating, flooing, and walking to work if you could just take me there directly?"
Mipsy gave him a shrug like all he'd had to do was ask.
"
Love it!
"
In a hushed tone he said, "Don't tell her this, but technically, I don't own her.
"
...'But you might some day.' Seems a great follow up to me?
"
"I'd explain what I was doing when you stopped me from doing it, but that'd be speaking the Unspeakable and you'd have to transfer to my department first.
"
... I think I understood all of that!
"
With a shout of victory in their native tongue he gave the signal to fly. And with cumbersome steps and the beat of leathery wings, the goblins took to the sky. Tonight it started; tomorrow, everything would change.
"
That's not a Pig!
"
Bill said, eyeing their mother as she cut up Dobby's food for him into little pieces.
"
Holy crap that is too funny!
"
"Sirius never struck me as a coward though," Lichfield said, and Harry noted the use of just the first name.
"
It's wonderful to see how minch more observant and involved Harry is.
"
"For all your talk, you've barely told me anything useful since this whole thing began," Harry said hotly. "You've played hide-and-seek with information about my family, lied about not knowing them when it suited you, and yet you're springing it on me now like it's some sort of prize.
"
I note the old man's arguments to these arguments by there absence.
"
I don't care about some godfather I never knew or a Minister I've never heard of. I don't want to fix the world, and I don't need someone to act like the guardian I never had
"
Ouch. There's that kid from Cannon whose first thru fifth impulses were to stick his head in the sand - at least if it involved himself. Still, just making the demand to stop being treated like a prize mushroom is a big stretto forward.
"
Turning around he saw the wild-haired little Lady-wife of his mop-headed, pint-sized boss.
"
*slow blinks*
I double dog dare him to call her that to her gave lmao!
"
he also had never foreseen a twelve year old handing him his ass and telling him to get back to work.
"
He's definitely out of practice dealing with humans, let alone kids!
"
"Why the hell am I Apparating, flooing, and walking to work if you could just take me there directly?"
Mipsy gave him a shrug like all he'd had to do was ask.
"
Love it!
"
In a hushed tone he said, "Don't tell her this, but technically, I don't own her.
"
...'But you might some day.' Seems a great follow up to me?
"
"I'd explain what I was doing when you stopped me from doing it, but that'd be speaking the Unspeakable and you'd have to transfer to my department first.
"
... I think I understood all of that!
"
With a shout of victory in their native tongue he gave the signal to fly. And with cumbersome steps and the beat of leathery wings, the goblins took to the sky. Tonight it started; tomorrow, everything would change.
"
That's not a Pig!
1/17 c23 majere4
"
Once Dumbledore was taken then perhaps he could travel to Geneva, bribe the I.C.W. guards that held the man, and slash his throat knowing that even if he followed soon afterwards that vengeance had been served. …Or perhaps he should just poke Lester to get on with what he was doing, accept he had done his best, regrow his hair, go about making a few Acquisitions with Trixie, and settle down to quietly run Gringotts for the next decade or two. But why did that feel like failure?
"
Ugh... perhaps the most difficult task of writing things from a non-human perspective is just that: 'They' are not 'Us'. Even the prevarication above is entirely too relatable... and then, at least I suspect, this is only because our dear Barchoke is looking at only the simplist of options in front of him with an entirely relatable motivation, and even that is due to his position of official power that allows him to consider these options.
A 'normal goblin', one Above to be sure as I'd not even guess the nature of those Below, would likely have much different - perhaps more 'direct' - thoughts and plans.
"
One day, if things went well, they might actually gain international recognition as an independent sovereign state and use that leverage to overturn the Ministry's stifling regulatory regime. Barchoke tried to rein himself in though by remembering the old goblin adage: 'Never count your Warboars before they can fly.'
"
First, the idea of an independent Goblin Nation has incredible implications, both for the wizzy world and, more specifically, our dear Hero and Heroine.
Second... Flying Warboars!? Holy Frijoles!
Lucy's scheming sounds pretty good... for him. I'm not so sure they would all work out for his benefit in the long term, should he be able to get everything he wants. I'm also wondering how much of it would pan out at all if it weren't for the fact that the goblins aren't near as stupid as he assumes they are.
"
"These people didn't know what was going on any more than you did," Harry explained. "So why make them feel horrible about not knowing when it's not going to do any good? And since everything is going to come to out into the open eventually anyway, I might as well let them hear about it from someone neutral rather than shouting at them."
...
"That's a very – mature way of handling this, Mister Potter,
"
Very mature, and even easy to accept after taking that tour thru his actual ruminations on 'getting even', the whole of which help make him that much more 'real and likeable'.
"
What did it matter if he was a renter or not? He still stayed here and ate their food, and he'd be as good as a member of the family once she went out with him. Surely it counted enough for them to make him stay when she didn't want him to go. Even having him beaten and bruised and needing to be nursed back to health after a nasty Quidditch accident would've been better than having him go, because at least then she'd be the one caring for him rather than letting him go off with the enemy, Hermione Granger.
"
* !*
Good Gravy, after Ginny's rather sociopathic daydreams, Hermione's internal panic-fueled monologue was Exhausting!
...and then More of Tween 'round the Twist? What did we do to deserve this assault on our sanity?
As to your 'moving camera experiment', I didn't see how it was a terribly major change from most scene changes when the characters are all present. While it wasn't 'professionally edited', it was smooth enough to be easy to read and understand - what else do people want!?
"
Once Dumbledore was taken then perhaps he could travel to Geneva, bribe the I.C.W. guards that held the man, and slash his throat knowing that even if he followed soon afterwards that vengeance had been served. …Or perhaps he should just poke Lester to get on with what he was doing, accept he had done his best, regrow his hair, go about making a few Acquisitions with Trixie, and settle down to quietly run Gringotts for the next decade or two. But why did that feel like failure?
"
Ugh... perhaps the most difficult task of writing things from a non-human perspective is just that: 'They' are not 'Us'. Even the prevarication above is entirely too relatable... and then, at least I suspect, this is only because our dear Barchoke is looking at only the simplist of options in front of him with an entirely relatable motivation, and even that is due to his position of official power that allows him to consider these options.
A 'normal goblin', one Above to be sure as I'd not even guess the nature of those Below, would likely have much different - perhaps more 'direct' - thoughts and plans.
"
One day, if things went well, they might actually gain international recognition as an independent sovereign state and use that leverage to overturn the Ministry's stifling regulatory regime. Barchoke tried to rein himself in though by remembering the old goblin adage: 'Never count your Warboars before they can fly.'
"
First, the idea of an independent Goblin Nation has incredible implications, both for the wizzy world and, more specifically, our dear Hero and Heroine.
Second... Flying Warboars!? Holy Frijoles!
Lucy's scheming sounds pretty good... for him. I'm not so sure they would all work out for his benefit in the long term, should he be able to get everything he wants. I'm also wondering how much of it would pan out at all if it weren't for the fact that the goblins aren't near as stupid as he assumes they are.
"
"These people didn't know what was going on any more than you did," Harry explained. "So why make them feel horrible about not knowing when it's not going to do any good? And since everything is going to come to out into the open eventually anyway, I might as well let them hear about it from someone neutral rather than shouting at them."
...
"That's a very – mature way of handling this, Mister Potter,
"
Very mature, and even easy to accept after taking that tour thru his actual ruminations on 'getting even', the whole of which help make him that much more 'real and likeable'.
"
What did it matter if he was a renter or not? He still stayed here and ate their food, and he'd be as good as a member of the family once she went out with him. Surely it counted enough for them to make him stay when she didn't want him to go. Even having him beaten and bruised and needing to be nursed back to health after a nasty Quidditch accident would've been better than having him go, because at least then she'd be the one caring for him rather than letting him go off with the enemy, Hermione Granger.
"
* !*
Good Gravy, after Ginny's rather sociopathic daydreams, Hermione's internal panic-fueled monologue was Exhausting!
...and then More of Tween 'round the Twist? What did we do to deserve this assault on our sanity?
As to your 'moving camera experiment', I didn't see how it was a terribly major change from most scene changes when the characters are all present. While it wasn't 'professionally edited', it was smooth enough to be easy to read and understand - what else do people want!?
1/17 c22 majere4
I'm of the opinion that every citizen of a country should have to serve that country in some way. Be it social services, armed services, doing public works, or whatever, every person should have to serve in some capacity so they understand that freedom isn't free and their country doesn't "just run itself". I'd also be fine with someone paying 1/10th of their government assessed Net Worth (assessment paid by citizen) to avoid this duty. :D
That said, I believe that every fan-fiction reader should be required to memorize your A/N
"
You, as readers, are in a very unique position: you get to know what's going on in different character's heads and lives at different points in time. It's not everyone at all times, but you're privy to much more than the individual characters are
"
...and to take an oath recognizing that they accept that fiction characters are not perfect and do not know everything that the readers know. It would (hopefully...?) drastically reduce the number and sheer idiocy of the comments to the contrary.
*gets down from soapbox*
(Thankfully, authors can just delete the truly offensive comments. I realized I'm repulsed by reading rotten reviews lol)
"
"She and some of her friends paid me a visit last year after we had become friends," she replied with a perturbed look on her face. "She didn't think I was worthy of the honor."
"
See, this is the kind of thing I'd expect a "properly raised" 11-yr-old pureblood snob to do. Mini-malfoi aside, the low-key intimidation and 'united front shunning' fits much more with both their age and their actual capabilities.
The fact that Harry and Hermione can banter along about it and their respective 'worthiness' just adds to the whole narrative of how genuinely good they are together. At the risk of approaching fanboi-hood, you do this so much better than canon, and a fair bit ahead of many "Romance" tagged fics, let alone those tagged Drama/Humor.
"
"Well," he said, turning to Hermione. "If we do end up having twenty kids, at least I know I can pay for them." He must have overshot the mark because his girlfriend's face went directly to utter embarrassment and even McGonagall looked stunned.
"We may not have a castle left standing once you two are done. Merlin help us if you have any children at all," McGonagall said finally, looking forward to a disastrous future beyond them.
"
*thankful to be sitting down as I shake with helpless laughter*
"
"I guess you're right," he said. It was times like these that Harry was really glad she was around to talk to. None of that would've occurred to him at all, and he actually did feel better.
"
She really knows him well, it's great how she can help lift him up...
"
"Come on," she said, pulling him towards the door. "Let's meet some of these twenty-one kids of yours – and if you mention that again they may be the only kids you ever have," she was quick to add.
"
...and then firmly ground him!
"
"Check your books when you get a chance, there should be a tuition already paid under the name of Constance Lichfield – this was thirty-five years ago or more. I'm not going to be using it and it should be used for something good instead of just sitting there."
"
*weeps*
The Slytherins were an interesting addition. Pansy's meltdown aside, the implications seem clear that some of the more thuggish deez were either jailed or killed leaving their families with no source of income... and thereby relying on charity. That mini-malfoi somehow managed to take credit for this - and likely further his position in Slytherin House with the perceived debts - is one of the few truly clever things I've seen him do.
(I realize that I'm making LOTS of assumptions here.)
"
I've known for ages that Luna would be brought in at this point but to be honest... I was afraid of writing her.
...
I tried to keep as much of that inherent "Luna-ness" intact as possible though because Luna will always be Luna.
"
It's all you can do with such a widely used and wildly differently portrayed fanon character. I look forward to her being a part of your story.
I'm of the opinion that every citizen of a country should have to serve that country in some way. Be it social services, armed services, doing public works, or whatever, every person should have to serve in some capacity so they understand that freedom isn't free and their country doesn't "just run itself". I'd also be fine with someone paying 1/10th of their government assessed Net Worth (assessment paid by citizen) to avoid this duty. :D
That said, I believe that every fan-fiction reader should be required to memorize your A/N
"
You, as readers, are in a very unique position: you get to know what's going on in different character's heads and lives at different points in time. It's not everyone at all times, but you're privy to much more than the individual characters are
"
...and to take an oath recognizing that they accept that fiction characters are not perfect and do not know everything that the readers know. It would (hopefully...?) drastically reduce the number and sheer idiocy of the comments to the contrary.
*gets down from soapbox*
(Thankfully, authors can just delete the truly offensive comments. I realized I'm repulsed by reading rotten reviews lol)
"
"She and some of her friends paid me a visit last year after we had become friends," she replied with a perturbed look on her face. "She didn't think I was worthy of the honor."
"
See, this is the kind of thing I'd expect a "properly raised" 11-yr-old pureblood snob to do. Mini-malfoi aside, the low-key intimidation and 'united front shunning' fits much more with both their age and their actual capabilities.
The fact that Harry and Hermione can banter along about it and their respective 'worthiness' just adds to the whole narrative of how genuinely good they are together. At the risk of approaching fanboi-hood, you do this so much better than canon, and a fair bit ahead of many "Romance" tagged fics, let alone those tagged Drama/Humor.
"
"Well," he said, turning to Hermione. "If we do end up having twenty kids, at least I know I can pay for them." He must have overshot the mark because his girlfriend's face went directly to utter embarrassment and even McGonagall looked stunned.
"We may not have a castle left standing once you two are done. Merlin help us if you have any children at all," McGonagall said finally, looking forward to a disastrous future beyond them.
"
*thankful to be sitting down as I shake with helpless laughter*
"
"I guess you're right," he said. It was times like these that Harry was really glad she was around to talk to. None of that would've occurred to him at all, and he actually did feel better.
"
She really knows him well, it's great how she can help lift him up...
"
"Come on," she said, pulling him towards the door. "Let's meet some of these twenty-one kids of yours – and if you mention that again they may be the only kids you ever have," she was quick to add.
"
...and then firmly ground him!
"
"Check your books when you get a chance, there should be a tuition already paid under the name of Constance Lichfield – this was thirty-five years ago or more. I'm not going to be using it and it should be used for something good instead of just sitting there."
"
*weeps*
The Slytherins were an interesting addition. Pansy's meltdown aside, the implications seem clear that some of the more thuggish deez were either jailed or killed leaving their families with no source of income... and thereby relying on charity. That mini-malfoi somehow managed to take credit for this - and likely further his position in Slytherin House with the perceived debts - is one of the few truly clever things I've seen him do.
(I realize that I'm making LOTS of assumptions here.)
"
I've known for ages that Luna would be brought in at this point but to be honest... I was afraid of writing her.
...
I tried to keep as much of that inherent "Luna-ness" intact as possible though because Luna will always be Luna.
"
It's all you can do with such a widely used and wildly differently portrayed fanon character. I look forward to her being a part of your story.
1/16 c21 majere4
"
"Aunt Maggie's always been a bit standoffish but now it looks like she's adopted him. If you'd asked me a month ago I'd've said he was like a little brother of mine that's always out of sight somewhere getting into trouble, but now he's stopped by it's more like he's a young cousin who's fun to tease," she said with a smile that was obvious even through the closed door.
"
This is a fun insight that is probably quite widespread.
"
She'd been fighting to be something different but on the wrong front entirely. It would have to be done by being open-minded, friendly, and non-judgmental. Hermione only wished it didn't seem such a daunting task because she hadn't had any practice at doing that at all. It'd be much easier just to get her mother to swear.
"
They are both growing up.
"
He had only been asking about Hogsmeade, he was pretty sure of that, so there was no doubt that Hogsmeade was the official start of things – unless he got sick and threw up all over her shoes, in which case he have to hope she felt sorry for him and let him have a mulligan.
"
Annnd yet, still very much not grown up!
"
Madam Malkin didn't carry belts though out of fear people would take them for ties and choke themselves; there were few enough wizards as it was, she said.
"
I... *shakes head and gives up*
"
One weird thing though was that under remaining balance on his bank receipt it said, "A lot: See Overseer Barchoke," which Harry had no intention of doing today at all.
"
First, that's classic! Second, it's been real fun as both Harry and Hermione diligently avoid returning to the bank - in their heads.
"
"That's barbaric. I wouldn't say I'm the best at everything though," she continued in the same stilted manner. "Parselmouths are supposed to be very good kissers – but I don't know if it's true."
Harry's brain suddenly stopped.
"You need your books," Hermione observed, placing the borrowed book back on the shelf and departing at once.
"
Poor sod, he's just been flummoxed upside the kisser!
"
He'd been… remarkably affectionate today, more so than she'd thought possible given all the things that could've gone wrong with his upbringing, though she supposed completely normal people were possible even when brought up in abnormal situations. Just look at her: she had a cartoon father and a robot mother but she had turned out alright.
"
You keep flinging these zingers!
Hermione is taking the 'independent person' thing too far. Not only refusing to allow him to make things even - which is important for him and therefore rude of her to discount, but then paying for enough things to throw the balance off again. The issue there is that when he realizes it, he'll feel bad again...
I'm gonna be really confused if the Parkinson's needed the Hopefuls to pay for her schooling.
"
"Aunt Maggie's always been a bit standoffish but now it looks like she's adopted him. If you'd asked me a month ago I'd've said he was like a little brother of mine that's always out of sight somewhere getting into trouble, but now he's stopped by it's more like he's a young cousin who's fun to tease," she said with a smile that was obvious even through the closed door.
"
This is a fun insight that is probably quite widespread.
"
She'd been fighting to be something different but on the wrong front entirely. It would have to be done by being open-minded, friendly, and non-judgmental. Hermione only wished it didn't seem such a daunting task because she hadn't had any practice at doing that at all. It'd be much easier just to get her mother to swear.
"
They are both growing up.
"
He had only been asking about Hogsmeade, he was pretty sure of that, so there was no doubt that Hogsmeade was the official start of things – unless he got sick and threw up all over her shoes, in which case he have to hope she felt sorry for him and let him have a mulligan.
"
Annnd yet, still very much not grown up!
"
Madam Malkin didn't carry belts though out of fear people would take them for ties and choke themselves; there were few enough wizards as it was, she said.
"
I... *shakes head and gives up*
"
One weird thing though was that under remaining balance on his bank receipt it said, "A lot: See Overseer Barchoke," which Harry had no intention of doing today at all.
"
First, that's classic! Second, it's been real fun as both Harry and Hermione diligently avoid returning to the bank - in their heads.
"
"That's barbaric. I wouldn't say I'm the best at everything though," she continued in the same stilted manner. "Parselmouths are supposed to be very good kissers – but I don't know if it's true."
Harry's brain suddenly stopped.
"You need your books," Hermione observed, placing the borrowed book back on the shelf and departing at once.
"
Poor sod, he's just been flummoxed upside the kisser!
"
He'd been… remarkably affectionate today, more so than she'd thought possible given all the things that could've gone wrong with his upbringing, though she supposed completely normal people were possible even when brought up in abnormal situations. Just look at her: she had a cartoon father and a robot mother but she had turned out alright.
"
You keep flinging these zingers!
Hermione is taking the 'independent person' thing too far. Not only refusing to allow him to make things even - which is important for him and therefore rude of her to discount, but then paying for enough things to throw the balance off again. The issue there is that when he realizes it, he'll feel bad again...
I'm gonna be really confused if the Parkinson's needed the Hopefuls to pay for her schooling.
1/16 c20 majere4
From deranged dumbles to megalomaniacal malfoi, that was one crazy chapter change!
I commend you on Harry and Hermione's interactions. You've already written more genuine, personal interaction than the whole of the series, so kudos all around.
"
She felt her fingertips meet his and couldn't help but feel a warm tingly feeling as a small smile grew on her lips. She didn't look at Harry, but she didn't need to; that little bit of him was all she needed.
"
This is just the kind of sappy little gesture that a couple of kids just figuring out the whole 'like like' thing would do. I like like this story. Like, a lot XD
From deranged dumbles to megalomaniacal malfoi, that was one crazy chapter change!
I commend you on Harry and Hermione's interactions. You've already written more genuine, personal interaction than the whole of the series, so kudos all around.
"
She felt her fingertips meet his and couldn't help but feel a warm tingly feeling as a small smile grew on her lips. She didn't look at Harry, but she didn't need to; that little bit of him was all she needed.
"
This is just the kind of sappy little gesture that a couple of kids just figuring out the whole 'like like' thing would do. I like like this story. Like, a lot XD